Fuck me. (No, seriously.)

[miss k bee]

Year and a half now, soon will forget how to do it!

Damn it need a man soon!

[Sallos]

How can a thread named Fuck me be this depressing?

[halloween]

Because being fuckless is always depressing. I'm having too many dreams about my first boyfriend, some of them sexy dreams. I'm not grateful for it, it's just bugging me because I'd rather be having sexy dreams with my current love interest...

[the duder]

Totally wishing my lady friend didn't live in Florida...I could really, really go for a good, top to bottom, foreplay-heavy, multi-position, hour(s) long sex session. This summer spoiled me with the incredible coitus we had.

[botley]

I'm glad to be back in the city. Regular fucks foreseeable!

[Fixer808]

This dry spell is getting intolerable, and I don't forsee it ending any time soon. Working nights really hamstrings my social life...

[Pillfred]

Could have scored the other night but when we got back to her place i saw a condom wrapper on the ground combined with the scent of coitus in the air kind of turned me off, then there was the crazy talk... I don't mean to overtly judge here but to say it tipped off some flags. And if were to be completely honest had i had a condom i most likely would have done it. In any event i left the next morning with the first case of true blue balls i have had in some time.

[Frozen Beach]

I spent my night at a bar with my sister while smoking cigarettes and lusting after her friend, who is absolutely gorgeous and teases me all the time. I've been told she's a lesbian though, which makes me wish I were a Woman right now...

[R-Dot-Yung]

Considering fucking is really all we're supposed to do here on earth besides survive, you'd think we'd all be fucking all day until the there was no more sandwiches.

[poinoup]

It's been about eighteen months in poinoup-land. Go me...

But it's still not as bad as my drought in early 2005 to late 2007.

[Big Fat Matt]

day 666:

the friendzone remains a barren wasteland. no nourishment, and only the occasional drizzle to keep me alive. strewn around me i see skeletons of men who have been subjected and succumbed to this torture. i must remain strong.

- M


kinda makes me yearn for the days when i was a womanizing pillhead and i could pull pussy like it was nobodies business.

[Frozen Beach]

I'm pretty sure the only way to get out of the friendzone is to make that friend jealous, or at least become more close to who you want to be, not who you have settled to be.

[Big Fat Matt]

I'm pretty sure the only way to get out of the friendzone is to make that friend jealous, or at least become more close to who you want to be, not who you have settled to be.

i was typing a response to this and it was about 2 paragraphs long, so i summed it up for you.

"YOU CANT TELL ME WHAT TO DO YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD."

she is in every respect, physically, emotionally, intellectually, etc my IDEAL woman. she will be mine one day. (jesus fuck i sound like a creep)

-edit- this issue probably belongs in the relationship thread

[Frozen Beach]

i was typing a response to this and it was about 2 paragraphs long, so i summed it up for you.

"YOU CANT TELL ME WHAT TO DO YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD."

she is in every respect, physically, emotionally, intellectually, etc my IDEAL woman. she will be mine one day. (jesus fuck i sound like a creep)

-edit- this issue probably belongs in the relationship thread

To be honest, I think it's more creepy not to think that way. I think thinking otherwise means that you actually weren't that serious to begin. I think people forget that people change over time after they get experience from life. The only thing I think stops people from being with the one they want is marriage, but we all know how inconsistent marriage is(not to say that anyone's marriage here is going to downfall). Keep your hopes down, but store it in your emotional freezer for the time being.

Also, nice guys might finish last, but in the end, I think they're the only people who truly finish.

[lady weetly]

I haven't had any in a year and a few weeks. Last time was with my ex, who was my first, and I just haven't since then. The only person I've been really attracted to is one of my friends and we've been heading in that direction slowly for months now. I can not explain how horny I have been. Fuuuuck.

[Fixer808]

My quest now is for pussy. I hope to find it at Galaxion on the 6th.

[pigpen]

So close, yet so far... Ugh.

[miss k bee]

Dry spell might be ending soon!!! **hopes and prays**

[playwithfire]

wrong thread!

[REPLICA]

So even though I've never felt the need to have a one night stand, tonight seemed like the night for me to have such. Unfortunately, that would not fare with me tonight. The cutest girls at the bar left before 10pm and I ended up staying there until 11:50pm - naturally the bar was just full of basketball and football (euro) fans - which I have no beef with, I enjoy Euro football (soccer).

Anyway, I haven't had sex since my ex girlfriend left for Sweden nearly 6 months ago… So… I'm really antsy right now to have someone to hold for the night. It's pretty bad, I have gotten to the point to start up an online account at Datemyschool and Match to see if I can get anyone local but they all say they want a man to be there for them and their children. SO YEAH. The one girl I know well here at UNCG is not interested at all in me and her friends are all engaged.

I have asked out three different girls (the Australian, a runner girl and the lady friend I know) and each has said no. So, I'm back to square one… I hate not having anyone to be with. I am hoping that I get to find a summer fling or something… I don't like going a year or two without sex, it makes me really mean/frustrated.

TL;DR - I wish I had a girl to sleep with tonight! I hope I find a summer fling! I NEED SEX NOW!

[botley]

Pay a prostitute. Srsly.

[vpintz]

Need. Sex. Nao.

(inb4 sheepdean says "yes pls")

[alg]

3 years without sex but I'm ok because current bf is far away but knows how to keep me satisfied (I love Skype lol)

[miss k bee]

Well that's my sex life dead for another two years!

[Krazy]

Goal for the night: masterbate and "finish the job" before falling asleep.

FML. :/

[frankie teardrop]

try taking some benadryl for extra challenge! or sit on and then use your left hand.

[playwithfire]

try taking some benadryl for extra challenge! or sit on and then use your left hand.

Or wear a latex glove.

[playwithfire]

Annnd horny.

[Digital Twilight]

Ugh! Its been about 18 months for me, although a hot steamy sex romp would be delightful I think I miss the intimacy more right now. Waking up in the arms of a good woman is the greatest feeling and I could use a bit of female encouragement during this awful period job hunting i'm going through at the minute.

Here's hoping you're all having better luck than me right now

[slave2thewage]

I need a big injection of Vitamin D.

IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.