Well, I'm not taking it seriously that, no, I do not think that you think the average man processes being groped unwanted in an equivalent way to being handed shoes.

I *am* taking it seriously in the sense that, that mentality or the expectation of that mentality from men, is commonplace. And the fact that it is commonplace is sad and harmful.

While you may have framed it in a way that was attempted to be humorous, I don't think my response is any more literal than your initial comment, which while it did contain a joke, does illustrate a line of thinking that is problematic and pervasive.