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Faceplams: Truly sorry for your loss, Khrz.
Throbbing Member
Truly sorry for your loss, Khrz.
Dis-member
So sorry to hear Khrz, thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
Stubby Member
So sorry for your loss khrz, condolences to you and your family
FATUM NOS IUNGET
@Khrz May your family find peace and comfort. So sorry to hear.
Bite me
I was nobody. Nothing.
Goddamn @Khrz i'm so fucking sorry man.
it would fucking KILL me to lose my little bro.
i can't imagine
Last edited by elevenism; 11-14-2015 at 07:17 PM.
Active Member
I don't even know where to start. When this was all happening I was working at a concert myself, checking in with a number of friends who are in Paris and were supposed to be working shows today (including Bataclan). And I was actually in my brother's city, so he came to see me at the gig and was with me when all of this started happening. The day before that I was lucky enough to have a day off and see one of our favorite bands with him, and appreciating how lucky I am to have a sibling I get along with and can do things like that with.Originally Posted by Khrz
I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through. I won't pretend for a second that I could wrap my head around it. My absolute deepest condolences. I'm not the praying type, but I'm keeping you and your family in my thoughts tonight.
Flaccid Member
@Khrz My deepest condolences for your loss. I'm glad you are safe at least. I send much love to you and your family during this time.
Active Member
Me too. @Khrz , I join everyone else in expressing my sorrow for you and your family.
Active Member
I'm so sorry to hear that @Khrz
I hope all of our condolences can bring you even the slightest bit of light right now. You're one of us and we're all here for you
House Always Wins
Couldnt have said it better myself.
sorry to hear this news @Khrz
tempus est umbra in mente
god @Khrz , I'm so sorry. Please take care. I can't imagine what you're going through, and I'm so sorry.
I was nobody. Nothing.
I can't stop thinking about you @Khrz and i think that goes for a lot of us here.
We are with you.
I'm sending you love and light from the great high plains of Texas
Throbbing Member
@Khrz , we've never interacted online here, as I'm largely a lurker and only pop up from time-to-time when I feel like there's something I need to say. And I feel like there are a lot of people like me who read ets every day and, just by reading, get to know the different characters who inhabit this little corner of the internet. I guess like in real life, there are those of us who are around, but who maybe don't speak up much. But like I said, just by reading ets, I feel like I've gotten to know, to a degree, a great many of the folks around here. And even though we've never interacted @Khrz , I feel like this tragedy has touched someone I know. And that hurts. It hurts me, so I can't begin to imagine what it is you're going through, or what pain you're feeling. But I feel like you need to know that there are many, many people here to whom you've never spoken who wish you positivity, friendship and strength.
As you can see above, your loss has deeply impacted the community here; take some comfort in the fact that there are a great number of people on ets on whom you can lean. Know that we support you and care for you, mate.
My sincerest condolences.
Member
@Khrz - I am deeply sorry for your loss. What happened wasn't right. I just hope this stupid atrocity doesn't stop you from going to shows. My deepest condolences.
Active Member
Fantastic idea! Cc @orestes
Active Member
So, I've made this thread real awkward !
Turns out logging out is easier said than done. I need stuff to "entertain" my brain or it becomes a train wreck in there. And I found out that I can put up with commentaries just fine because I really couldn't care less. So, yay for emotional apathy I guess !
It still doesn't compute to be honest, he's not yet missing from my life, and I try not to think too hard about it. We're going to identify the body once all the forensic procedures are over. I dread that, but I really need it.
There is nothing you can do guys. As far as I'm concerned, you're hitting the glass ceiling of awesome. Let's face it, you have no business helping us with my brother's funerals, or even sending flowers. I really, really appreciate the thought, I'm deeply touched, but that would just be plain weird for all parties involved.
There's a long serie of heartfelt saccharine clichés ahead, let me lead that parade : If you want to do something, do something with your loved ones. Fire the XBox up, argue over a game of Catan, plan Christmas, whatever. Watch the stars and discuss about unanswerable shit, learn more about what they love, what they care about. It's never enough.
If the loss I suffered affects you, if you're touched by the distress of a guy on a NIN forum, then imagine what it could be for you and enjoy your people as much as you can. If you feel inspired to do something, do something that matters around you.
I'm still not answering the PMs ; I'm not ignoring them, but I still don't know what to say. Thank you guys.
Active Member
Those in the UK : people are trying to get Save a Prayer by EODM to number 1 in the charts this week. Buy it!
I was nobody. Nothing.
Jesus man, it's not your fault!
Active Member
An equally awkward attempt at humor @elevenism , pay no mind, I don't function quite right.
I was nobody. Nothing.
i wouldn't be functioning right either man. I'm thinking of you, and like i said, i would imagine that most of us who spend a lot of time here are.
i'm so fucking sorry man.
if you want or need to talk, i'm Tyler Jackson Lankford on facebook
Last edited by elevenism; 11-15-2015 at 04:50 AM.
The Virus Inside
Exactly! I was ready to reply with the exact same thing.
