How fucked was your day?

[elevenism]

So, okay.

This is continuing the story above, on this page, about my godmother. Since she left here, she's been in and out of mental hospitals, regular hospitals, jails...
BUT, her sister told us she was "doing great," and dropped her off at our house. But it was immediately apparent that she was NOT ok, AT ALL. She doesn't know what's going on.
Within like 72 hours, she attacked my mom AGAIN, and then started crawling down the hall on her hands and knees, making weird noises.
I had to call the police, AGAIN (that's something i don't do, period.)
She wound up in the hospital.

This is one of the hardest fucking things i've ever done in my life, but we had to NOT pick her up from the hospital. We're trying to force her family's hand. SOMEONE in her fucking family needs to assume legal guardianship and get her into a nursing home.
HER family is trying to just leave her with us, when they KNOW she's in Alzheimer's territory, because they don't want to take responsibility for her.

It's heartbreaking that we can't take care of her; This is my mom's childhood best friend. I've always been closer to her than any aunt or uncle or grandparent.but she needs to.be in a skilled nursing unit.
Having to...to say that we can't be responsible for her, FUCK.
I woke up sobbing, after being awake for like 60 hours dealing with this.

Edit: 11-27
SUPPOSEDLY her son and daughter in law got her somewhere safe, hopefully long term

[ickyvicky]

@Jinsai i'm so sorry that sounds really traumatizing

[Jinsai]

Arg... this is just... lame

[ickyvicky]

How long have ya'll been together?

[Jinsai]

Too long. I'm just going to do some cleanup here... I feel like airing this stuff, even on a relatively anonymous forum, is contributing to my anxiety.

[allegate]

If you didn't have LA in your location I'd swear you were my brother-in-law as he's going through this as well. I was helping him move out of the house and his girlfriend just went berserk and was yelling and screaming and literally making things up that he's supposed to have done. Gaslighting everyone about everything. And this was in front of their kid who started to get upset at her yelling and she yelled at the BIL for that saying it was his fault.

Swear to God the only thing that kept me from ripping into her was the nephew being there.

Then days later we find out she put a tracker in the baby bag and followed him to Applebee's where she got into another shouting match and punched him, also in front of their son. and, well, Applebee's? but that was probably just a normal Tuesday for them.

I hope you find a way out of the situation that doesn't involve too much more pain on your part.

[sweeterthan]

stop watching the videos. they’re not helping. save them in case you need them but there’s no need to relive them right now. you need to step back and take care of yourself.


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[Swykk]

If this is the same person you’ve mentioned before, you’ve been going through this for a long time. I’m very sorry this is still happening, @Jinsai . I hope you find some peace.

[Jinsai]

it's gotten worse. I thought we could make it work. Maybe I felt that what happened before, what it turned into, was so completely bonkers that it couldn't devolve into that sorta thing again, but yesterday it got so much worse. I'm gonna watch a movie and turn my mind off. I just threw up again. I feel so headfucked.

[ickyvicky]

Does she have any family that you're close with that can try to help her?

[Jinsai]

not really... not in any way I'd feel comfortable talking about on a forum online. I don't know what to do. I'm so depressed.

And I don't mean that to be a loaded or insinuative thing... it's more just, well, at this juncture I'm trying to just stick to a rule of not airing her stuff. It's not my business to be too too open about her things... even though I'm now in a really messed up position really, and it does directly impact my life and what I'm going to do with it in almost every immediate sense. I have to start making some really difficult and big decisions, and I just have no energy.

[ickyvicky]

@Jinsai I totally understand. Hang in there. It's just going to take some time.

[allegro]

not really... not in any way I'd feel comfortable talking about on a forum online. I don't know what to do. I'm so depressed.

And I don't mean that to be a loaded or insinuative thing... it's more just, well, at this juncture I'm trying to just stick to a rule of not airing her stuff. It's not my business to be too too open about her things... even though I'm now in a really messed up position really, and it does directly impact my life and what I'm going to do with it in almost every immediate sense. I have to start making some really difficult and big decisions, and I just have no energy.

