The Mental Health thread - depression, bipolar, ADHD, you name it

[Sarah K]

Got officially diagnosed today. It's pretty much what I thought, which in many ways is good. Next week, I'll start the process of treating these things.

!

Happy for you!

[kel]

without combing through the bulk of this thread, can i ask if any members are taking seroquel (quietapine - or something close - is generic)?

i was diagnosed four years ago and have been on it with moderate success (haven't needed benzos for a long time). i wanted something supplemental, just feeling like i've plateaued. my doctor threw on zoloft (because it's cheap), but it brought all that debilitating anxiety back in full force. i immediately stopped taking it (i should've known -- zoloft didn't work when i was 16, it's not gonna work at 33), but i have yet to tell my doctor.

anyway, if anyone here is also taking seroquel and has tried add-ons, please let me know what's worked or hasn't worked.

thanks in advance

[Charmingly Miserable]

Well, today put me back a month ago. Feeling completely worthless, hopeless, helpless and utterly miserable. Life blows.

[Sarah K]

Well, today put me back a month ago. Feeling completely worthless, hopeless, helpless and utterly miserable. Life blows.

I felt like that yesterday and this morning. This afternoon was a bit better. I think because tonight is the only night this week that I don't have plans, so I looked forward to BEING LAZY this evening. Even though all of the activities that I have planned are things that I enjoy, I find that I also need some downtime to look forward to... This Sunday, I fully intend on staying in my pajamas all day!

These last couple of days have been pretty weird emotionally for me. But I think/hope that it is just situations that have happened. I don't feel like I'm sinking back into full blown depression, anyway.

I have a friend in LA who is in crisis mode, and I feel fucking helpless trying to assist from across the country. It's taking a toll.

[Leviathant]

I'm talking a stranger through a schizophrenic break (or whatever the proper term is) through email in my spare time: "I have literally no one in my life."

[elevenism]

I'm talking a stranger through a schizophrenic break (or whatever the proper term is) through email in my spare time: "I have literally no one in my life."

i think it's so fucking awesome what we can do for strangers on the internet, or near strangers like friends from ets.

A girl i didn't know talked to me on facebook for hours a day for MONTHS and literally saved my life when my ex wound up with my best friend who subsequently overdosed on smack and died.

I really don't think i'd be here if it wasn't for that woman. She remembered me from high school but i didn't remember her.

[elevenism]

without combing through the bulk of this thread, can i ask if any members are taking seroquel (quietapine - or something close - is generic)?

i was diagnosed four years ago and have been on it with moderate success (haven't needed benzos for a long time). i wanted something supplemental, just feeling like i've plateaued. my doctor threw on zoloft (because it's cheap), but it brought all that debilitating anxiety back in full force. i immediately stopped taking it (i should've known -- zoloft didn't work when i was 16, it's not gonna work at 33), but i have yet to tell my doctor.

anyway, if anyone here is also taking seroquel and has tried add-ons, please let me know what's worked or hasn't worked.

thanks in advance

i take it...actually i don't take it like i'm supposed to because it kinda zombifies me.
maybe if i took it long enough, i wouldn't need benzos either.

pm me if you wanna talk more about it...or we can talk here. i'm in a hurry right now.

sorry for double post.

i go see my new psychiatrist on monday...what is the hot new antidepressant?

[kel]

so here's the thing (and it's scattered and random and heavy and weird) ...

when i was in high school, in kimberly, idaho, in the late 90's, there was a guy in my graduating class (who i grew up with), popular from day one, from a comfortable two-parent household, plenty of money ...

who hated me and made my four years in high school absolute hell. the night we all went out for dinner for sadie hawkins, he refused to eat with me being there, so my "friends" made me wait outside after i'd finished, because he refused to eat with a gay guy.

that's just the tip of it, and it got much, much worse.

anyway, he killed himself on sunday in mount vernon, new york.

i don't know how to feel, really, but i'm feeling a lot of something ... like we clearly had more in common than he thought in terms of mental sickness ... and i'm spending way more time than i want to wondering why ...

btw, @elevenism , thank you.

[Digital Twilight]

We always have more in common than we think. Our problem is we are taught to be afraid of difference and to conform to what we think we are supposed to be. Our differences should be celebrated and explored instead of shunned and ridiculed. It's one of mankind's greatest sins.

