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richardp
12-01-2011, 08:13 AM
This needed to return.

In March of this year, my car was stolen, and later found with the ignition completely ripped out. I ended up just buying a family member's slightly better car off of them, since they was planning on getting a new car anyway, instead of fixing my stolen car.

THEN, in September of this year, I was involved in an accident on the highway that totaled THAT car. So after bumming rides for a month and a half. I FINALLY got the insurance money and bought ANOTHER new car.

Flash forward to this morning. I get to my car to go to work, and sure enough, someone had taken a crowbar to the window paneling on the passenger side, ripped that out, and tried to steal my new car, by once again ripping out the ignition. AWESOME. Not only is it going to be a pain in the ass trying to get this fixed, but there's no way I will be able to afford my insurance now.

I have the worst luck with cars.

nascentia
12-01-2011, 08:34 AM
This needed to return.

In March of this year, my car was stolen, and later found with the ignition completely ripped out. I ended up just buying a family member's slightly better car off of them, since they was planning on getting a new car anyway, instead of fixing my stolen car.

THEN, in September of this year, I was involved in an accident on the highway that totaled THAT car. So after bumming rides for a month and a half. I FINALLY got the insurance money and bought ANOTHER new car.

Flash forward to this morning. I get to my car to go to work, and sure enough, someone had taken a crowbar to the window paneling on the passenger side, ripped that out, and tried to steal my new car, by once again ripping out the ignition. AWESOME. Not only is it going to be a pain in the ass trying to get this fixed, but there's no way I will be able to afford my insurance now.

I have the worst luck with cars.

Ugh, that sucks man. Are the ignition thefts happening in your driveway, a parking lot..? Maybe a cheap way to try and deter that shit is to buy one of those fake surveillance cameras and stick it somewhere looking at your car? Or if it's happening in your driveway, a motion activated light maybe.

Did your insurance go up last time this happened? It doesn't seem like it should, since theft issues are covered under comprehensive policies and are non-moving.

For my complaint of the day...my fiancee got me tickets to the Raiders/Dolphins game this Sunday in Miami. I've never been to a football game, and the Raiders have been my team my whole life, so I've been super excited about this. She had the days off and everything.

This morning her boss called and told her she can't have the weekend off, even though he already previously told her she could. We're both pissed. She's taking sick days if it comes to it, but he's a dick and I hope he gets stung by a lot of bees.

iamanexit
12-01-2011, 09:17 AM
You can buy fake surveillance cameras to just stick places?
This changes everything.

richardp
12-01-2011, 09:54 AM
Ugh, that sucks man. Are the ignition thefts happening in your driveway, a parking lot..? Maybe a cheap way to try and deter that shit is to buy one of those fake surveillance cameras and stick it somewhere looking at your car? Or if it's happening in your driveway, a motion activated light maybe.

Did your insurance go up last time this happened? It doesn't seem like it should, since theft issues are covered under comprehensive policies and are non-moving.

The insurance didn't go up the first time my car was stolen, but it definitely went up after the accident in September. I'm assuming that a third time would make it go higher. I REALLY hope that isn't the case, but I have a feeling that it might be.

And the first time it happened, it was parked outside of my mom's house. This time it was parked in front of my apartment building. There is off street parking in the back of the building, but it was full last night when I got home so I had to park on the street out front. I live in the city, so I mean, it was destined to happen. I'm probably just going to get a club now after I get this fixed. It just kind of stings, because this car is so new, I JUST got the tags and plates for it like last week.

Iran_Ed
12-07-2011, 02:23 PM
When I arrived at work this morning, I thought I was the first person there. When I opened the door to go in the security alarm didn't go off which is strange. I make my way to the back of the store to find the back outside door open. I go into the manager's office and find the bank deposit for last night cut open and in the trash. The police think my manager was jumped on her way in this morning and made to open the safe. Nobody has heard from her and she is believed to be in danger.She always gets there earlier than me, and this was around 5:30 in the morning so nobody saw anything.

ItsJustDave
12-07-2011, 03:16 PM
The police think my manager was jumped on her way in this morning and made to open the safe. Nobody has heard from her and she is believed to be in danger.She always gets there earlier than me, and this was around 5:30 in the morning so nobody saw anything.
Fuck! That's horrible.

richardp
12-07-2011, 09:01 PM
Fuck! That's horrible.

Holy shit... I seriously hope she's found and is ok. I'm a manager and every time I'm in the store alone I always fear this will happen.

