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Thread: The Mental Health thread - depression, bipolar, ADHD, you name it

  1. #721
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    Pretty depressed today. I guess the bright side of this (as I currently feel like shit) is that depression happens rarely enough for me that it throws me off, when it does. So that's something to be grateful for, once I get past feeling miserable and full of self-loathing and I'm not sure why I do, if I fucked up taking my pill (hormonal bc) or what, but ugh.

  2. #722
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    I'm running into a giant black hole of wild depression... I watch commercials and feel like I'm going to break down crying... Everything is awful... Everything is convincing, everything is hopeless. Nothing feels subtle or nuanced. Everything feels overblown and mundane. It feels like nothing could ever be good or bad again. I feel like I'm getting through constant contradictions... I feel pestered and nagged but lonely, exhausted. Fucking exhausted.

  3. #723
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    So this girl I've been texting from Tinder told me today she OD'd because well, life is shit. I called the cops. I can't help but feel responsible since this was hours after I broke our date.

  4. #724
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    This summer my anxiety has been off the charts.
    I really need some me time, some alone time, to recharge and find myself again, and I'm not getting it, and I'm paying the price.

  5. #725
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    not even sure if this is the right place to put this... But I've had some borderline manic episodes lately. Nothing awful or dangerous or fucked up, just breaking down and hysterically feeling like "all is lost." One second, everything is alright and I'm happy, or at least not miserable, and then I get hit by something insane... Suddenly I find myself crying. It's been happening out of nowhere, and so I understand how it's disconcerting to a friendly conversation.... suddenly, I'll look like (as someone explained it to me) I had a gun pointed to my head and "I was ok with it," and start crying. How this has spilled over into my professional connections is unfortunate, and that doesn't help. It's really rare, but when it hits, it's terrifying and very hard to explain...

    I wonder some times if my close friends are having their patience tried, and maybe I'm not trying hard enough. I've tried the drugs. They don't work, or they work for a limited time, and then backfire. I really wish I could find a drug that fixed this. It's just getting worse and worse.

  6. #726
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    I'm just now climbing my way out of hell, depression . Maybe the worst depression I have ever had, and that's saying a lot. I know this is a super cliche thing to say but I promise at some point it will pass. Last year I was asking my friend after 6 months of my depression " do you think this is ever going pass, I literally can't work right now " of course as a friend he states of " of course, everything changes " . I was back and forth with my doctor the whole 6 months and the medication that helped my anxiety was Amitriptyline. So at that point my anxiety is good and my depression was a little better but I was still feeling like a 3/10 in depression. My doctor decides to test my blood testosterone and it comes back as the test couldn't even register any testosterone in my blood. I took it for 2 weeks and I feel back to my baseline- 7/10, I will take that.

    I know this may not be the answer for you but I have been through many dark times in my life and every time I was able to claw my way out and it will be the same for you too, just keep going forward and keep checking in with your Dr. Stay around the people that love you and give your self a break from the stress, if you need to. I had to take a couple months off of work and that really helped too. Do what you got to do and lean on the people you have in your life .

  7. #727
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    yeah, sometimes it gets so bad it goes beyond mental... like it actually becomes physically unpleasant and I get the energy sucked out of me. Yesterday morning I tried to push back against that, so I woke up early, went jogging, then went swimming, push ups, tried to stay busy working on music, and I woke up today feeling like I'd been hit by a bus.

  8. #728
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    @Jinsai , the same thing has happened to me, it comes out of nowhere, thoughts that dying wouldn't be so bad, sobbing jags, and it can happen when there's really nothing terrible in my life; I mean, in comparison to others out there, I had a lot for which to be grateful; I've chalked it up to a chemical imbalance, and oddly enough I've learned that accepting it, rolling with it (safely, rejecting the dying part), feeling it like a need to just PURGE everything out of my pores, seems to work, and then *POOF* it just passes. It's like one day you wake up and ... it's gone. Like a mental douche. It seems that rejecting it only made it worse for me, but I still had to *function*, but like @Rdm said, I cleared out some stress, limited my schedule as much as possible, allowed my feelings to just "happen," and I spent a lot of time SLEEPING (that seemed to help a lot too) and then I guess my psyche had enough of all that and I literally woke up one day and it was gone. I'm sending some positive vibes your way ...

