The Mental Health thread - depression, bipolar, ADHD, you name it

[[parasite]]

hey all, does anyone have Borderline Personality Disorder? i’ve been diagnosed for a good while now, and been on quite a few different medications. i’m currently taking

Lamotrigine 400mg
Mirtazapine 45mg

Lorazepam when required

and was put on Aripiprazole again a month or so back, but this time it made me feel really fucked, previously i’ve had Quetiapine, Olanzapine and a few others.
Buspirone makes me really ill, i ended up in hospital. because it wasn’t leaving my system in between doses, it was just building up and up.

been having a bit of a bad time, really disordered thinking, paranoia, concentration, main bpd things and cutting, that’s becoming a daily ritual i actually look forward to when i can do it and people problems, being triggered on purposely.

i’m trying to deal with it all myself, as i usually try first, then things come crashing down and i have no choice other than to seek help.

so basically what i wanted to know, if anyone has borderline personality disorder, what medication are they on or what have they tried?


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[Jon]

i’m trying to deal with it all myself, as i usually try first, then things come crashing down and i have no choice other than to seek help.

so basically what i wanted to know, if anyone has borderline personality disorder, what medication are they on or what have they tried?

There is no reason you should have to deal with this yourself. Please let your psychiatrist and psychologist know about these negative feedback loops you're experiencing. We are (truly) our own worse enemy in these cases.

I live with someone that currently takes buspirone, olanzipine, and guanificine. They have been on a combination of (most) medications you listed. So far, so good (going on 6 months). The doctors have made it clear that the next step, if needed, is lithium.

Another person I live with takes divalproex (a tetracyclic), citalopram, and clonazepam (as needed). They swear by the divalproex and switching from lorazepam to clonazepam. They have not had their medications changed in (going on) 10 years.

These are just ideas to help facilitate a conversation between you and your chosen professionals. Even with the best of intentions, I am still just an Internet rando. Sending "level" thoughts your way...

[[parasite]]

There is no reason you should have to deal with this yourself. Please let your psychiatrist and psychologist know about these negative feedback loops you're experiencing. We are (truly) our own worse enemy in these cases.

I live with someone that currently takes buspirone, olanzipine, and guanificine. They have been on a combination of (most) medications you listed. So far, so good (going on 6 months). The doctors have made it clear that the next step, if needed, is lithium.

Another person I live with takes divalproex (a tetracyclic), citalopram, and clonazepam (as needed). They swear by the divalproex and switching from lorazepam to clonazepam. They have not had their medications changed in (going on) 10 years.

These are just ideas to help facilitate a conversation between you and your chosen professionals. Even with the best of intentions, I am still just an Internet rando. Sending "level" thoughts your way...

hey, that all great advice, thank you for your reply, it’s appreciated


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[[parasite]]

ok so i’ve had my Aripiprazole upped, so fingers crossed it helps


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[Serene Nymph]

I was improving with my counselor in just about everything- functionality, motivation, relationships, and expression, but I wanted to get more energy like I did with Adderall because I could never touch anything too sugary without feeling bloated and dizzy.

I go to the psychiatrist who first prescribed it and all she did was shrug her shoulders and say "I don't prescribe Adderall anymore" She didn't say it very nicely either. Partly the reason is because I live in a state where people too often abuse it ruining prescriptions for people like me.

So basically I was denied an ingredient that isn't paramount but still quite necessary to my functionality. You can't have figurative cake without figurative frosting. (Weird, I'm ironically using a sugar metaphor).

I don't feeling like starting a new medication though when that one worked with no side effects! Other than that, I've been feeling great, yet meanwhile distracted by my phone and drowsy.
If that could be fixed along with global warming and our government, Life would be PERFECT!

[poinoup]

I've been taken off Sertraline this current refill. I still have a fair bit of meds to take though. It has to be done, I've been in a pretty good place this last little while.

I was out at the family farm last week, and my "anger" at certain things was more of a "Well, drats." I think I just needed a few days away from the city, and enjoy the silence (I know) out there.