ManBurning
12-08-2011, 01:18 AM
Well, last night my PC died. It was pretty much on life support since summer 2009.
It totally crashed and won't even power back on now. The power supply light is on at the back when you put the plug in, but you can slam the power button down all day long and it won't turn on, so that kinda ruined my night. Today I went computer shopping to get another, which set me back $400, don't really have the cash to be sparing at the moment, especially after Christmas shopping and whatnot, but a Computer is a necessity.

Hopefully I can salvage whatever I have on my old hard-drive, that's what I am mainly concerned about at this point. I have an external HD, but i'm not as proactive at transfering files on there that I should be, so I lst a good 3 months of stuff or so.

I should have seen this coming though, it was inevitable that this was going to happen, I mentioned that it's ben on the fritz for about 2 yrs now. Back in 2009 i restarted it and it got stuck on the start up screen for 2 days, no joke. It just sat there and was trying to boot up, finally did after 2 days of trying. At that point I figured, OK... I cant restart or turn this thing off EVER or else I run the risk of it never coming back on, so it was basically on 24hrs a day for almost 2 years. Sometimes I would restart it, but never ever return the system off fully, until last night as I was rebooting after installing some updates and such and it just didn' want to load back up.

aurelius
12-08-2011, 01:28 AM
Fuuuuuuuck. My boyfriend is having a flare-up of MS. At least this time it seems to be slowly gaining momentum instead of hitting all at once. He really doesn't want me to see him like this. He was having a lot of difficulty walking, one leg is numb, and he can't feel his hands. All I can do is hold him and tell him I love him.

playwithfire
12-08-2011, 01:43 AM
Holy shit... I seriously hope she's found and is ok. I'm a manager and every time I'm in the store alone I always fear this will happen.

Yeah, I open at my job often enough and it's crossed my mind before as I usually do get there early. Thankfully I work in a building with security and I have a good view of the street to see that it's clear when I unlock the door. That said, my coworkers haven't set the alarm quite a few times on me. If it's not set this morning when I go in I'm so not going to be pleased. I really hope she turns up okay.

Iran_Ed
12-08-2011, 10:15 PM
When I arrived at work this morning, I thought I was the first person there. When I opened the door to go in the security alarm didn't go off which is strange. I make my way to the back of the store to find the back outside door open. I go into the manager's office and find the bank deposit for last night cut open and in the trash. The police think my manager was jumped on her way in this morning and made to open the safe. Nobody has heard from her and she is believed to be in danger.She always gets there earlier than me, and this was around 5:30 in the morning so nobody saw anything.

It turns out it wasn't a robbery, she took it and tried to make it look like one. Back in the 90's she was an addict and had kicked the habit, unfortunately an asshole customer of our who's a known drug dealer found out about this. He gave her a free sample and she just wasn't strong enough to resit. I've been employed there for almost three years, she's the second manager to do this, and the forth person in four months to be fired for stealing. It sucks to feel like your the most honest person on your job, and everyone else can't be trusted. Its just sad really, she was doing so well.

krush
12-08-2011, 10:42 PM
I got my store to #1 in the district on a new project I am in charge of this year, that I have dealt with by myself way more than I should have to. It's not supposed to be one person handling every aspect of it, as that would be not be humanly possible. So what I'm saying is that I beat 20+ teams of other people by myself.

What was said to me today? More complaints about trivial bullshit regarding it. Zero acknowledgements. Not like I should have expected anything else.

Now I'm going to go throw up and be ill some more.

richardp
12-10-2011, 01:19 AM
It turns out it wasn't a robbery, she took it and tried to make it look like one. Back in the 90's she was an addict and had kicked the habit, unfortunately an asshole customer of our who's a known drug dealer found out about this. He gave her a free sample and she just wasn't strong enough to resit. I've been employed there for almost three years, she's the second manager to do this, and the forth person in four months to be fired for stealing. It sucks to feel like your the most honest person on your job, and everyone else can't be trusted. Its just sad really, she was doing so well.

Well, that's an... interesting turn of events. Very unfortunate.
Where is it that you work?

Iran_Ed
12-10-2011, 01:48 AM
Well, that's an... interesting turn of events. Very unfortunate.
Where is it that you work?


Happiest place on earth (http://www.familydollar.com/)

We are currently under our forth manager this calender year. To put it into perspective, our new manager has only been with the company for three months.
I always tell my coworkers that this company dose horrible things to good people. It started out as a joke, but it isn't anymore. I've been there since March of 2009
and I could write a book about the ways they fuck people over.