    The analogy of the feelings I had at the time was that I was floating in a boat with no oars, just lying in this boat, with no oars, no direction, no idea where I would land, where I was going, just totally lost, and floating, and like everything was totally fucking pointless and if you looked up the word "despair" in the dictionary, I felt every part of it. Full and utter despair. And, worse yet, like nobody around me "got it" except may this one cat I have who would come up and lick my face when I cried.

    The last time it happened, though, I did a lot of thinking about it and I think I had a lot of things going on that I hadn't really thought about, a lot more pressure on myself than I could handle, changes in my life that I needed to make, juggling stuff, unhappy aspects of my career and life, decisions I needed to make ... and had not realized it but I think my psyche DID and I think it sent up a white flag and that sobbing depressed jag was the white flag? Dunno, but it led to some big changes.
    Last edited by allegro; 08-14-2016 at 03:20 PM.

  9. #729
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    Quote Originally Posted by allegro View Post
    @Jinsai, the same thing has happened to me, it comes out of nowhere, thoughts that dying wouldn't be so bad, sobbing jags, and it can happen when there's really nothing terrible in my life; I mean, in comparison to others out there, I had a lot for which to be grateful; I've chalked it up to a chemical imbalance, and oddly enough I've learned that accepting it,
    yeah, when it's all chemical I have tricks to get through it... My best one is to throw on a song that you'd feel ridiculous moping to... Something really ridiculous and maudlin, like Total Eclipse of the Heart or the theme song to the Karate Kid part 2.

    Doesnt work if if the whole thing is compounded by real drama and stress though...

  10. #730
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jinsai View Post
    yeah, when it's all chemical I have tricks to get through it... My best one is to throw on a song that you'd feel ridiculous moping to... Something really ridiculous and maudlin, like Total Eclipse of the Heart or the theme song to the Karate Kid part 2.
    YES!! I once listened to maudlin Frank Sinatra albums for, like, 3 whole days. Like, "Frank Sinatra Sings for Only the Lonely" and "In the Wee Small Hours."

    Like, I must've played this 50x:



    But, yeah, mine was complicated by stress, too. I didn't REALIZE how much stress until I really thought about it. I have always been inundated with stress, but people always say "oh, she can handle it" and then they're disappointed in me if it seems like I'm ripping at the seams and I can't. When I told my Mom I was full of this despair, she said "you're not gonna drop out of school, are you?!" Oh, no, of course not, I'm the overachiever, remember? I'll graduate Magna Cum Laude with a gun to my head! Thanks for your "concern" though. (eye roll)

    And then I just keep truckin' on through it. Through the depression, too. It too shall pass, that's my motto.

    Anyway, I hope you feel better soon.
    Last edited by allegro; 08-14-2016 at 07:42 PM.

  11. #731
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    it all passes, I've been feeling better... Despite lunatic horseshit going on in my personal sphere that I'm sure wouldn't benefit my mental state to share here. It's a perfect storm when stress gets the best of you, and you fall into a depressive cycle, and then some really bad shit happens. On some level, I have to wonder if training yourself to just block all of that out is an idiot's guide to becoming a sociopath... It's best when you recognize the real aspects that make it so bad to give it special attention.

    When I'm dealing with some heavy shit, where it's not just me upset, but everyone around me... ok, here we are again... but this time, I can't just dodge out and watch the "You could be a man!" scene from Godfather while listening to Lisa Loeb's "stay" (which has smacked me right out of so many depressive funks... worst. song. ever)..

    I'm feeling better, though today I'm beat. I worked 10 hours today (if you count driving) in the sun, with interludes doing heavy physical labor. Right now, I'm lying in front of the TV, treating a deep gash wound on my leg with hydrogen peroxide and neosporin, and trying to figure out how to distract myself.... and nothing stupid seems right. That's the weird gambit when I'm noticing that I'm in a mode that's "sensitive" to upsetting shit... I can't watch something super bleak, as much as I want to watch the new episode of "The Night Of."

    Living in my head is, generally, a miserable place. I need to get better at running away from that in general.

  12. #732
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    Edit--And as things fell apart, nobody paid much attention....
    Last edited by Swykk; 08-17-2016 at 07:36 AM.

  13. #733
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    When you've been overwhelmed with things to do for a long time, and neglected to check in on yourself, and suddenly it all comes crashing at you.