[Erneuert]

Magic Mushrooms May Be the Biggest Advance in Treating Depression Since Prozac

https://www.newsweek.com/2021/10/01/magic-mushrooms-may-biggest-advance-treating-depression-since-prozac-1631225.html%3famp=1

[Magnetic]

Magic Mushrooms May Be the Biggest Advance in Treating Depression Since Prozac


https://www.newsweek.com/2021/10/01/magic-mushrooms-may-biggest-advance-treating-depression-since-prozac-1631225.html%3famp=1

Unfortunately it won't be available to the public until there's a way to monetize it. It isn't a good business model, if 3-4 treatments over a few months cures, when people can be on antidepressants forever. The problem is that for policy to change, we need a LOT of data and research, but that costs money, so funding is going to be an issue. I was psyched when this research was buzzing around circa 2010 - I was actually living in Baltimore/ working at Johns Hopkins in a different department and interacted with a few research assistants involved.

That said....obtaining this material is possible. My degree in microbiology has paid off.

[[parasite]]

so coming off of 20mg Aripiprazole, causing bad anxiety, now i’m gonna be testing Risperidone, not sure what the dose will be yet…
fingers crossed


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[Magnetic]

I wish I could turn the switch off in my brain that drives me to be an overachiever. I guess it's me still trying to overcompensate for the years I wasn't in school/ wasn't working towards my career. In my early 20s I rebelled a lot - left school, did a lot of drugs, and laughed my ass off. And I can remember feeling guilty during all of that that I wasn't "advancing" my life.

I managed to change careers during the pandemic, learning everything 100% remotely, and I'm crushing it at my job. And yet.... Fuck imposter syndrome.

[allegate]

The past...weeks? months? I don't know...anyway...the past bit of time has been difficult as everything seems to be falling apart at the same time it's going well for me. I've been working in this new position only two weeks but the projects have been on my plate for longer than that. That's all going great, my boss even said "I love how when I get a new person I have to say "now pick something" but you're already on it and it's a doozy but you're kicking butt already" so that's great, yay.

The issue is that my son has decided that everything sucks and that he'd rather jet off the Japan to meet a person he only knows online and live there for awhile. That's the plan, I didn't miss a step at all. no prospects, no idea of "hey I'm only a junior in high school", nothing. It's gotten to where I think my relationship with him has soured to the point of "well if you don't want to spend time with us I don't want to spend time with you" and it hurts. I have had a very close relationship with him but all of this is getting to be too much. If I have to check his homework every night and see that it's not done - I don't care that it's not due until 11:55 PM - and his response is always cantankerous then I guess I have to stop caring. and I've never been good at compartmentalizing emotions. Like, at all.

And then there's the general malaise of how I'm the only one at work on my side of the building. I was supposed to be moving to a more middle area but I was just told by someone that that office is being filled but not by me. So I guess I'm still the odd man out? I mean it's not like we can move to a bigger house at this point. Not even considering the market the house is ~3 years from being paid off.

[Pillfred]

I’ve been thinking about the Chester video of him playing happy the couple days before he died, as well as Bourdain having the perfect job so it must be a “conspiracy” nonsense. People don’t understand that seemingly “good” times can be the worst.

[[parasite]]

so started Depakote on Friday, anyone else on this?


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[ickyvicky]

My father committed suicide last week. It's been rough.

[[parasite]]

My father committed suicide last week. It's been rough.

oh no, sorry sorry for your loss.
we are here if you need a chat or as much support as we can give you, our thoughts are with you


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[stankeybearlover]

I'm kinda losing it. Trying to keep it together, to keep my composure. I just found out that my girlfriend of 6 years for whom I have sacrificed far more than anyone should for anyone who isnt their child has most likely been cheating on me since the pandemic hit.

ive torn shit up. gotta repaint the walls soon

[allegro]

My father committed suicide last week. It's been rough.

Oh no. I’m so sorry.

[Swykk]

I’m sorry to hear this @ickyvicky

[chuckrh]

My father committed suicide last week. It's been rough.

I'm sorry for your loss

[ickyvicky]

Thank you @chuckrh

What I don't understand is his death certificate is not ready yet, and it's been a little over 2 weeks now. Is it because of the nature of his death? They've already cremated him.

I'm still having trouble sleeping and have nightmares. Being back at work and keeping busy has helped somewhat, but by the time I get home and it's time to go to bed - I totally freak out.

[allegate]

My father committed suicide last week. It's been rough.

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. I can't even imagine what that's like for you and I can hope that you can find some good support services right now without social distancing mucking things up too much.

