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Thread: The Transgender Thread

  1. #781
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    Finally got my new state ID in the mail today with my new legally changed name (and gender marker, but that I've actually had for a while since it's a much easier process in NY than the full name change).
    Just waitin on the new SS card and birth certificate to show up.

  2. #782
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    Someone finally put it into words.

    http://www.newnownext.com/sometimes-...nster/03/2017/

  3. #783
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    I'm just going to leave this here.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/local...=.e548da156f49

  4. #784
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    Also, a black trans woman was elected to Minneapolis's city council

  5. #785
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    Happy birthday, enjoy an evening and night full of your family dead-naming you even though you spent hundreds of dollars and all year to have your name legally changed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. #786
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    ^^UGGGGHHHH.

    I wish people like that could actually experience what it feels like to be dead named. If they only knew how absolutely horrible it feels and what a terrible thing it is that they're doing.

    It's been almost a year since I cut my stepdad out of my life for this very reason. He got to spend last Thanksgiving and Christmas alone while the rest of the family hung out because both me and my brother want nothing to do with him. He thought he could be blatantly transphobic to me and refuse to use my name and correct pronouns and I would just ignore it. He found out the hard way that there are consequences to that.

    Anyway, I'm sorry you're going through that. *hugs* That's absolutely awful, and not the way anyone should have to spend their birthday, or any day, for that matter.

  7. #787
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    Just gonna leave this here:

    BERLIN — Germany must create a third gender category for people who do not identify as either male or female or were born with ambiguous sexual traits, the country’s constitutional court ruled on Wednesday, finding that binary gender designations violated the right to privacy. [...]

    The ruling arrives as society, medicine and law increasingly recognize the ways in which gender is socially constructed and not necessarily fixed or stable. [...]

    “The assignment to a gender is of paramount importance for individual identity; it typically occupies a key position both in the self-image of a person and how the person is perceived by others,” the court found. “It also protects the sexual identity of those persons who are neither male nor female.”[...]
    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/11/08/w...ory-vanja.html

  8. #788
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    Quote Originally Posted by r_z View Post
    Really nice to see the constitutional court supporting this. I hope this will set an example for the rest of Europe and the world.

    And I also hope that Merkel et al. won't be postponing their decision to change the law like they have been doing with the transgender law. There is actually a statement from 2011 where they say that they will present a new transgender law before the current legislative term ends. Which it did in 2013 and nothing had happened. Now another term has passed and still nothing. Even though the current law is a total mess, since most of the 1980 legal text has been declared as violating the constitution by the constitutional court. This includes 1 out of 3 requirements for a name change and all three additional requirements for change of the gender marker (these used to be: unmarried, sterilized, completed GRS).

    The current law still insists on a process that can take more than a year and requires two psychological reports which are positive in 99% of all cases and cost you 800 to 3000€. I just got the final decision a few weeks ago and can now finally change my name and gender marker in everything, but this was only possible because I had a spare 1000€. If you don't have this: Sucks to be you.

    The Green party had a draft for a new law based on the right to gender self-determination in their election program and since they are probably going to be a ruling party soon, I hope they will be confident enough to kick the Christian democrats' asses and enforce a new law.

  9. #789
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  10. #790
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    Well, after a very, very long three and a half years on hormones/transitioning can finally say this: I am officially full time.

    This has been a very long journey. Almost 35 years, to be exact. And I still have a long way to go in my transition, I am definitely not done, but this is a huge milestone. I have a court hearing this afternoon to legally change my name and tomorrow I head to Social Security to legally change my sex. It's kind of unreal.

  11. #791
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    Quote Originally Posted by theruiner View Post
    Well, after a very, very long three and a half years on hormones/transitioning can finally say this: I am officially full time.

    This has been a very long journey. Almost 35 years, to be exact. And I still have a long way to go in my transition, I am definitely not done, but this is a huge milestone. I have a court hearing this afternoon to legally change my name and tomorrow I head to Social Security to legally change my sex. It's kind of unreal.
    Well, congratulations! Let's hope that everything will work out in your favor!

  12. #792
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    I have my name and marker officially changed everywhere except my medical insurance. They can't just change it, I have to RE-APPLY for my health insurance and fill out ALL of the paperwork (income, etc) over again.
    I'm going to have to renew again in like 2 months anyhow, so I'm just going to wait until then.

  13. #793
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    trans idahoans can now change their name and sex on birth certificates unobstructed.