(http://www.familydollar.com)

butters
12-15-2011, 06:42 PM
Anyone every done jury duty? A milti-day trial?

I just finished one and while my day wasn't as fucked as the guy on trial, I feel like shit. I was the "alternate juror" (number 13) so I sat through the trial, got the info, formed a heartfelt opinion, and was dismissed while the "regular 12" jurors decided the verdict without me. Needless to say their decision was the opposite of mine.

Dude got 10yrs in jail right in from of me and I didn't have a chance to say shit. Couldn't voice my doubts to the other jurors. I feel fucking horrible.

Dra508
12-15-2011, 08:41 PM
Anyone every done jury duty? A milti-day trial?

I just finished one and while my day wasn't as fucked as the guy on trial, I feel like shit. I was the "alternate juror" (number 13) so I sat through the trial, got the info, formed a heartfelt opinion, and was dismissed while the "regular 12" jurors decided the verdict without me. Needless to say their decision was the opposite of mine.

Dude got 10yrs in jail right in from of me and I didn't have a chance to say shit. Couldn't voice my doubts to the other jurors. I feel fucking horrible.Wow. That does suck.

So, getting that "where are you?, how you doing" email from my Dad pales...... fuuuuuuck.

theruiner
12-15-2011, 10:24 PM
Anyone every done jury duty? A milti-day trial?

I just finished one and while my day wasn't as fucked as the guy on trial, I feel like shit. I was the "alternate juror" (number 13) so I sat through the trial, got the info, formed a heartfelt opinion, and was dismissed while the "regular 12" jurors decided the verdict without me. Needless to say their decision was the opposite of mine.

Dude got 10yrs in jail right in from of me and I didn't have a chance to say shit. Couldn't voice my doubts to the other jurors. I feel fucking horrible.Holy shit, dude. I'm really sorry to hear that. I know it probably won't help, and I'm not trying to invalidate the way you feel, but you have nothing to feel bad about. It was completely out of your control.

I know you know that, but sometimes it helps to hear it from others. Hang in there.

butters
12-16-2011, 07:24 PM
Thanks you two. ^^^ I definitely know there's nothing to feel bad for. I guess the guy shouldn't have gotten himself into shit again. But, after being in such a bad place for so long, he really turned his life around about 7 yrs ago and seems to be doing well. (I googled him and his story in court appears quite true.) Sucks that it was all for not since now he'll be locked away for the next 10 years. Hope he doesn't regret fixing his life and revert back when he gets out. I'll just assume he doesn't regret it and quit thinking about it.

sublimaze
12-16-2011, 08:06 PM
One of my patients today, who we knew had heart issues already, threw all kinds of interesting arrythmias at us during a femur repair. What got me pissed off is that after us scrambling around trying to keep her heart from going kaput, she whined like crazy after she woke up. Not just pain, but all the wires and the oxygen mask, etc. Pissed me off. She was picky about where we put the IV. Well, guess what, biaatch? I felt like putting one in your right elbow to piss you off. But I didn't. I was soooooo glad to turn her over tto

richardp
01-14-2012, 07:18 PM
This (http://www.nbcactionnews.com/dpp/news/region_missouri/independence/independence-center-shut-down-after-shooting) happened tonight at work. It was insane. Thankfully my store is upstairs above where it happened, but it was still crazy. All I saw were people running and screaming and then locked the doors immediately. Unreal.

Fixer808
01-14-2012, 07:32 PM
Holy shit, that's crazy!! Glad nothing happened to you!

Hula
01-28-2012, 08:37 AM
We had my cat put to sleep today. She hasn't been 100% for a while now and she got really bad over the past few days; the vet offered to give her a painkiller to see how she got on over the weekend but it was pretty obvious she was only going to keep suffering. This was the most humane thing we could do for her.

I just can't believe that's it.

Elke
01-28-2012, 08:40 AM
Oh Hula, sweetie, I'm sorry for you. I know how horrible it is to have to do that.

metaphysical_belle
01-28-2012, 03:39 PM
to answer the question of the thread straight: very ;//

redshoewearer
01-29-2012, 10:58 AM
We had my cat put to sleep today. She hasn't been 100% for a while now and she got really bad over the past few days; the vet offered to give her a painkiller to see how she got on over the weekend but it was pretty obvious she was only going to keep suffering. This was the most humane thing we could do for her.

I just can't believe that's it.