  14. #734
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    I’m not normally one to post personal thoughts on various challenges I face. However, in this instance, I’m making an exception. This last year has been a tough one: My struggle with depression and an anxiety disorder led me to isolate myself. It got so bad that I rarely left the house save for the random errand or doctor’s appointment. I literally went weeks without seeing the sun, trapped in my four-walled world. It is a terrible thing to be a prisoner of one’s own mind. Further, it's amazing how one week can turn into a year if you let it. Well, last Friday that all changed: I made the effort to break out of this cell and starting living, again. So, with that, I made the 2 hour trek to San Francisco to see a band I had wanted to see for years: Health. The irony of their name is not lost on me. The drive was quite a struggle and I thought of quitting my journey and heading back to my room several times in those 2 hours. But, instead, I pushed through. As a result, I met some really cool guys and shared one of the best concert experiences of my life. I’ve still got a lot of work to do, but, I took the most important step: The first one. So, not only did I make a great memory, but, I also proved something to myself. I can now build on it and, when I feel anxious, remember that things turned out well when I pushed past my mental issues. So, for those struggling with their own mental health issues, I strongly encourage you to seek professional help. Fuck the stigma society puts on it; it’s a health issue and should be treated accordingly. Further, for those already receiving professional treatment, I encourage you to keep pushing through and live the life you hope to lead. I know it’s not easy, but, it’s fucking worth it. So, thanks for reading this; I hope it helps those of you who face these challenges. I’m pulling for you; be well.

  15. #735
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    i have fallen into a fucking black hole y'all.
    i feel worthless. i feel like my life is pretty much over.
    i had a kind of breakdown a couple of nights ago where i talked about suicide and scared the shit out of everybody.

    I will not kill myself, but y'all, i am fucking broken.

    I no longer feel joy. I do not make music.

    I have to find a way out of this. One obvious problem is that i have been missing a lot of medication doses. I am taking them right at this time though. Perhaps i can rise above this bullshit.

    I think i need a lecture from you @allegro ;P
    Last edited by elevenism; 11-11-2016 at 10:08 PM.

  16. #736
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    I have to work on letting go and that some things can't be fixed and don't deserve my time and effort, as it's not valued and doesn't end up mattering. I should instead spend this on more positive endeavors. I get so sucked into fixing things, often things that it ends up dragging me down into a very negative space. I have a bad habit of letting the wrong people affect me. So additionally, I need to give myself a break and be kinder to myself. I don't have the level of esteem and confidence most people have and I think this is what allows this negative cycle to continue. This entire month has been a terrible one as far as I've had numerous panic attacks, the most since 2010 when my ex cheated on me and filed for divorce.
    Lots to figure out here but I will continue to get better.
    Last edited by Swykk; 11-27-2016 at 07:22 PM.

  17. #737
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swykk View Post
    I don't have the level of esteem and confidence most people have and I think this is what allows this negative cycle to continue. This entire month has been a terrible one as far as I've had numerous panic attacks
    I FEEL you, @Swykk . We are in the famous proverbial Same Boat.

  18. #738
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    last night, i had the worst panic attack i've had in YEARS. my arms/hands were doing repetitive motions that i could not control, i could barely breathe except for when i was bawling, i couldn't talk, i couldn't move my legs. it was horrible and terrifying and it's the first time my wife has ever witnessed me like that. but, seriously, thank goodness she was there, because i don't know what would have happened otherwise.

    i don't know what the actual root cause was, but it started because we changed our dinner plans. we were originally going to make veggie burgers and sweet potato, but there were a ton of dishes and we were both exhausted, so we decided to order something in. it took 45 minutes to finally settle on domino's pizza (we have it very rarely as a special treat), and by the time we tried to complete our order, they had stopped doing delivery because of the snow. at that point, i just started crying and that led into my panic attack, which lasted a full 30 minutes.

    i recovered and managed to eat (we had frozen pizza) and not lapse back into it, but i can still feel it humming under my skin. it probably didn't help that i had a hyper-realistic dream about my abusive ex forcing me into a sexual situation and just not sleeping well in general. feeling very fragile today.

  19. #739
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    Hiya. I used to be around here a lot and those who've known me over the years have seen me drop in and out. I have had a very physically and emotionally erratic life and I always thought it was due to growing up in a military family, moving around every 2 years. But in early Spring 2016, I had a total mental health breakdown and was diagnosed with Bipolar I rapid cycling, PTSD and Dermatillomania. Turns out I had been on medication for depression that was actually making me experience more mania. Now, 9 months later, I am still trying to nail down my best medication mix. I also have taken on the torch of mental health advocacy and destigmatization. Losing Carrie Fisher yesterday was especially terrible because when I found out I had Bipolar, I viewed her as a hero and proof that success with this mental disorder is possible. Anyways, I am here if anyone needs an ear.

