Note To Self: If I knew back then, what I know right now.

[Halo Infinity]

This is an idea that I actually got from NIN.com. Post helpful reminders and general pieces of advice you've given to yourself that you'd be willing to share here.

Note to self: Only post in Internet forums and social networking sites when you're happy, comfortable, and relaxed with more than enough free time to spare.

[DF118]

Immediately stop drinking when you realize you've started to remember things from your last blackout.

[Big Fat Matt]

Do NOT eat mexican food food before a punk show.




When you are so drunk that you try and open a pack of cigarettes SIDEWAYS, you need to go to bed.

[theimage13]

Note to self: the awkward, unpopular kids in high school will be the ones hiring the trendy, popular kids in about a decade. Be happy to be the odd one.

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: Infatuation is NOT love. (Times Infinity!!!)

[ryanp16]

Note to self: When it's obvious someone doesn't care about you anymore, just let go.

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: School is about getting a JOB, which means having a chance at earning a living which is EVERYTHING about SURVIVAL and gaining a sense of PRIDE and having a reason to wake up in the morning. Just cut the bull and get shit done!

(I wish this was hammered into to my head way before I turned 13.)

-Don't get me wrong though. I see how school can be about other things, including developing social skills, finding your niche in terms of your occupational endeavors and overall career path, and learning how to properly function in a civilized society, which is AKA staying out of trouble and prison.-

Oh yeah, and for another note to self.

Note to self: Stop doing things that will require you to forgive yourself.

But of course, it's never that simple. It would be nice if I was able to completely do that though. :p

[pigpen]

note to self: If it smells like shit, it's probably shit and you should leave it alone.

[Charmingly Miserable]

Note to self: Infatuation is NOT love. (Times Infinity!!!)


Note to self: When it's obvious someone doesn't care about you anymore, just let go.
Both of you guys are talking to me, right? lol

Note to self: If my future self could tell my present self anything, it would be that it's not that serious. Relax.

[playwithfire]

Don't sleep with him. Just wait a little while.

[aggroculture]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1a4C_SxvITk

But more seriously: just be patient, you'll get laid and find love in a while; focus on other stuff in the meantime instead of losing your shit.

[Halo Infinity]

aggroculture - I really needed that because it's a very subtle kind of take-over on my emotions. I'm thankful to have snapped out of it. Thanks for the words of encouragement.

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: If you have to ask, you sometimes must accept that fact that the very fact that you are asking questions immediately proves that you or whatever it is that you're asking about is wrong. Controversial, moral, ethical, personal, hypothetical, and rhetorical questions are often asking for trouble. This also includes questions that are intended to figure out other people's personalities and motives. Sometimes it's better to just remain quiet, let it go, forget about it, mind your own business, leave others alone, and walk away. Always think before you ask, and remember to do your best to not rock the boat.

And last, but definitely not least, don't even think that you can also sugarcoat such questions in a presentable and appropriate manner. There's just no way. Just drop it as soon as you notice that it can't be done.

[Lew]

nts: crotch fever doth not a long term situation make.

[gorast]

Note to Self: She'll turn into someone very, very ugly on the inside. Let her go the first time she knocks you down, instead of the eighth.

[Fixer808]

Hey, me in the future, listen up. I want a ham sandwich. But a GOOD one, from a nice deli.

[dlb]

Call her dlb you idiot, call her!

[frankie teardrop]

Hey, me in the future, listen up. I want a ham sandwich. But a GOOD one, from a nice deli.

ham is a little dry.

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: Don't feel so bad for not saying anything or that much in social settings when you're not ignoring the other person or people surrounding you. There is also no reason to feel bad about not smiling or laughing in social settings either. As long as you're not frowning, or giving people dirty looks, you shouldn't be at fault for keeping a straight face. Don't allow people to make you feel bad for such things. Refusing to show emotion is not a crime, especially among strangers.

[henryeatscereal]

If you want respect, give respect...

[binaryhermit]

This goes back to the mental health thread, but...


Note to self: those medications you're on are prescribed for a reason and bad things happen when you don't take them.

[Sarah K]

Some friendships deserve second chances. People can make mistakes and still be good. Holding grudges over petty shit gets you nowhere.

Also, don't start doing any drugs harder than weed. It will be the great mistake of your life, and lead to an endless shit storm of various forms of abuse, dropping out of college, and just being a general fuck up for many, many years. You will lose what are supposed to be the greatest years of your life.

[nin5in]

Just because they are relatives, does not mean they deserve to stay in your life. You have to cut the toxic people out, relatives or not.
Quit giving a fuck about what people think about you

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: People grow apart sooner and more than you think. You don't have to wait until you're around ages 30 to 40 to see people actually leaving your home-town. That can happen as early as ages 18-25 as far as early adulthood goes. Try not to get too surprised when you see that happen to other people's social circles as well. That's actually normal, since college degrees and marriages literally take people places, even if that means relocating to a new home in a different city, state, or country.

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: Fake it until you make it. Literally and seriously. No truer words can be said in the real world. You have to stop your absolutely silent and absolutely direct approaches to life. (This thread was actually helping me, but I thought I'd at least bump this thread on more time for the road in regards to this piece of advice, since this shit finally hit me over the head like a ton of bricks.)

[henryeatscereal]

You hate to trust yourself more than anything in this world.

I always repeat myself the Henry Rollins catchphrase: "You can only trust yourself and the first 4 Black Sabbath albums..."

[Halo Infinity]

Note to self: Do not act and post the exactly the same way on social-networking sites the same way you act on Internet forums. It's obviously a much more personal environment. (And yes, that's another thing that I learned late in life. I'm also speaking for myself, since things didn't seem to go so right when I acted exactly the same way on both types of sites.)

[Halo Infinity]

I know I've been bumping this thread several times, but I really wanted to get this out of my system before I forget it, so that I can look it up here again in case I actually do. This is also common sense, but my emotions have gotten the best of me many times. It's what I've learned after learning to find more ways to cope with infatuation.

Note to self: Sometimes, it's just not meant to be. You really are better off just forgetting about it, so you can actually let go and move on. If a friendship doesn't work out, just let it go and move on. You aren't doing yourself or the other person/people any favors if you keep trying to pursue something that doesn't exist, and hasn't existed. Besides, friendship should never be forced to begin with, and some things are not only better off left unsaid, but are also understood without anything having to be said in the first place. There are also more unwritten rules that you think from time to time.

This can also apply to arguments. It's true that being right can also make you miserable. If it's really not going anywhere, nor will it ever go anywhere, just stop talking about it, leave the topics alone, leave them alone, and leave them, so you can move on. The other person/people you've been arguing would probably even thank you for giving them a break for you, especially if that break has to be a permanent one. It's not like they're the only people in the world you can find. There's many other people you can try to make new friends with, and hopefully get along with. Continuing any argument like that is akin to responding to a thread that has gone to nothing but complete and absolute shit.

To sum up the whole point, if it's not meant to be, you're just better off going away.

[Ryan]

ham is a little dry.

The ham is a little dry? Damn you to hell monkey hand!

or something along those lines

/homer

[frankie teardrop]

The ham is a little dry? Damn you to hell monkey hand!

or something along those lines

/homer

the frogurt is also cursed.

[Ryan]

the frogurt is also cursed.

that's bad.




10 characters

[Lew]

romantic and sexual love are only a fraction of the love spectrum to be experienced, so why the fuck are you wasting your life trying to "understand" only those?

[Halo Infinity]

I must've either forgotten about this, or I've just learned this a few days ago. I have a feeling that I've come to this realization last year, but even then, that was also very late for me to realize it. As for what I'm talking about, this is it.

I didn't realize the importance that the role the ability to make other people smile and laugh played when it came to socializing, especially in real life. I had a hunch that it counted for dating, but was oblivious to the fact that it even counted in bonding with your friends and family, or even prospective friends and acquaintances. It was very surprising to me, as I normally don't make it a point to get other people to smile and laugh, especially in real life.

I thought that the use of humor and even merely appearing happy was mostly or even completely irrelevant, meaningless, and useless when it came to bonding with others, especially in real life. It turned out to be a much bigger deal and impact than I ever expected it to be. I knew humor made people likeable as well, but I've also had a lot of history and experiences of failing miserably at it, even until now. If it wasn't just me taking things too seriously, personally, and literally, I would also say things I shouldn't say, or just end up being annoying if not necessarily offensive. It's why I've mostly STFU when it came to humor in spite of my temptations, along with the ones that have already slipped out.

[Lew]

nts: literotica.

[Trains]

Got a question for you guys. Apologies if this isn't quite on topic; this is more like 'what would you guys do in my position or what would you not do'.

So I'm pretty much in the throes of a quarter-life-crisis and bogged down with indecision over what I should do to get out of this rut. All started when a relationship ended six months ago and as a result I moved back in with the folks temporarily, vowing to leave town and never return. Fresh start, new things, new adventures, new beginnings. The idea of travelling also pops into my head, maybe USA, maybe China. No better time, right? Young, free and single. Part of me is just itching to go book a ticket and just go somewhere. But that's not exactly long term.

So hence my indecision: I have the cash saved up, I have the motivation to leave (trust me...), I just don't know what to do first. If I go travelling, great as it'll be, I'll end up back at square one at the end of it with most of that money spent. But if I move to a new town, get a new job, build new friendships etc...well travelling's probably going to be put on hold for a while.

So if it had to be one...anyone been in a similar quater-life-crisis scenario and wanna weigh in on what you would do if you were me?

[Fixer808]

Combine them. Get a work visa for another country.

[icklekitty]

nts: literotica.

asstr.org (if it's still going)

[Lew]

asstr.org (if it's still going)

is that like a.s.b and a.s.s, from back in the day?

i love literotica. it is great.

[Lew]

icklekitty...
you are one seriously sexy woman, btw.
i was going to say thank your parents or genetics...but thank yourself, for being so damned...meow.
thanks.

[Halo Infinity]

Perhaps this kind of post can fit into this thread even though it's a very minor thing. I noticed that when most people tell other people stories, or generally talk about their lives, it's about what they did outside with other people. I hardly hear any stories about what people do when they're at home and alone, or even when they're outside and alone. That finally just occurred to me this month altogether.

[Fixer808]

A) Private time
B) "I was reading a book for 2 hours" isn't much of a tale

[Halo Infinity]

Oh I got that. (I'll certainly admit that it took me forever to finally get that, though.) I was just wondering about it when I was perusing Facebook and Twitter comments regarding personal lives. And even if it has something to do with going outside, even for something like, say, going on a hike alone, shopping alone, eating out alone, or exercising alone, they're all not much of a tale either. Oh yes, and reading books can also be replaced with playing video games too. It doesn't seem to work when it comes to those types of conversations for the very reasons you've mentioned. It just took me a while to finally realize that, among other things.

[Lew]

Perhaps this kind of post can fit into this thread even though it's a very minor thing. I noticed that when most people tell other people stories, or generally talk about their lives, it's about what they did outside with other people. I hardly hear any stories about what people do when they're at home and alone, or even when they're outside and alone. That finally just occurred to me this month altogether.

i do tons of stuff alone...my favourite was going to see nin in toronto a few years back. i got a pretty damned good seat through a nin.com member (i can't remember her name but i can visualize her avatar. lol). i like doing stuff alone, i notice more...i feel more...senses more engaged...yeah. it is rad. plus i am a voyeur, so get to watch everyone else without worry. :)

[Halo Infinity]

And yet more things that I've learned a lot later than I should've. I've even learned some of these things a few weeks ago.

There are a lot of people under 25 that are already into traveling. You don't have to wait to see people get interested in traveling around their late 20s and early 30s.

Calling people to hang out as an adult over your house without a particular occasion to hang at your house to play video games, or at least hang out at your place for a few hours, and then eat out at a restaurant or fast-food restaurant and then go home on weekends and vacations is not exactly what most 20 somethings are into, so it doesn't matter even if you try to plan something like that. That stuff really is more reserved for children and teenagers in most cases. People in their 20s are more likely to hang out at parties or things where there's an actual occasion.

(I've also grown up with friends that hung out that way for several years, but I also noticed that a lot of them stopped getting into that way of hanging out even as early as ages 16-22. That should've told me a thing or two, and it's no wonder why I was able to hang out that way with a friend like that for a lot longer than normal, because I was several years older than him, but as soon as he turned 20, chilling at each others' houses and eating at restaurants and going home wasn't his thing anymore. I also knew that people obviously grew out of sleepovers, but people normally grow out of hanging out that way too.)

People will come and go a lot sooner than you think. You really don't have to wait until you're 27-35+ to start even seeing some of your closest friends move to a different town, city, state, or country. Interests and agreements can also change in way under 5 years.

It also doesn't take marriage and children to separate single friends. Even a serious relationship will take care of that, and you shouldn't just expect your friend to hang out with you the same way he/she did when he/she was single. Do not expect him/her to simply include his/her boyfriend/girlfriend to hang out with you the same exact way you used to hang out with before he/she got into a serious relationship, or to reserve a day or two just for you even if you're a best/close friend. It isn't always that simple, and mostly never is.

Having a many things in common, or even everything in common with somebody doesn't always guarantee that you'll have an excellent rapport with that particular person. Don't expect to be BFF just yet. It takes time, patience, mutual respect, acceptance, and understanding, and without any of those things, it still really goes to show that it ultimately doesn't matter even if you have everything, or most things in common.

Even if you have valid reasons to dislike/hate/distrust somebody's friend(s)/lover(s), you're better off keeping it to yourself. Don't ever expect them to be objective either. If anything, telling the truth in this case, can cost you a friendship, or several friendship.

Close/best friends will always be rarer than you think, especially as you get older.

Saying that you're not really into parties and traveling is just like saying that you don't really like kittens and puppies. :p

I just want to get one more thing out of my system for this thread. I suppose it has also calmed me down. It's also a matter of common sense, but it still took me a while to completely accept it.

I was aware that you sometimes have to lie, pretend, and keep certain things to yourself to in order to move on and/or stay out of trouble. This is also more of a reminder to myself, but I suppose I'd sometimes forget about it due to pride or having lots of intense and unresolved emotions, questions, and confusion. Playing make-believe definitely isn't reserved for small children at all. I actually asked my parents why they didn't teach me that way before I turned 13, but they also thought that I would've figured it out on my own. (I'm the type of person that needs/prefers to have things explained to him.) I actually get what they meant, since most people learn that on their own, but I kept thinking that being direct was the best option most of the time. Sure, I was aware that being direct sometimes isn't an option, and is sometimes the worst option, but I was also unaware that you sometimes have to step up your "pretend game" 100% as a means to truly suck it up, let go, and move on, and that being direct is sometimes forbidden should you want to move on and/or stay out of trouble/danger.

It just doesn't prevent you from getting arrested, incarcerated, beaten up, or getting killed, but it also helps you find a job, get promoted, save you from being fired, pass a class, or prevent verbal/physical fights from happening, or it even decreases/eliminates trouble if you're already in deep shit, assuming that you're lucky enough to escape it. It could also rescue friendships and relationships. (I really was a lot more blunt when I was younger, and I didn't always do it to be rude or vengeful, but I was just reminded why pretending truly is for all ages, and that it doesn't mean that you're a liar *Even though lying is sometimes absolutely necessary for some of the reasons I've already mentioned.*, hypocrite, weak, cowardly, or a phony sycophant. Sometimes it's just being human, strong, patient, humble, self-controlled, or mature, diplomatic, peaceful, ethical, and practical for that matter.)

It's also kind funny as to how listening to Starfuckers, Inc. has also reminded me of this. I also suppose that it's sometimes completely okay and even right to play the game known as insincerity. http://www.echoingthesound.org/community/images/smilies/tongue.png

This has also further proved to me, reminded me, and taught me that the love of being right, wanting to be right, and fighting for your rights, isn't always the "right thing to do" even if you're actually right. Being right can also be aggressive, confrontational, and tactless no matter how you address it. It can even go to the point where all the fancy wording and diplomatic tones of voice in the world won't save you.

Oh dear goodness. Please pardon my rambling, but it certainly goes to show some of the stuff that I bottle up on a regular basis.

(Okay, I just had a lot on my mind with this, and thought of putting it into one post. Even though some bumping is allowed on ETS these days... it still just doesn't feel right. Anyway, it's just some stuff I've realized far too late in life again.)