[kel]

sending you the best of energies, i am so sorry for your loss.

[allegro]

Thank you @chuckrh

What I don't understand is his death certificate is not ready yet, and it's been a little over 2 weeks now. Is it because of the nature of his death? They've already cremated him.

I used to work in a funeral home. The death certificate must be signed by a doctor who handled your father’s death. That can take a while for the funeral home (place handling cremation) to obtain, typically days. I couldn’t believe how hard it was to chase these doctors down for a signature. No, it has nothing to do with how your father died.

Also, it could be further delayed because the funeral directors haven’t gone to pick up the death certificates, yet.

Stay on their backs. The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Sending hugs to you. Don’t be afraid to go talk with someone, get some help dealing with this, ok? It’s a LOT.

[chuckrh]

Thank you @chuckrh

What I don't understand is his death certificate is not ready yet, and it's been a little over 2 weeks now. Is it because of the nature of his death? They've already cremated him.

I'm still having trouble sleeping and have nightmares. Being back at work and keeping busy has helped somewhat, but by the time I get home and it's time to go to bed - I totally freak out.

Hang in there. I know this will be a rough holiday season for you. Holler if there is anything I (or others) can do to help. BTW: I have depression issues during the holidays under normal conditions. This has been a brutal year on the health front on top of the usual. I'm getting a shot in the spine (2nd one in a month) today. What I really need is spinal fusion surgery which is a total crapshoot. & with the other health issues, there's a good chance it would kill me. Hoping the shot buys me some time. I have a high pain tolerance from the RA but now it's excruciating part of the time. I feel like I'm swirling around the drain. Take care of you & your family, you are in my prayers.

[ickyvicky]

@allegro Thanks for the info. They're finally ready now. Going to pick them up on Friday.

A friend of mine told me I should start taking melatonin to help me to sleep. I've been trying Benadryl (it usually knocks me out) but it hasn't been working. My husband has been sharing his clonazepam with me, it worked somewhat - but like last night I still woke up after 2 hours of sleeping.
@chuckrh Thanksgiving was rough, I broke down before we started dinner. Who the hell knows what Christmas is going to be like, ha. :-P

[Magnetic]

@allegro Thanks for the info. They're finally ready now. Going to pick them up on Friday.

A friend of mine told me I should start taking melatonin to help me to sleep. I've been trying Benadryl (it usually knocks me out) but it hasn't been working. My husband has been sharing his clonazepam with me, it worked somewhat - but like last night I still woke up after 2 hours of sleeping.
@chuckrh Thanksgiving was rough, I broke down before we started dinner. Who the hell knows what Christmas is going to be like, ha. :-P

I have found that cannabis helps a lot with my insomnia. It's been a life-saver.

[allegro]

@ickyvicky - Perhaps talk with your primary physician about what you’re going through right now? They can prescribe something like an SSRI that can help with both anxiety and sleep. Lexipro helped both my Mom and Mother-in-Law a great deal when they were really struggling with grief. What you’re experiencing is all normal grieving, but you do need to catch up on your sleep schedule without screwing up your REM sleep. Sleep deprivation can really start messing with you. Melatonin is known to cause nightmares in many people. Add in the stress and additional grief issues of the holidays … it would be a good idea to see your doctor as soon as possible?

Hugs to you.

[Jinsai]

Jesus, @ickyvicky , incredibly sorry. I hope you have some supportive, close people who can be with you here and hear you out

[ickyvicky]

What was one of the most fucked up things when this first all happened was he wrote a public Facebook post saying goodbye, and then everyone started commenting innappropriate things. Luckily my best friend came in and told everyone to shut the fuck up and then everyone started deleting their comments. I'm trying to delete his Facebook acount, but Facebook wants fucking proof that he's dead. They want a copy of his death certificate or orbituary. I'm like what the fuck, who the fuck do you think you are - the government or something? (Well, they techinically are, lmao *smh* ugh! ) But that's why I was freaking out why it's taking the funeral home so long with the death certificates because I want his page down and not have to continue to monitor in case some asshole wants to write something again.

So FYI for all ya'll in case a love one dies - try to figure out their email and password for their Facebook page ahead of time.

[Erneuert]

So sorry for your loss Vicky.