I'm so sorry - we had a cat die in October. We love our cats so much that it is very hard isn't it. But I do believe that you did the kind thing. I bet your kitty had a great life with you.

ibanez33
01-30-2012, 05:49 AM
My dad called me this morning to let me know my cat, who I've had since I was 4 years old, had a stroke, and wasn't going to be around too long. I managed to get over there just in time to spend his last few minutes with him. I've since spent the last 15 hours hating everything about everything.

Hula
01-30-2012, 06:18 AM
My dad called me this morning to let me know my cat, who I've had since I was 4 years old, had a stroke, and wasn't going to be around too long. I managed to get over there just in time to spend his last few minutes with him. I've since spent the last 15 hours hating everything about everything.

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh I'm so sorry to hear that, man. At least you got to spend that last little bit of time with him, though; I know it doesn't seem like much but at least he wasn't alone.

marodi
01-30-2012, 04:16 PM
Hula, Garrett: I'm so very sorry about your loss. *hugs*

anita
02-03-2012, 10:18 PM
One of my cats isn't urinating, and is clearly uncomfortable and in pain. I can't take him to the vet until the morning, because I just noticed it before I was heading to my overnight shift. Blah. I hope he does ok until then.

sublimaze
02-04-2012, 08:58 PM
One of my cats isn't urinating, and is clearly uncomfortable and in pain. I can't take him to the vet until the morning, because I just noticed it before I was heading to my overnight shift. Blah. I hope he does ok until then.

Hope he's ok, anita.

Hula, I'm so sorry. Pets are furry children.

Dra508
02-04-2012, 09:15 PM
My soon to be x wants the cat out of our house. I can't have cats at my apartment.

allegro
02-04-2012, 10:11 PM
Cats are easy to have without a landlord or management company knowing. Sneak in kitty.

anita
02-04-2012, 10:15 PM
Hope he's ok, anita.

Hula, I'm so sorry. Pets are furry children.

Thanks. He's at the animal hospital until Monday. He had a urethral blockage. They had to sedate and catheterize him. I feel bad because he's in a kennel. He usually sleeps in my bed or my roommate's bed. Le sigh.

Dra508
02-05-2012, 08:18 AM
Cats are easy to have without a landlord or management company knowing. Sneak in kitty.Unfortunately, I travel a lot so alone kitty is a dead kitty. I just know why you'd separate the cat from the dog. They might be different species, but they do keep each other company. I think they'd miss each other.

allegro
02-05-2012, 08:44 PM
Oh, they would miss each other, absolutely. My Sammy (cat) and Cookie (dog) are best friends. They both came from the same house to our house, but Cookie lived with us at least a year before we brought Sammy over, and they definitely missed each other, it was so sweet when they were reunited.

And your cat will definitely be lonely without a friend.

Does your ex hate the cat or is he just being a dick to fuck with you?



Anita: i've had a few male cats with that same urethral blockage, I hope he gets better soon.

Torgo
02-06-2012, 10:40 PM
My great grandma died today (at the ripe old age of 102). We weren't close or anything (she was always nice, although a bit senile / at a younger age, I think I was afraid of her glass eye), but besides feeling a bit sad, it's also one of those moments that abruptly reminds you that life is finite and I'm finding myself being pulled toward a re-evaluation of how I've lived so far.

icklekitty
02-06-2012, 11:24 PM
I did that when my granny died. Things are so much brighter on the other side :)

Dra508
02-07-2012, 05:31 PM
Oh, they would miss each other, absolutely. My Sammy (cat) and Cookie (dog) are best friends. They both came from the same house to our house, but Cookie lived with us at least a year before we brought Sammy over, and they definitely missed each other, it was so sweet when they were reunited.

And your cat will definitely be lonely without a friend.

Does your ex hate the cat or is he just being a dick to fuck with you?
I'm going to go with the he's bing a dick to fuck with me. He's in the emotional stage. He think the cat pisses in the cellar, but has never been able to find the evidence. I think it's his stinky ice hockey equipment, but who am I?

The animals are staying together. I would love to have that cat. Henry is wicked cool cat, but I don't have the support near me to take care of him while I travel.

allegro
02-07-2012, 10:46 PM
you're certain the ex isn't going to do something bad to Henry?


edit: I make G keep his stinky ice hockey equipment in the GARAGE, ew, yuck.