    -Karla

  20. #740
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    @ninEater , thank you for your post.

    i was diagnosed with bipolar II when i was 29 (7 years ago). i've read up on and done tons of research on hypomania and the difference in bp types, but i still don't fully get it. i only get *up* episodes like once a year. the *down* shit never seems to cease. you seem like you know your shit. is this normal? my doctor says yes, but i don't see how that makes for a functional adulthood.

    edit: and i've now been on quietiapine for just as long. nothing else. i've been on a ton of others, benzos and whatnot. any insight into that would be welcome, too.
    Last edited by kel; 12-30-2016 at 01:48 AM.

  21. #741
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    @kel , thanks for reaching out. everyone is different and I am not a doctor, but I will share what I can. Your dX of Bipolar II with Hypomania seems correct to me. In Bipolar II, the afflicted person experiences hypomania instead of full-blown mania. Hypomania is a mild form of mania marked by elation or increased goal-oriented activity, hyperactivity. These hypomanic states are pretty rare, maybe once or twice a year, but hypomania alternates with states of extreme depression.

    So, to answer your question, yes, what you are experiencing appears to be textbook Bipolar II disorder. Whether it makes for a functional adulthood isn't relevant to the question. That's not to say it isn't valid, it's just a different type of query. My personal opinion regarding one's ability to function in these states it too colored by my personal Bipolar I experiences.

    I'm currently taking 200mg Lamotrigine/day, 40mg Duloxetine/day, 1-2mgs Lorazepam/day. Lamotrigine is an anticonvulsant used for seizure control and is very common in Bipolar treatment. Duloxetine is a SNRI (Seratonin-Norepinephrine Reuptake Inhibitor) used to treat Depression. Lorazepam is a benzodiazepine that aids in calming panic attacks, anxiety, and helps sleep.

    I am sorry, I know nothing about quietiapine.

  22. #742
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    Does high functioning autism count? I know it's kind of a meme and people are usually not believed when they say they have it, but I am actually diagnosed and have it on paper, so I guess I have that.

    Not sure if that belongs here, so feel free to skip this, I have a lot of questions upon where I am upon the autistic spectrum, I am diagnosed with asperger's syndrome.

    It has affected me ever since the beginning of life and still is and always will. There was no tipping point, teacher in high school just noticed my behaviour and means of expressing myself strange. And then I went to psychologist and got officially diagnosed. I could have gotten this diagnosis long time ago and it would have saved me a lot of issues, because I was wrongly diagnosed as a kid, they thought I had a mild form of mental retardation. Which hurt me in the long run in school.

    There was a sense of relief, over the course of entirety of my life I thought I was a dumbass for not understanding certain social rules. The habbits I've made for myself, overall, I always found that taking care of my emotions is very difficult, seemingly more than for other people, I noticed that this seems to be a common train amongs autistic people, it seems like autism affects and has far more symptoms than wikipedia could ever tell you, it affects stuff like sensetivity, the way you hear things, apparently people without autism can focus on one sound, yet I hear absolutely everything, if there is a guy talking to me I can hear the other fifty guys in the other room, the floor the guy is stepping on while he's talking to me, apparently other people don't have this, I dunno.

    Nevertheless, I am scared shitless, since having autism causes me to have much smaller self-awareness in terms what could be conidered cringe worthy, I am always scared that I am making a fool out of myself and will end up in the next glorious cringe compilation or something like that, I was a very cringy kid and a teen. Just looking back to see how I was acting and the voice I said is making me ashamed. I didn't know any better, yet, sometimes I get this feeling when I just look a week back to what I did or said.


    I am also close to getting a diagnosis to some kind of depression, I am not gonna say I have it, I don't have on a paper, anywhere, so I don't want to pretend like I have it, I went to my psychologist, but for some reason, she can't diagnose me and is sending me to another one who can diagnose me, yet the way she speaks, she seems to believe that I have it as well, and well, I felt like shit ever since my youth. But again, the problem may be elsewhere. I personally would be happy to get it offically diagnosed, even though I seem to fill-into every single symptom there is for a diagnosed depression.

    As for tipping point, my energy, happiness and overall satisfaction of life has steadilly declined over years, I now don't enjoy much of things and the stuff I used to enjoy I get sick of that I just want to scream. My life isn't bad, I have many great things here and gained more over years, I won't lie and say that every moment of days is absolutely terrible hell, most of the time depresion doesn't feel sad, it's a feeling of looking at the world of glass where you become so disconnected from the world it does not feel real, any of it.

