The Transgender Thread

[theruiner]

I'm sorry, but I don't think you understand. You have not demonstrated that you understand. And no, I absolutely do not support gender stereotypes in any way shape or form. But I do feel the way I feel. And if that's supporting gender stereotypes, then there are a HELL of a lot of transsexuals who feel the same, because I've met and talked with them and been on message boards and read books and blogs and websites and have been researching this for years and years and years, and I can tell you that the vast majority of the MTF transsexuals I've met and read about and seen and interacted with grew their hair out and acted feminine and liked feminine things (as well as a lot of masculine things, I'm sure, as most women and men don't fall strictly into either category, nor should they) and they were excited to wear women's clothes. And a lot of the FTM transsexuals wanted to have short hair and wear men's clothes and liked men's things and, I'm sure, some female things to. That doesn't mean they believe in gender stereotypes, that just means they felt the way they felt and liked what they liked, just like a lot of women and men in our society who didn't feel they were born into the wrong sex have hair and clothes and behavior and likes and dislikes that fall very much into what is traditionally considered masculine and feminine and then there are people who fall every where on the spectrum. I won't apologize for the way I feel, and I won't let someone tell me that the way I'm living my life is somehow wrong, or that because I would like to transition to the opposite sex and I would like to have long hair and wear dresses somehow means I'm fitting into "gender stereotypes." If I took hormones and had a sex change and kept my hair short, hated dresses and only wore men's clothes, would I then be acceptable to you?

I don't like being portrayed the way you're trying to portray me because you are, flat out, wrong. And I do not think you understand. What you've said during the course of this conversation makes me think you don't. Maybe I'm wrong. But it definitely seems like you're getting mad at me when maybe you should be getting mad at a LOT of people, like, most of society who oftentimes fall into their traditional gender roles and are ok with that. My whole thing has always been, if you feel more comfortable being in a "traditional" gender role, if you're a woman and you want to have long hair and wear dresses and your interests, hobbies, behavior, whatever, falls into what society terms the "female" category, then fine. I have no problem with that. I have no problem with guys who are the same way on the opposite side, and I have no problem with anyone who falls in between. I do have a problem with people that tell anyone they're wrong for how they feel or what they like or, in the case of transsexuals, that they're wrong for wanting to be in the typical societal gender role. If that's the way they feel and that's what they want, more power to them.

I don't know if that made any sense. Sorry if it didn't. I don't feel like going back to re-read that and edit like I normally would. So forgive me for any redundancies or typos or anything else.


Edit: As far as the way I feel, I never claimed to "know" it's wrong, the way a lot of transsexuals do. There are a lot of people like me, who have these feelings but haven't quite nailed down if we are, in fact, transsexuals or if it's something else and if we are, what we want to do about it. I can only tell you what I've already said. And I've always identified as 'transgender' for that very reason, because that label I know fits, since it's an umbrella term, but 'transsexual' may or may not at the end of the day. Hopefully some day I'll know for sure.