[ophelia_]

Blurgh. I have been so depressed the past few days and I don't even know why. My anxiety is going overboard and I don't feel like I can even do normal day to day things... Like the thought of having a shower makes me want to cry. I had to drag myself out of bed yesterday and into the bathroom and I just sat under the shower for about half an hour sobbing.

My anxiety is usually pretty bad but it has been so much worse in the past few days due to this depressed slump I am experiencing. It's affecting all the different facets of my life, which normally I am pretty good at hiding away and keeping to myself... I am SO paranoid about this new relationship due to being cheated on so much in the past. I can't stop thinking that he is fucking someone else, and he has given me no reason to think that - it's just my brain telling me that I'm not good enough and that he doesn't want me.

I don't know if it's the depression and anxiety, but I'm having so many second thoughts about even being in a relationship... Maybe it's just cause I haven't seen him for a few days. (we both went away on the weekend to different things/have been busy with life stuff).

I hate everything right now. Sigh. At work and I just want to curl up under my desk and pretend life doesn't exist for a bit.

[Charmingly Miserable]

Blurgh. I have been so depressed the past few days and I don't even know why. My anxiety is going overboard and I don't feel like I can even do normal day to day things... Like the thought of having a shower makes me want to cry. I had to drag myself out of bed yesterday and into the bathroom and I just sat under the shower for about half an hour sobbing.

My anxiety is usually pretty bad but it has been so much worse in the past few days due to this depressed slump I am experiencing. It's affecting all the different facets of my life, which normally I am pretty good at hiding away and keeping to myself... I am SO paranoid about this new relationship due to being cheated on so much in the past. I can't stop thinking that he is fucking someone else, and he has given me no reason to think that - it's just my brain telling me that I'm not good enough and that he doesn't want me.

I don't know if it's the depression and anxiety, but I'm having so many second thoughts about even being in a relationship... Maybe it's just cause I haven't seen him for a few days. (we both went away on the weekend to different things/have been busy with life stuff).

I hate everything right now. Sigh. At work and I just want to curl up under my desk and pretend life doesn't exist for a bit.

Sorry to hear that. Would it make you feel better if you talked to your boyfriend about your anxieties? A good boyfriend will not only listen, but he will be supportive too. (And I'm talking to you like I have a boyfriend and know everything to know about relationships.... lol)

I see my therapist and my psych tomorrow. I'm gonna ask for more time off from work. Just the thought about returning back to work puts me in a panic attack.

[Sarah K]

I'm giving up on my therapist. She's fucking stupid. Plus, it takes me about an hour and fifteen minutes to get there from work. Then about an hour and a half to get home. It's just annoying. Then I have the pleasure of shelling out the $1,000 each month for her + the psychiatrist. No, thanks. I have paper prescriptions for about the next month and a half. That will give me time to find someone closer.

[ophelia_]

He's shit at communicating at the best of times, and I feel like even though he would listen if I were to spill this all out on him, it would just make me feel worse... I think this is just something I need to have a cry to my best friend about, and try and sort my shit out and it will get better.

Hopefully I'll see him tomorrow or thursday, so some of the anxiety about him cheating on me will fuck off. Trying to be positive is so hard sometimes. Wah.

Hope you feel better tomorrow after seeing your therapist & psych. When are you due back at work?

[aggroculture]

ophelia: do something for yourself that feels good for you! Try not to define yourself exclusively by your relationship anxieties; you can't be happy or relaxed in the relationship if you are not happy or relaxed independently of it.
(I need to follow this advice too...)

[Sarah K]

http://www.thedailybeast.com/article...but-eight.html

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/n...enia/15535557/

This is potentially a HUGE, and extremely exciting breakthrough. People diagnosed with schizophrenia were generally BY FAR the hardest people to work with when I had that job. If this research holds, it basically confirms that we've been approaching treatment horribly wrong since forever.

This is fascinating to me.

[Swykk]

Annoyed and sad today. Some things just don't add up. I'm constantly told how my outlook is supposedly so bad but then it's those same people who constantly reaffirm it for me.

[Sarah K]

http://thoughtcatalog.com/holly-ever...ve-depression/

Awwwww. This made me tear up a little.

[Swykk]

Wouldn't that be nice (the article)?

[Digital Twilight]

I've had a terrible two weeks, struggled to do anything productive but I managed to cook in past two days so that's something. It's been a couple of months since I last did that. The doc increased my meds today and I have my phone interview for councelling tomorrow. It's weird facing myself and life as an illness.

I just started reading Ruby Wax's book Sane New World about depression and mindfulness. A good laugh so far and quite interesting.

[Halo Infinity]

While getting comfortable in my own skin is going to take a lot longer than I thought, it definitely helped to remind myself that I don't always have to fight back, fix things, or please others. It's amazing as to how something simple can be so overlooked, considering how blinding, contradicting, complex and misleading emotions can be. I've always been aware that it's also a form of letting go, which is a struggle I've also brought up/ran into at several other parts of ETS.

For the most part, it has mostly left me running and hiding, even though that doesn't always solve everything/anything, nor is it always the right thing to do. Anyway, I still thank anybody that was kind enough to hear me out and give me supportive advice. It was always appreciated, and thank you for your understanding. In spite of my roller coaster emotions and roller coaster moments on ETS, it's what made my 3 years (At least by December 1, 2014 that is.) here a lot better than ever before.

[elevenism]

So i finally went to my new psych dr yesterday and got two new, new meds...Brintellix and Latuda (i think that's how they are spelled.)

I'm excited because i've tried damn near all the old meds with VERY limited success. These meds work differently.

Also, i've only had two doses of the meds but i haven't needed my xanax yet.

I am VERY optimistic that these meds will work.

[Sarah K]

The Wellbutrin makes me wired(although not as much as when I first started it), so I got a prescription for a Trazodone, which doesn't make me sleep, either. Haha. It for sure relaxes me a bit. I'm almost ALWAYS moving around my feet, legs, or hands. I notice that I stop that a while after taking the Trazodone. But I don't really feel sleepy at all on it. I'm averaging 3 - 4 hours of sleep for the last couple of weeks. I HATE taking Ambien, because I always feel like shit the next day. I dunno what else to try.

[Charmingly Miserable]

Hope you feel better tomorrow after seeing your therapist & psych. When are you due back at work?

Saw my psych and therapist yesterday. My psych gave me another month of work, to my relief. I go see a reiki healer tomorrow. I'm super excited about that and hope that he will give me some kind of direction in my life.

[playwithfire]

My depression (mild most of the time)/the usual daily coping with my OCD/being too busy and tired whenever I'm home/too much stuff happening this weekend when I need downtime/my boyfriend having his own problems and not being able to cope well with mine =

[Charmingly Miserable]

So, I went to the Integratron all by myself today and had a vision of inner peace. I needed this to get myself in the right direction.

[elevenism]

So when it was all said and done I lost two very close, dear friends with whom I've been down for like 18 years in five weeks. Both to suicide. And I just know that my best friend, suicide friend number one's husband, is gonna kill himself too. This HURTS

[Aywok]

My experience with Doxepin thus far has been rather horrible. My doctor has convinced me that I need to be on a tricyclic, but the Doxepin has been bad news. I cannot stand the "drugged" feeling associated with it, and I've had plenty of "experiences" in my (former) life with downers. After 3 days or so, I develop hand tremors that last literally the entire time I'm conscious. The "best" solution my doctor can think of at the moment is putting me on Gabapentin in addition to the Doxepin.

It's been commonplace for a while, but why do we as a society feel the need to treat-side effects from drugs with additional drugs? I'm far from trusting most internet sources, but I am unable to find one article/blog/freaking Facebook post that says taking both of those medications together is a good idea, especially with no history of seizures.

[somethingelse]

^ that sucks

My Seroquel prescription has been discontinued, as the side effects of talking in my sleep (angrily) is too extreme. I didn't ask about a suitable replacement as I thought that would have been a given. Plus my need to end interactions as 'frictionless as possible' interfered. Sigh.

[Digital Twilight]

I had my first session of CBT yesterday and I'm quite optimistic about it. The counsellor seems nice and keen to have the course tailored to my needs and what works/doesn't work for me personally.

I've also stopped taking my meds as I think it was the cause of me not getting any sleep and I think maybe my mind is a little sharper because of it. Only been a few days though so I'll continue to monitor it.

[Joy Prevention Hotline]

It's been commonplace for a while, but why do we as a society feel the need to treat-side effects from drugs with additional drugs?

After nine years of trying to find one drug that does what I need and no more, I've resigned myself to taking three drugs so I can function properly. Individually they all have serious problems — Prozac and Strattera cause my internal clock to malfunction, and Nortriptyline makes me anxious and agitated — but in combination those effects cancel out. (Still needs some tweaking though.)

Nortriptyline has a bunch of other side effects that are damned annoying (sigh), but they don't disrupt my life — and I've spent a lot of time looking for an alternative to tricyclics.