Dra508
02-08-2012, 07:15 AM
you're certain the ex isn't going to do something bad to Henry?Interesting question. My immediate answer would be no. He's nice to a fault, but this relationship breaking thing really brings out the most unlikely behavior in everyone. Worst case, Henry's an indoor cat and he sneaks out and doesn't get chased. I think he's conscious would get the best of him, but like I said - strong feelings get you to do things no one would ever expect you to do. I wish a cat could talk. "Henry honey, where do you want to live? Stay with the dog and in this big house or come with Dra and go about your usual behavior of trying to trip her in the morning to get her to feed you?"
http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q265/dra508/riley-1.jpg

Yeah, I have this thing for ginger animals

Fixer808
02-08-2012, 04:20 PM
My great grandma died today (at the ripe old age of 102). We weren't close or anything (she was always nice, although a bit senile / at a younger age, I think I was afraid of her glass eye), but besides feeling a bit sad, it's also one of those moments that abruptly reminds you that life is finite and I'm finding myself being pulled toward a re-evaluation of how I've lived so far.
From what I've gleaned, you've done pretty good! Condolences nonetheless.

Tea
02-09-2012, 11:26 AM
My boss is going all fucking out on me. The last couple months she's begun to get passive aggressive with me, and when it's not passive I get blamed for doing things I was told to do directly by her. We share work, she has a bit of extra accounting on the side on day of the week- and yet everything but only a couple odd things get done by me now. She actually passed on all the daily tasks to me one by one by not telling me to do them, but getting angry at me about not doing them. So every time I pass her office, she's either on her company iPhone or on Facebook while I've got so much stuff to do I probably can't finish it in the day. So while I'm busy doing everything, she's constantly messaging me about low-priority things that haven't been done yet- she knows I'm busy and she knows she could do them in the time it takes for her to tell me this. She's been sabotaging my work- telling me specifically to do something, I do it, and then she redoes it a different way. A couple days ago, she was purposely messing up large amounts of things I was printing by changing the database in the middle of it. I asked her to stop, she said she did, then two minutes later it's fucked up again.... wasting company money. While she knows I'm very busy, she comes up to me about something that supposedly was told to us in an email she just looked at from the other day.... what? She tried telling me what I was doing was wrong because of something that didn't actually happen... then when I located what she was actually talking about (no issue in any way) she just laughs it off because all she was doing was trying to waste my time and stress me out. Because I'm not getting any help I have to constantly tell clients this week "Sorry, I don't think I can get that done for you today" when it should be no issue at all to get things to them within the hour and therefor I get shit from them on top of it. I went to hyperventilate in the bathroom yesterday. The problem is all of this is passive aggressive little things that can barely be proven, and I work in such a small company she's either fired or I leave- there can't be any fixing the issue.

Pillfred
02-09-2012, 11:32 AM
would it be hard to get a different job? Cause it sounds like the one you're at is fucked?

Tea
02-09-2012, 11:35 AM
would it be hard to get a different job? Cause it sounds like the one you're at is fucked?
I'm looking. At this point, I'd honestly be less stressed in fucking retail again.
Oh and I didn't mention that her desktop image is herself- to give a bit more of an idea of what I'm dealing with.

theruiner
02-09-2012, 11:48 AM
Tea, from someone who has had a passive-aggressive boss who does things that are purposefully ambiguous to the outside world but is fully intended to harass you in such a way that he/she can get away with it-I can sympathize. Though it sounds like you have it much worse than I did. I'm really sorry to hear you're going through all that. Working at a job you hate or is causing you an enormous amount of stress really, really sucks. I've been there, too. There are a lot of jobs that aren't much fun, but they're jobs and you get through them ok. Then there are places where it gets so awful that you wake up every morning dreading going to work, or spend your nights and weekends with it still hanging out in the back of your mind. I hope you find something else soon and can get the hell out of there. In the meantime, hang in there!

Dra508
02-09-2012, 12:31 PM
I'm looking. At this point, I'd honestly be less stressed in fucking retail again.
Oh and I didn't mention that her desktop image is herself- to give a bit more of an idea of what I'm dealing with.Sounds like she feels threatened by you. And she's a middle school mean girl. I agree, get out. No one should have to suffer like that.

Not that this is good advice, but getting passive aggressive back might make you feel better. Such as "Boss, I wasn't able to take care of that client because you have me doing XYZ" The saddest thing is that someone who has people reporting to them should understand that the people that work for them and their success is a reflection on their management and leadership. By sabotaging you, she's making herself look bad. Unfortunately, this doesn't always work because PEOPLE ARE STUPID.
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505125_162-57373051/should-i-rat-out-my-boss
If only someone was asking you.