    47th state to do so. sigh. glad it's happened, anyway.

  14. #794
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    I’m still not able to get on HRT but I finally have long hair again and it makes me feel so much better in general! Almost all of the period of serious doubt I had is gone — accepting I’m not cis made it a lot easier to then accept I’m trans. I’m more aware of my dysphoria than ever but the fact that I’m aware of it makes it easier to deal with, rather than being constantly smothered by it and never being able to do anything about it because I refused to acknowledge it.

  15. #795
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    Quote Originally Posted by kleiner352 View Post
    I’m still not able to get on HRT but I finally have long hair again and it makes me feel so much better in general! Almost all of the period of serious doubt I had is gone — accepting I’m not cis made it a lot easier to then accept I’m trans. I’m more aware of my dysphoria than ever but the fact that I’m aware of it makes it easier to deal with, rather than being constantly smothered by it and never being able to do anything about it because I refused to acknowledge it.
    That is some very important insight you just gained. You have to know your fears, issues and problems to be able to overcome them. And I'm not only talking about dysphoria, but anything else that might hinder you in the future.

    Also, don't get frustrated that HRT is taking so long. While being on it is wonderful and, for most of us, necessary to feel 100% comfortable with ourselves, it is not what makes you a woman. That is completely in your own hands. And I am sure that you can do it and will do it! Also, too many trans folks think that they won't be able to pass without HRT. In my opinion, this is nonsense. I went full time more than half a year before starting HRT and once I figured out what was important regarding passing, it worked with almost everybody I encountered. Of course, now that I've been on HRT for some months, it gets even easier, but I am convinced that the majority of it was my own hard work and not those tiny little molecules. If you or anybody else reading this needs some advice, feel free to let me know!

  16. #796
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    Happy pride month to you all

  17. #797
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    So some douchebag Alabama backwoods twat tried to tell his fellow CrossFit affiliate owners not to host any events connected with the "sin" of LGBTQ pride.

    CrossFit's CEO fired him, and included this remark in an interview:

    He needs to take a big dose of ‘shut the fuck up' and hide out for awhile. It’s sad.
    https://www.buzzfeed.com/stephanieml...dZ#.dxwMr401qK

    Score one for people doing the right thing in the face of finding out their spokesman is a horrific waste of flesh.

  18. #798
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    I read this entire thread today because it hit me that I had never peeked into it and that I should. Seeing what some of you have been through and are working on was just awe inspiring. I teared up at some of what I read and it was so informative and beneficial for me as a person who thinks of herself as a trans ally.

    Reading what it feels like to experience gender dysphoria was exactly as awful as I had always imagined it to be. When I look back on my childhood, I believe I dealt with very mild gender dysphoria, as I did feel like a boy in a girl's body. I eventually came to feel very comfortable as a woman, but little kid me identifies just a little bit in my own small way.
    Last edited by piggy; 06-08-2018 at 11:44 PM.

  19. #799
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    preach

  20. #800
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    ^^
    That's it. We offend their delicate, fragile, narrow-minded world view.

    On a related note, my stepdad (who is super transphobic and not in my life any more because of it) apparently complained to my sister (that thinks he's an idiot) that this country is "getting too progressive." I lol'd.

  21. #801
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    About to go join a counter-protest/safety block at a Drag Queen story time reading at my city's library because there are literal Nazis coming to protest/harass/intimidate people going to it and NOT ON MY WATCH NAZI FUCKS.

  22. #802
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    Transgenderism is just another fad. Whether or not there is a legitimate mental condition where a person feels like their physical body doesn't match their sex is irrelevant and it's obvious that 90% of the cases today aren't of people with any sort of actual mental condition but just people who want to LARP as the opposite sex. I tried the whole transgender thing, it wasn't a spur of the moment decision and it was not driven by anything external, I just wanted to be a girl but I realized that your physical appearance and characteristics are just background noise, not something you focus on every moment of your life or at all, it's like the color of your hair or your preference for cruisine or what makes you tick or what drives you. Also, you can't have "gender dysphoria", you aren't a gender you're a sex, gender and what we perceive as man/woman are just societal and not anything neurological. Being female doesn't mean you prefer to dress a particular way or have long hair, the same for males. Transgender people go out of their way to modify their bodies to assume a societal stereotype of what a person of a particular sex should be and that's sad. With all that said, there are differences between males and females, their possess certain behavioral and neurological traits that are unique to their sex that have evolved to be a certain way over time as humanity has evolved, there are brain differences. Until there is sufficient scientific proof that a person who is born with certain chromosomes but a brain that developed traits of the opposite sex is proven then you can say there is no such thing as trannsexualism and even if they did you couldn't really classify a person as being "trans" male or female just because their brain mimics the opposite sex, if anything it's just another form of hermaphroditism.