Don't feel weird about any of this. You were brave enough to let out something as personal like this out on a random message board full of people you don't know.
The thing is, a lot of us may not know you directly in person, but we have interacted with you one way or another over the years over these forums.
I'm not always as open to people about personal stuff, even online I find it hard to express myself sometimes. There is still that fear of "will anyone even care? This doesn't affect anyone else, why would I want to pour my heart out for a bunch of random people I have never met" there is also that fear of posting or sharing your deepest or darkest emotional secrets (or embarrassments) online in fear of being laughed at or ridiculed. But I think it's quite clear that we are not the type of people to judge you in a case like this. It's not going to be easy, but we're glad you were brave enough to at least come here and share this very personal information with us. We kinda feel honored that you were ready to even share this information with us, so that kinda counts for something. So don't feel weird about any of it, at all.
I know we're a bunch of random strangers on a web forum, but we're here for you if you need us. And if you wanna take some time off to be with yourself or your family during this time, by all means, do what's right for you man. We'll be waiting for you, just don't feel bad about letting us know. This is something very personal, and it's going to take time.
Active Member
Thanks man, actually I'm starting to stay away from Facebook or Twitter. My brother's chat icon is still there, there are remote family members who may have seen him once in their life starting to make it about them, and random strangers claiming they saw him alive and well on TV. His pic has been relayed to hell and back and there's a really weird reclamation thing going on.i wouldn't be functioning right either man. I'm thinking of you, and like i said, i would imagine that most of us who spend a lot of time here are.
i'm so fucking sorry man.
if you want or need to talk, i'm Tyler Jackson Lankford on facebook
Yeah, I don't actually think there is any bravery in this. First of all I felt obligated to acknowledge your concerns and your support, wouldn't have felt right to just ignore that. But more than anything, when something like that happens, you just have to spit it out, spill it out. First thing I did was calling my ex, who knew him well, and is a close friend of his girlfriend. That gave me a great pretext, but I know I would have called her anyway. I just had to spill my guts. It actually helped because that was the first time I actually cried about it.
Last edited by Khrz; 11-15-2015 at 05:18 AM.
I was nobody. Nothing.
I just can't imagine. I have a brother who is 19 months younger than me and i just can't fucking imagine. And there aren't words to tell you how sorry i am.
I have lost a lot of friends but i've never suffered a loss like this. And goddamnit, we are supposed to suffer such losses when we are old and sick, not in the prime of our lives.
And it's a strange thing, but i don't feel like we are "a bunch of random strangers." Somehow, I feel like we are pretty tightly knit around here.
And we are all going to be here for you.
Last edited by elevenism; 11-15-2015 at 05:27 AM.
Active Member
Imagine my parents, who thought they'd already be dead and happily buried way before any of their kids would kick it. Fuck, I don't even know if my grandmother is going to make it. This year only she's lost a son, a sister and a grand-kid. There's just so much you can take before you just let go...
I was nobody. Nothing.
YOU'RE gonna make it though, right?
it would be hard for me. i have a history with heroin and rampant alcoholism, and i would probably be right back on that shit
Last edited by elevenism; 11-15-2015 at 05:39 AM.
Active Member
So sorry for your loss. Condolences to you and your family. I don't know what to say .
Active Member
Found out I'm much less of a grief alcoholic than I would have thought. Somehow it doesn't fit right with my reasons for mourning. Antoine would fucking bitchslap me if I started to get drunk to cope. Similarly, getting high while my brother is dead just doesn't seem fitting.YOU'RE gonna make it though, right?
it would be hard for me. i have a history with heroin and rampant alcoholism, and i would probably be right back on that shit
Yeah, I'll make it through. I have absolutely no idea of the man I'll be once I'm through, but I'll make it.
Active Member
I understand and respect that. Hell, I sympathize.
I have friends all over the country, and beyond, who feel utterly, devastatingly helpless right now. I keep telling them that it's okay, I know they're here, I feel them there.
Look at this fucking thread. You're helping. You're all accompanying me right now in a time of need. How fucking many of you are there, that's incredible.
But the thing is, I'm not the only one involved. There's my family, the future mother of my nephew (because hey, let's make it even worse) and her family. I mentioned this to them, and although they were extremely grateful, they wouldn't understand any "action".
It's hard to explain, but it's a deeply personal loss on a massive scale. It's too big for us, and we're tying to keep it little, because that's our measure. There will certainly be an official ceremony, which we won't attend, for instance. Any gesture on your part would make it bigger. I don't know if I'm making sense. We welcome the thoughts, the love, we're so, so grateful, and we send love back. As much as we can. But amidst a serie of tragedies all over this fucking world, we're simple people, just trying to bring our loved one home and say our goodbyes one last time.
24.24.2.2866
I was absolutely dreading to hear any word of loss from anyone on this board regarding this horrible attack.. I can't believe what has happened @Khrz
This world is so fucked up, really makes me sick but whatever I'm feeling isn't really important, there's no way it could compare to what you're going through. All i can say is i wish none of this had happened, i am so sorry man. To you and your family, you have my best.
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