This her? Don’t answer. Just think about it.

https://www.businessinsider.com/frie...hopath-2017-12

[Jinsai]

I am not a doc, and out of respect I’ll not get too specific, but it’s related to extreme mood swings.

[darksiren82]

I'm a comic living in Chicago. I have a buddy from a writing group who gave a kinda sketch introduction when he showed me a screenshot of him and another member talking about my curves. Red flag for shadiness but we proceed. He kept things above board for the better part of the year, came to my shows live and virtual, exchanged ideas, showed support. He randomly messaged me a clip of him singing "Stepping Stone" by The Monkees. I said, "Great song, that's a dusty." He replies with 3 videos, the first an angry rant replete with a "fuck you" and the rest increasingly apologetic. I'm a thicker skinned person, a savage onstage, I even win roast battles but value civility in my personal interactions. I messaged him "I'm sorry, I didn't intend it that way." He's in his late 50s but dammit, a song over 50 years old is a "dusty." I'm boiling.

[MrLobster]

He replies with 3 videos, the first an angry rant replete with a "fuck you" and the rest increasingly apologetic.

Yeah, that's all fucked up as a reply to you. Probably good to start putting distance from them...

[elevenism]

We got in a terrible wreck yesterday, and i think i got a pretty bad concussion.
We were Xmas shopping in Amarillo, coming from the mall. The traffic was insane. We were trying to turn left across 3 lanes of traffic, so my wife could use a gas station bathroom.
Cars in two of the lanes waved us across; the third lane looked clear. But as soon as we started to pull across that last lane, I look to my right JUST in time to see one of those big ass redneck pickups in the passenger window. Dude was speeding. I literally thought I was fucking dead.

My head did the JFK thing: snapped to the left, but THEN, violently back to the right. I cracked the window with my damn head and the cracks spread all across the window.

I slept from last night, when we finally got home, until a few hours ago.

My wife is telling me ALL this shit that happened from last night that I absolutely don't remember, including that I was nodding out and that my speech was extremely slurred.
I'm still forgetting words and shit.

Car is not fucking drivable. We don't know when it will be fixed, and we're praying the insurance will pay.
The cop told my wife it could have happened to ANYONE, including HIM, and that it happened all the time at that intersection, and not to feel bad, but that it is technically, legally, our fault.

Which makes this part feel even worse: my mom didn't ask if we were ok or any of that cool shit. She just started screaming at us.

Her friend who came to wait with us for the tow truck and the cops (who took HOURS to arrive, but to me it felt like a few minutes,) told my mom I was apparently really DRUNK, but it WASN'T. I was fucked off from from hitting my head so hard: OTHERWISE I'd have gone to the damn hospital.

My neck and back are all fucked up, too, as are my wife's.

And NOW, we don't have a fucking car, AT ALL, for god knows how long.

So yeah, this is kind of a RUFF xmas.

[chuckrh]

We got in a terrible wreck yesterday, and i think i got a pretty bad concussion.
We were Xmas shopping in Amarillo, coming from the mall. The traffic was insane. We were trying to turn left across 3 lanes of traffic, so my wife could use a gas station bathroom.
Cars in two of the lanes waved us across; the third lane looked clear. But as soon as we started to pull across that last lane, I look to my right JUST in time to see one of those big ass redneck pickups in the passenger window. Dude was speeding. I literally thought I was fucking dead.

My head did the JFK thing: snapped to the left, but THEN, violently back to the right. I cracked the window with my damn head and the cracks spread all across the window.

I slept from last night, when we finally got home, until a few hours ago.

My wife is telling me ALL this shit that happened from last night that I absolutely don't remember, including that I was nodding out and that my speech was extremely slurred.
I'm still forgetting words and shit.

Car is not fucking drivable. We don't know when it will be fixed, and we're praying the insurance will pay.
The cop told my wife it could have happened to ANYONE, including HIM, and that it happened all the time at that intersection, and not to feel bad, but that it is technically, legally, our fault.

Which makes this part feel even worse: my mom didn't ask if we were ok or any of that cool shit. She just started screaming at us.

Her friend who came to wait with us for the tow truck and the cops (who took HOURS to arrive, but to me it felt like a few minutes,) told my mom I was apparently really DRUNK, but it WASN'T. I was fucked off from from hitting my head so hard: OTHERWISE I'd have gone to the damn hospital.