  23. #803
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    Hi.

    Okay, so, to start I'd like to respond to a few specific points in your post.

    Quote Originally Posted by IwakuraLain View Post
    Also, you can't have "gender dysphoria", you aren't a gender you're a sex
    Nope, you're both. Gender is the social construct of the characteristics that we associate with sex. Historically, sex was considered binary: male and female. Gender was the social and cultural differences of the sexes, vs. the biological ones.

    gender and what we perceive as man/woman are just societal and not anything neurological
    Sorta! Our brains are hugely informed by a multitude of external factors. A person can't argue for any big factors of our identity being purely "nature" or "out ---> in." That's just not how being a person works. Gender almost certainly has brain-connotations, but it's not helpful to require those or to hold to that as a standard. Just like with most mental states and parts of our identiy

    Transgender people go out of their way to modify their bodies to assume a societal stereotype of what a person of a particular sex should be and that's sad.
    I'd say most people do, right? Like, being a butch woman is hardly that common.

    With all that said, there are differences between males and females, their possess certain behavioral and neurological traits that are unique to their sex that have evolved to be a certain way over time as humanity has evolved, there are brain differences.
    Way, way, way less than you'd think. And again, you have to account for external factors, changes in body chemistry, all sorts of stuff that isn't constrained to any particular assigned sex at birth.

    Until there is sufficient scientific proof that a person who is born with certain chromosomes but a brain that developed traits of the opposite sex is proven then you can say there is no such thing as trannsexualism and even if they did you couldn't really classify a person as being "trans" male or female just because their brain mimics the opposite sex, if anything it's just another form of hermaphroditism.
    You're misunderstanding gender and sex characteristics pretty severely here. You're also misusing the term hermaphroditism.


    ....


    ........

    So with all that said.

    Hi.

    What was the point of you coming in this thread and making this post? Was it to like... discuss the legitimacy of being trans? Because like, this is pretty clearly a thread occupied by trans people, right? Was it to invalidate them and make them feel bad? What was your goal?

  24. #804
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    Quote Originally Posted by playwithfire View Post
    Was it to invalidate them and make them feel bad?
    i'll take "the reason that jerk came into this thread" for $400, alex!

    sorry, i've been watching a lot of jeopardy.

  25. #805
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    Quote Originally Posted by playwithfire View Post

    Hi.

    What was the point of you coming in this thread and making this post? Was it to like... discuss the legitimacy of being trans? Because like, this is pretty clearly a thread occupied by trans people, right? Was it to invalidate them and make them feel bad? What was your goal?
    yeah that's what I was trying to figure out. Good god.
    @playwithfire , you have the patience of a saint.

  26. #806
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    Nah, I don't, this is just how I get my Aries bullshit out without having it bleed over into my meatspace life. But thanks!

  27. #807
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    This was incredibly powerful.

    https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/22/o...ex-policy.html

    Republican parents of transgender children will now find their trans sons and daughters endangered by freshly empowered bullies. How will those parents react when their vulnerable, frightened children come home in tears — or bruised, or not at all? Will these children make the choice of Leelah Alcorn, who decided that rather than live in such a world, she would throw herself beneath the wheels of a truck?

    Don’t like this world? Well, you could have left us alone.

  28. #808
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    hi

    came out little over a year ago

    moved out of the country that has elected fascism where everyone i know and care for lives

    living in the uk now and trying to get into the infamous NHS waiting list to transition

    doing uni (blessed with the opportunity) for music production & working full time

    sort of not existing

    sort of running out of ideas

    not comfortable talking to my old friends or girlfriend about it

    just figured this would be a more comfortable space in half anonymity

    really happy for people in this thread that have pulled through in their journey

  29. #809
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    Welcome! The idealist in me is happy that you were able to get the hell out of what I presume is the US, but I'm sad that it takes such drastic measures these days. Sounds like you've got an amazing opportunity ahead of you though (both personally and professionally). Good luck with all of your endeavors!

  30. #810
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    it's brazil actually, which i think is headong somewhere worse than the us. but thank you lots for the kind words. i really do hope stuff works out from here on out

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