    You start caring less and may even actually think it isn't real, then, finally, you hit the point where that other voice gets into you, the dread sets in and tells you how worthless you are, how hollow your existence is and entire world at large, it tells you how fake every one's love towards you is, how fake just joy is.

    Of course, these are all lies. But you believe them, you even tell yourself in that state that it's fake, it doesn't matter, the feeling of these thoughts feels real, super real, it doesn't matter even if deep inside you know they're lies, your brain somehow believes them anyway. You start feeling bad for having these thoughts, you are questioning yourself if there is something wrong with you, you start questioning if you ARE ill..or if you are just making shit up to make excuses for being either lazy or a failure.

    Then, you start losing yourself, you forget your past yorself, you forget if you ever were happy at all, attempts at discrabing your personality falls apart and you start feeling like an empty walking body without anything in it, without any impact upon anything. Give it hours, days or weeks or longer and that feeling will calm itself, it is always there, but not as strong, but sometimes, it can be intense as this.

    I feel bad for writting about "depression" when I am not even fully diagnosed. These are just things I've been genuinelly experiencing, I don't feel good about writting about it, I don't even know why I am, it feels good, I guess, but it feels also wrong, I feel scared as if people are going to judge me or just tell me that I am lying to myself, so I just don't tell any one and keep this all for myself and try to pretend to be happy and positive as much as I can, both to cheer up people around me and myself. This is getting harder and harder though, it used to work but now I can barely keep that together anymore.

    Naturally, I also have cases of self-harming, I thought this shit was behind me but I self-harmed by hitting myself in the head when I had a panic attack because I was being insulted and yelled at through text from a person who means everything to me, let's see, I scratched my body, hitted myself and was making a suicide plan.

    I do suicide plans almost all the time, I have day dreams of me killing myself and feeling relief all the time, there is this feeling of intense frustrations, anger, sadness, I can't never get it out, I punch table, stuff around me, but nope, it stays there until it leaves without any satisfaction of relief.


    I just need the diagnosis, yes/no, doesn't matter, I want answers, so I can fix myself and be better, for people I love, there are people who depend on me in ways, I can't let them down. If I know it's depression, I will feel that small sense of relief once I was diagnosed with autism, that kind of "aha, that's it". That will help me at least a little bit and then I can get started from there on a journey to somehow deal with this and calm this and live normally.


    So yeah, I'm fucked up, I guess, I will either remove this in few hours, or try to pretend I didn't write this and share this.
    Last edited by HWB; 02-11-2017 at 05:29 PM.

  23. #743
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    Quote Originally Posted by HWB View Post
    I will either remove this in few hours, or try to pretend I didn't write this and share this.
    In that case, I won't quote the full post. I think the only way anybody here will judge you is positively, for being open and honest about yourself and your struggles. You're not alone.

    The mere fact that you can articulate how you feel AND that you're seeing someone to talk about is great. There are many people who know these feelings as well, but who try to hide them and keep them a secret and it only makes things worse in the long run.

    I'm not a psychologist, I've never taken a single course in psychology or behavioral studies, but I've got my own mental health issues and I know that things can feel like they're snowballing. Keep taking the positive steps you're already taking. If that includes sharing here, by all means, share as little or as much as you're comfortable with. You said you have a lot of questions. Worst case, there's probably someone here who's felt the same and can at least respond to those questions with what they've learned and experienced themselves.

  24. #744
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    Quote Originally Posted by theimage13 View Post
    In that case, I won't quote the full post. I think the only way anybody here will judge you is positively, for being open and honest about yourself and your struggles. You're not alone.

    The mere fact that you can articulate how you feel AND that you're seeing someone to talk about is great. There are many people who know these feelings as well, but who try to hide them and keep them a secret and it only makes things worse in the long run.

    I'm not a psychologist, I've never taken a single course in psychology or behavioral studies, but I've got my own mental health issues and I know that things can feel like they're snowballing. Keep taking the positive steps you're already taking. If that includes sharing here, by all means, share as little or as much as you're comfortable with. You said you have a lot of questions. Worst case, there's probably someone here who's felt the same and can at least respond to those questions with what they've learned and experienced themselves.
    Thank you very much, I don't think I will remove this, I think I will keep it here, one of the biggest reasons why I am so scared to share this stuff since I am afraid the person who means so much to me will find this stuff, I don't know why, but if they were ever to see this other part of me, I don't know what I'd do, it scares me. They're very depressed themselves and have some really awful moods that I can't get them out of, the best I can do is to remain positive for their well being.

    But I don't think they will step their food in here...

    ....I listened to so much Nine Inch Nails they told me they are disgusted in the band, so! I guess this place is safe, lol.

  25. #745
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    @HWB , you don't have to be officially "diagnosed" to know how you feel; nobody is a better judge of how you feel than you. An expert can confirm it, but that's mostly for treatment options. But you know that what you feel isn't "good," and it's bothering you, and you are taking the steps to do something about it. It will take effort, but you're on the right track.

    Your partner and you should discuss this, though? I don't think you should be afraid of talking with your partner. You can help each other, maybe, yes? If your partner's "really awful moods" are negatively impacting you, that's not good, either. You know what I mean?
    Last edited by allegro; 02-12-2017 at 10:40 AM.

  26. #746
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    @allegro I would not say they badly affect me, they affect me the way you should be affected when some one close to you is depressed or in general is going through troubles, you feel very scared for their own good and do your best to understand and put as much time as possible to get them through. It isn't a pretty feeling, but love in my eyes is being together, both in happy times and also in the dark times. So I don't think this is a problem, I would like to really thank you for taking that into consideration though.

    My partner is depressed, as I am and they're an amazing person, I have discussed it with them multiple times, we always try to make each other feel better, I don't always say how I'm feeling, especially when I see them in an amazing mood, I want to join their mood, if possible and distract myself from what I am currently feeling.

    Thank you all for support that has been given to me, it means a lot to me. I intend to move forward and see what other things could possibly help me, I do have a tiny bit of an idea how I'd like my future to be, the one I guess I'd be happy in, I don't have much of motivation or energy to reach it right now, I want to get properly motivateda nd push on. I am considering taking a look into anti-depressants, that is if I will have them recommended by professionals.

    I have been in general slowly opening up, something that was always very trouble-some for me. I think I might be getting somewhere, at the same time I feel like I should have done this sooner, I started doing osomething only when the problem became so bad it became both very noticable and undeniable, but I guess that is normal when it comes to things like this
    Last edited by HWB; 02-11-2017 at 07:56 PM.

  27. #747
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    @HWB the journey to finding a stable place may seem a long one. but the fact that you've actively sought help, is one hell of a huge step, and that you are aware of your feelings etc, and also now feeling able to express these too is probably an even bigger step!

    i too agree too that you should stay quiet about it, it's nothing to feel ashamed about or worried about, and in the long run, you may find that being open about it helps you more.

    one thing i always suggest to people is educate your self on your illness, it can help so much!

    as i think i've said before in this thread. i waited a long time before i could admit openly, that i've had issues since childhood.

    i have Borderline Personality Disorder, which affects me in quite a few ways quite like Asperger's.
    but i know very little about.




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  28. #748
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    Quote Originally Posted by theimage13 View Post
    in that case, i won't quote the full post. I think the only way anybody here will judge you is positively, for being open and honest about yourself and your struggles. You're not alone.

    The mere fact that you can articulate how you feel and that you're seeing someone to talk about is great. There are many people who know these feelings as well, but who try to hide them and keep them a secret and it only makes things worse in the long run.

    I'm not a psychologist, i've never taken a single course in psychology or behavioral studies, but i've got my own mental health issues and i know that things can feel like they're snowballing. Keep taking the positive steps you're already taking. If that includes sharing here, by all means, share as little or as much as you're comfortable with. You said you have a lot of questions. Worst case, there's probably someone here who's felt the same and can at least respond to those questions with what they've learned and experienced themselves.
    this. !

  29. #749
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    I usually am pretty quiet on this matter as it embarrasses and infuriates me but how do you deal with an immediate family member who has paranoid schizophrenia? I can no longer take it or deal with it anymore. I am at wit's end dealing with this bullshit. I have tried to give as much patience and time as I can with trying to cope, deal with and encourage it (within reason) to pacify it. I can no longer deal with it and it has made the relationship deteriorate steadily for the probably the last 10 years at this point. Is there anyway to truly deal with this with civility? I don't know anymore.

  30. #750
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    Let me first start off by saying I'm loving life right now, I'm living my dream job, have a girlfriend who really loves me and I her, my family is in good health, and I'm taking my medication for my depression and ADD with no changes in medication, however, at night time I think to myself how happy I am, and what dreams I want to accomplish, yet I always end up thinking: "But I'm probably going to kill myself." I have no clue why,.. I don't like it.

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