My neck and back are all fucked up, too, as are my wife's.

And NOW, we don't have a fucking car, AT ALL, for god knows how long.

So yeah, this is kind of a RUFF xmas.

Tyler, get well & make sure you (& your wife) are healed. That's most important, the car can wait. You're not alone in the bad Christmas department, prayers up for you & the misses.

[sweeterthan]

sending love to you both.

@elevenism i hope you feel better asap.


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[elevenism]

Thank y'all, seriously.

[marodi]

@elevenism I know it's a bummer about your car and a big inconvenience but it can be replaced. Your life and your wife's cannot.

I'm really sorry this happened to you two. Please consider going to the hospital; concussions are not to be taken lightly.

*hugs*

[elevenism]

@marodi , @sweeterthan , @chuckrh - i don't mean to sound like a crybaby, but thank y'all for caring.

We didn't get ANY of that from my mom- just anger and yelling and such. I get it to a POINT, i mean, it's her car, but good lord. It was an accident that seriously could have happened to anyone.

[elevenism]

Tyler, get well & make sure you (& your wife) are healed. That's most important, the car can wait. You're not alone in the bad Christmas department, prayers up for you & the misses.

and chuck, brotha, i know your christmas isn't going to be a whole hell of a lot of fun, either. Hang in there, man.

I was actually in amarillo to see the rheumatologist myself, before the shopping.

[NotoriousTIMP]

This past week has been a complete blur as I cope with losing my best friend, Yoda. My little dude crossed the rainbow bridge on 12.24.21 at 2:14am. He was surrounded by his family and passed away peacefully (fluid had built up in his chest and burst suddenly without warning. Vet said there was nothing I could have done differently as the damage was already done.) Yoda came into my life when I was dealing with a very messy break up from my ex-fiance. Shortly after that my father and grandfather both passed away within a month of each other followed by my mother having a stress related heart attack a month after that. Needless to say, 2014 was a very dim/rough year for me and Yoda was the only thing allowing me to function somewhat normal. Fast forward to today and I feel numb towards everything and everyone. Grieving sucks, there is no doubt about it, but I'm trying to find the positive here and I keep coming up short. I would give anything to spend just another 10 minutes with my little guy.....I feel so lost now that I don't know what to do next.

[elevenism]

I'm so, so sorry @NotoriousTIMP . that brings a damn tear to my eye, seriously.
I lost my beloved American Bulldog, Spike, on his eleventh birthday, in march. He was absolutely my best friend. It HURTS, and your pain sounds a hell of a lot like mine. There's no way around it. It WILL get easier, though. It takes time. I still cry sometimes.

[Swykk]

Very sorry for your loss. They’re family.

[chuckrh]

sorry for your loss

[ickyvicky]

So sorry to hear that :-(

[marodi]

@NotoriousTIMP I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Erneuert]

This past week has been a complete blur as I cope with losing my best friend, Yoda. My little dude crossed the rainbow bridge on 12.24.21 at 2:14am. He was surrounded by his family and passed away peacefully (fluid had built up in his chest and burst suddenly without warning. Vet said there was nothing I could have done differently as the damage was already done.) Yoda came into my life when I was dealing with a very messy break up from my ex-fiance. Shortly after that my father and grandfather both passed away within a month of each other followed by my mother having a stress related heart attack a month after that. Needless to say, 2014 was a very dim/rough year for me and Yoda was the only thing allowing me to function somewhat normal. Fast forward to today and I feel numb towards everything and everyone. Grieving sucks, there is no doubt about it, but I'm trying to find the positive here and I keep coming up short. I would give anything to spend just another 10 minutes with my little guy.....I feel so lost now that I don't know what to do next.

Incredibly sorry for your loss. I posted this same song previously for someone else who lost one of their little fur babies. Ironically, Gary uses the lyric “bridge over rainbows” and that’s the same phrasing you used. So bittersweet. Animals’ lives - especially those of domestic pets — ought to be way longer than what they’re given. Then you look at the giant tortoise and certain other creatures that can just go on for decades and decades: