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Thread: The little things that piss you off

  1. #6691
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    Quote Originally Posted by katara View Post
    Acceptance, patience, and most importantly, the benefit of the doubt are aspects that are best exercised on both sides in these circumstances.
    i agree completely. the problem is often that those who misgender folks (unintentionally) tend to re-focus the situation on themselves, i.e. "i'm trying! don't get mad at me!" instead of the more sympathetic "sorry that i made you uncomfortable."

  2. #6692
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    I’d have gladly lived my entire working life disguised as a male if at all possible to avoid the job and wage discrimination (and sexual harassment).

    Hi. I know this is entirely a hypothetical for you, but I have actually lived that. I lived the first 34 years of my life pretending to be a male. It almost killed me. Please take many fucking seats before you speak on lived experiences you have never had.

    In erasing the word “female” from products, we are gradually erasing female identity.
    No, we're not. Being more inclusive is not erasing you. Trans men and non-binary people need menstrual products, too. You can take this TERF talking point and shove it.

    I know most of ETS won't get this. And I don't mean that as a knock on you all. But there are dog whistles in here. Big ones. Big, bigoted dog whistles. As a trans woman who has spent years and years dealing with bigots, I can tell you, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Cat Mom is one. You're a TERF. Flat out. Fuck you and your bigotry.

    And if anyone wonders why I am being so hostile toward someone who "just has a differing opinion" or thinks that she is making a civil argument while I am going off the rails, then all I can ask you to do is trust me when I say I've seen this before. A lot. I have no patience for bigotry. I have no patience for hashing it out. I've seen this over and over and over again. I know all the dog whistles. I'm not doing this. I'm not debating my existence with anyone.

    Last edited by theruiner; 12-14-2019 at 04:28 AM.

  3. #6693
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    Boy, terfs sure are fuckin trash

  4. #6694
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    Quote Originally Posted by theruiner View Post
    I know most of ETS won't get this. And I don't mean that as a knock on you all. But there are dog whistles in here. Big ones. Big, bigoted dog whistles. As a trans woman who has spent years and years dealing with bigots, I can tell you, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Cat Mom is one. You're a TERF. Flat out. Fuck you and your bigotry.

    And if anyone wonders why I am being so hostile toward someone who "just has a differing opinion" or thinks that she is making a civil argument while I am going off the rails, then all I can ask you to do is trust me when I say I've seen this before. A lot. I have no patience for bigotry. I have no patience for hashing it out. I've seen this over and over and over again. I know all the dog whistles. I'm not doing this. I'm not debating my existence with anyone.
    Sorry.

    I’m not good at trying to expressing General stuff, from an academic standpoint.

    I wasn’t stating personal feelings of “TERF” or whatever (I had to Google it). I’m not a radical anything. I was simply speaking from an academic and (later) from a heart-felt personal standpoint, from my personal belief that (as Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said) kindness and understanding toward each other has often been a good way for world progress, vs. the opposite. You’re projecting stuff onto me, but you weren’t in the original discussion. I was viewing through the lens of both posters above my original comment (neither were you). Empathy and compassion toward anyone’s true suffering, not comparison.
    Last edited by Cat Mom; 01-07-2020 at 05:06 PM.

  5. #6695
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    As another person who has lived way too much of their life in both worlds, keep your "if only I could just pretend to be a man" bullshit to yourself. And really, the misogyny and bigotry you face as a woman in this world vs a trans person, it's not even comparable.

    The little thing that pisses me off today: when people say this kind of shit about trans and NB folk.

  6. #6696
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    It always slightly pisses me off whenever a movie which wins a lot of rewards and is being hyped as if it is of such extreme quality turns out to feel really bland and ugly to me.

  7. #6697
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    So, I am not living alone anymore! I have a little thing here... a marten. ;-) It is somewhere in the roof and sometimes it even forces me to rather go sleep downstairs - in my own house (bar the mortage) that is. Can't figure out how it gets there (where??) or how to get rid of it, ultrasonic device nothing, leaving loud angry dogs barking sounds loop and go away for a week nothing, gonna try some smelly spray and then I don't know. Then there are traps but from what I've seen these little creatures are smart as hell, and poisoning is not an option, I don't want to do it, it's illegal, and also what if it died somewhere in the roof, no. Hey, marten! Fuck you! ;-)


  8. #6698
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    @Substance242 i just looked up what a marten is and oh my god it is so cute. it might be super cold...maybe put out a blanket for it that you don't care about with a little food and it will stop trying to enter your attic? idunno.

  9. #6699
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    YouTube videos with text-to-speech and the speech part is firmly rooted in the 1980s...

    ...along with narrators that read text in other videos but then they miss sentences, or change words...
    Last edited by MrLobster; 12-31-2019 at 05:29 PM.

  10. #6700
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    Found out that this music app I use on IOS received a "pro" version about a year ago and as far as I can tell it fixes everything that was wrong with the "+" version that I paid for but this is another $4.99. So I have to either keep using the version that was phased out and is broken or I can just pay the $5. I know it's only $5 but it's also the general idea that I paid for this and just because he wants to make money and add "pro" to the name he can charge for it all over again. On top of that the app includes "tips" you can pay randomly because hey maybe you were thinking 'sure I'll give him a dollar today."

    I fully acknowledge that I'm in a bad mood right now and cantankerous to boot so I'm not looking at it the right way. I blame Kickstarter.

  11. #6701
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    today is my birthday and two of my best friends didn't even text me to say "happy birthday"
    like...i don't need a gift, i don't need you to make a big deal. but is it that hard to send a fucking text? especially since i was talking to one of them and mentioned that i was doing birthday stuff. i don't get it

  12. #6702
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    Quote Originally Posted by eversonpoe View Post
    today is my birthday and two of my best friends didn't even text me to say "happy birthday"
    like...i don't need a gift, i don't need you to make a big deal. but is it that hard to send a fucking text? especially since i was talking to one of them and mentioned that i was doing birthday stuff. i don't get it
    the same thing happened to me in november. two weeks later she invited me out to celebrate a mutual acquaintance's (at best) birthday. i thanked her, but politely declined. fuck you.

    i'm sorry that really sucks.

    happy birthday, max! <3

  13. #6703
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    Quote Originally Posted by eversonpoe View Post
    today is my birthday and two of my best friends didn't even text me to say "happy birthday"
    like...i don't need a gift, i don't need you to make a big deal. but is it that hard to send a fucking text? especially since i was talking to one of them and mentioned that i was doing birthday stuff. i don't get it
    well, to quote twitter, happy fucking birthday.

  14. #6704
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    Quote Originally Posted by eversonpoe View Post
    today is my birthday and two of my best friends didn't even text me to say "happy birthday"
    like...i don't need a gift, i don't need you to make a big deal. but is it that hard to send a fucking text? especially since i was talking to one of them and mentioned that i was doing birthday stuff. i don't get it
    That sucks, I'm sorry. I know what that feels like, because my birthday is a handful of days before xmas, and none of my 'close' friends texted me on the day. Some sort of acknowledgement goes a long way. FWIW, congrats on another completed orbit around the sun.

  15. #6705
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    A student I've worked with closely recently died, and I'm nearly certain that she killed herself after getting dismissed from her program.

    She wasn't even 40 yet, but was going blind and there was a lot of denial around that. She had always been a nurse, so the new disability necessitated a career change. She was having a very hard time adjusting to her new reality but it seemed to be going better lately. My coworker who has been blind his whole life told her a while back more or less... "Look, you don't have to like it, but this is your life now, and you have to adjust." after we were met with resistance on various interventions and supports.

    It's come to light that she had nearly $150k in student loans, and a few people in my office are trying to see what we need to do in order to get them written off. But this involves obtaining a death certificate, and the only point of contact we really have for her is her daughter who is still in high school.

    While all of this fucking sucks, the thing that's really getting to me is that I handle our emergency laptop loan program, and even though they are supposed to be short loans, I've always given her one for the whole semester for accessibility and software reasons. I let the Dean over tech stuff know that she had one checked out so they could write it off. But no. His response was to tell me to find out who her emergency contact was, and he would go meet them to pick it up. A low end laptop that's probably close to 5 years old, so it's worth nothing. So fucking unnecessary. This is a man who is usually pretty reasonable and student-centered, so I'm really hoping that I just caught him off-guard and his brain wasn't processing fast enough or something. Because man, what a shitty response.

    My coworker went to her funeral, and instead of using it as an opportunity to celebrate her life, they took turns speaking where the main focus was to tell the teenage daughter that this was a sign that she needed to find jesus and all types of dumb religious shit.

  16. #6706
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    That is horrible. In every way.

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