I just spent the morning surveying three different people in my company on how they handle a particular process. All do it differently, now I have to figure out what's the best way for me. Gah. This thing, I just want to be handed the instructions and do it, but noooo, I have to think about the best way for my situation and I don't think it's what my boss is going to agree with.

Tea
02-09-2012, 07:27 PM
Tea, from someone who has had a passive-aggressive boss who does things that are purposefully ambiguous to the outside world but is fully intended to harass you in such a way that he/she can get away with it-I can sympathize. Though it sounds like you have it much worse than I did. I'm really sorry to hear you're going through all that. Working at a job you hate or is causing you an enormous amount of stress really, really sucks. I've been there, too. There are a lot of jobs that aren't much fun, but they're jobs and you get through them ok. Then there are places where it gets so awful that you wake up every morning dreading going to work, or spend your nights and weekends with it still hanging out in the back of your mind. I hope you find something else soon and can get the hell out of there. In the meantime, hang in there!
Thanks for feelin' the pain with me. This job was originally smooth sailing, couldn't have been better- go in at noon, deal with a couple requests, learn about new music, work casually on my massive spreadsheet, be able to surf the web; before I had that spreadsheet, I was even told by the company owner that I am completely fine playing video games when I have no immediate work! Gosh, I wish I could actually have time to open that spreadsheet these days. And this is the quiet-season of music events, most concerts we're getting at the moment are like four months down the road, which means everything is just going to get MUCH worse.



Sounds like she feels threatened by you. And she's a middle school mean girl. I agree, get out. No one should have to suffer like that.

Not that this is good advice, but getting passive aggressive back might make you feel better. Such as "Boss, I wasn't able to take care of that client because you have me doing XYZ" The saddest thing is that someone who has people reporting to them should understand that the people that work for them and their success is a reflection on their management and leadership. By sabotaging you, she's making herself look bad. Unfortunately, this doesn't always work because PEOPLE ARE STUPID.
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-505125_162-57373051/should-i-rat-out-my-boss
If only someone was asking you.


I just spent the morning surveying three different people in my company on how they handle a particular process. All do it differently, now I have to figure out what's the best way for me. Gah. This thing, I just want to be handed the instructions and do it, but noooo, I have to think about the best way for my situation and I don't think it's what my boss is going to agree with.
Yeah, I've come to that conclusion as well. Here's the situation- my company is owned/part of another which is also very small. It's been years since they've been "working" on getting a new version out. This isn't just about a new design, it's about making bigger music promoters be able to do a hell of a lot more and therefore want to use our service instead of just getting the smaller indie gigs. I was hired to let my boss have time to work on this new version- but if higher up isn't working on it, she has nothing to do on it. Lately if feels like the possibility of anything happening to it has died due to several factors- so we now have two people to work on the job she was doing fine on her own. But, I've proved myself to be far more tech savvy, and I have graphic skills to boot (which are being utilized). She definitely feels threatened. But, I've done everything in my power to not let her feel that way- I'm very obedient to her requests, I've said repeatedly I don't want more than a part time job (not true, but I don't want to take her job from her) and I'm just super nice in general to her and don't ever ever suck up to the higher up powers.

I've actually confronted her about several things on the side like that and if anything, it's making it worse. If I say something, she just contradicts her past-self for that special moment to argue against me. She's said things like "well I tried helping you with that" What? How on earth did you try helping? Did you psychically have a conversation with my subconscious and my subconscious told you that it's okay, I'll do all the work? She's just fucking with me about EVERYTHING. No honesty or pity will shine through. This was a conversation we had yesterday- she messages me with "oh i'm so BORED today!" I tell her I could use help if she's not busy and her response was "you can get it done just fine :)"

I do want to talk to the company owner. Not to tattle on her to make her behave because our work relationship is far too intertwined (and she's totally the type to poison your food), but to tell him what he's going to be dealing with when I find a new job. He's a super nice guy, and I feel bad for him if she's bringing down his company.

jessamineny
02-09-2012, 08:10 PM
Tea: Keep copies of e-mail exchanges like that. Write down conversations that the two of you have. Keep a log of all the work you do each day. Document, document, document.

allegro
02-09-2012, 08:29 PM
^^^ Yes! And then you'll have proof when you tell the owner (which you should do).

Harry Seaward
02-09-2012, 08:42 PM
I got tons of downvotes on reddit. =(

Torgo
02-09-2012, 09:50 PM
From what I've gleaned, you've done pretty good! Condolences nonetheless.

Thanks Fixer808! You always brighten my day!

RocketScience
02-15-2012, 03:11 PM
So I got mugged by these two fucking punks. Fuck, I'm such a pussy. I'm still shocked over it, it still hasn't settled in.

sentient02970
02-15-2012, 03:21 PM
So I got mugged by these two fucking punks. Fuck, I'm such a pussy. I'm still shocked over it, it still hasn't settled in.
Not a pussy...a victim. Glad you're OK. It may help to remind yourself of that: you're OK!! Sorry this happened.

RocketScience
02-16-2012, 05:20 AM
I do realize this isn't the movies, I can't really go all badass on these fuckers and emerge victorious and shit. I'm still bewildered, was there anything I could've done differently? Something so that I wouldn't have to be a victim. I feel really anxious walking around outside today, I hope this won't last and put me in PTSD mode. Maybe if I had acted differently I wouldn't have to feel this way. Shit, 16 hours later and it still hasnt' settled in.

Edit: I hope everyone here doesn't mind me venting my shit like this. Y'all seem like smart folk, I think this is a pretty good place to get off of shit.

DF118
02-16-2012, 08:04 AM
Tea, I was in this exact same situation- an office of around 5 and a boss who was absolute poison. All that happened was that 3 out of the 5 people quit at the same time. Myself included. If you're in a situation in which you're completely vilified, ostracised and treated horribly, sometimes the only way to win is by quitting. You might feel like it's the principle of the thing, or that you don't want to give her the satisfaction, but the truth is that the good people move on to newer pastures, it's the bad apples who are left behind, complaining and whining and wallowing in their own shit.

redshoewearer
02-16-2012, 08:31 AM
I do realize this isn't the movies, I can't really go all badass on these fuckers and emerge victorious and shit. I'm still bewildered, was there anything I could've done differently? Something so that I wouldn't have to be a victim. I feel really anxious walking around outside today, I hope this won't last and put me in PTSD mode. Maybe if I had acted differently I wouldn't have to feel this way. Shit, 16 hours later and it still hasnt' settled in.

Edit: I hope everyone here doesn't mind me venting my shit like this. Y'all seem like smart folk, I think this is a pretty good place to get off of shit.

Of course we don't mind! That is a terrible thing that happened to you, and it wasn't your fault, even if we always think what we could have done differently. It would be only natural to feel bad after this happening. You might want to talk to a counselor. I probably would if it happened to me.

sentient02970
02-16-2012, 08:42 AM
Someone my wife knows was recently mugged at a mall. I was like "the mall"??? But it was more like a group of kids who look like your average everyday mallrats followed her friend all the way to the garage and then jumped her there. This stuff happens and you can be sure you'll ask yourself a MILLION times what you could have done differently but really there may be little you could have done. Don't beat yourself up, just be safe and know not everyone is going to be out to get you.

RocketScience
02-16-2012, 03:51 PM
Today walking home I was feeling all angsty and frail. Suddenly I hear my name being called. I turned in fear and felt awed for a moment that a good friend from back in high school had called out to me. Instant relief and I could walk home safely.

When I came home yesterday I immediately went out again to have a smoke. I broke down crying a bit for myself. I didn't know shit could trigger me like that, I thought I'd be more robust after which I felt incredible shame. Today I found myself looking around my shoulder quite a lot. Shit, this shit is leaving scars... everyone's a potential assailant.

Those eyes man... fuck those eyes. Those eyes were just pure fucking evil. Today I had no thoughts of me torturing him for the mental abuse he caused or any such thing. He was merely born like that. Pure evil. Evil fucking eyes man.

It's baffling how he decided to go after me. Upon first contact he instantly said I had messed with his sister and that he wanted to fuck me up. Can you fucking imagine that. Hostile fucking intentions, instantly. At least he let his purpose known. I just cannot see how such evil can exist. And I didn't remember this until today but further he grabbed my scarf and clenched his fist against my throat. Shit shit shit, fucking evil. All the while claiming that I had messed with his sister. I ask him to call his fucking sister and let her identify me. He starts dialing, says the cell phone won't call. I decide to call instead. I start calling and he says you're not speaking to my fucking sister. At this point all I want to show these two fuckers is that I didn't mess with anyone's goddamn fucking sister. So I just hand him the phone. Soon I will be proven innoscent. He starts talking, walks away a bit, runs away. And the funny thing is, I'm thinking "oh, they were just stealing my phone, at least I didn't mess with anyone's sister :D".

Pure fucking evil... can't bother with this looking over my shoulders.

You guys, thanks so much for existing. No one here in Stockholm can't seem to process what I have to tell. Thanks for all your help.

allegro
02-16-2012, 08:37 PM
Did you go to the police? These guys have your phone, there must be some way of tracking them.

Best way to start feeling better is to empower yourself, tell the police, try to CATCH the criminals and make them pay society for their crime. They're not "evil" - they're common criminals, thugs. In Chicago, they shoot you or beat the shit out of you for an iPhone. My former stepdaughter's throat was slit while walking from class at school to her car downtown - for her wallet with nothing in it. (She survived.) Stockholm has a LOT less crime than Chicago, though. At least you have a good chance of catching these guys. Before they do it again to somebody else. Empower yourself, and save somebody else. You'll start to feel better a lot faster.

sentient02970
02-16-2012, 08:51 PM
Bad night tonight. All started thanks to my bank fucking up again and not letting me access my funds after banking hours (both ATM and debit) for the second night in a row. I talked to them today about it and they just said sorry bank system "glitch". So of course it happens tonight when I've got $200 worth of groceries at the check-out which I had to leave there. So panic sets in because my wife needed groceries to bake my daughters birthday cupcakes for school tomorrow. We scrap up some cash and I miss the exit on the way to get it at another store. Wife is livid....were basically separated and she is so done with any love or syth b pathy for me so she jumps all over me for this. Then of course when she asks if we have cooking oil at home I guess wrong and am sent back out after that tonight. I feel like I'm having a huge breakdown in my ability to cope..even for basic shit like this. Lonely, panicked and just out of control. Almost made one of those emergency calls to my therapist but writg this rant seems to have calmed me down. No wonder my wife can't stand me.

allegro
02-16-2012, 09:11 PM
Bad night tonight. All started thanks to my bank fucking up again and not letting me access my funds after banking hours (both ATM and debit) for the second night in a row. I talked to them today about it and they just said sorry bank system "glitch". So of course it happens tonight when I've got $200 worth of groceries at the check-out which I had to leave there. So panic sets in because my wife needed groceries to bake my daughters birthday cupcakes for school tomorrow. We scrap up some cash and I miss the exit on the way to get it at another store. Wife is livid....were basically separated and she is so done with any love or syth b pathy for me so she jumps all over me for this. Then of course when she asks if we have cooking oil at home I guess wrong and am sent back out after that tonight. I feel like I'm having a huge breakdown in my ability to cope..even for basic shit like this. Lonely, panicked and just out of control. Almost made one of those emergency calls to my therapist but writg this rant seems to have calmed me down. No wonder my wife can't stand me.
You gotta go shove a pole up that bank's ass, dude! That's total fucking bullshit!!

And it's NOT your fault. If your wife "hates you" because your bank fucks up, your wife has some other issues.

But, that bank shit is bullshit; you have enough stress as it is, don't let them get away with it. Empower yourself.

Dra508
02-16-2012, 09:26 PM
It's baffling how he decided to go after me. Upon first contact he instantly said I had messed with his sister and that he wanted to fuck me up. So was this a pure stranger who mistook you for some guy who messed with his sister or did you actually know this guy?

Either way, you probably will feel better if you try to do something about it. Report it.

sentient - I'm sorry you had a shit day. :( I was told early on by a bunch of folks, -here and IRL probably you too) that it's a process and you are going to have good days and bad and that you can't beat yourself up too much. So easy for me to say - I barely held it together today myself. I moved my direct deposit for my pay to my new checking account and email my soon-to-be X. I told him I put my entire salary back into our joint account and kept the sales comp - yeah it was more then the biweekly pay, but I got rent and bills to pay now and I've taken very very little out of our joint account. I received an email back that he was "not pleased by this announcement". That "we need to trust each other. " What? Trust? You already don't trust me, why would me taking my income further your lack of trust in me? Yeah I know, someone is feeling out of control and trying to control. Why do men feel like they need to control me? Am I THAT untrustworthy - don't answer that.

RocketScience
02-17-2012, 04:01 AM
The messing with his sister was just a ruse to get me confused. I have never before seen any of the two guys. I instantly called the police when I came home, it's amazing the things you remember whilst under distress, I was actually able to give the police the phone number I was made to dial. I'm sure the police won't do shit but at least I did my duty. Lets see if the great outdoors feels a little less hostile today. Once again, yer all wonderful people.

sentient02970
02-17-2012, 05:34 AM
Allegro - you are right it's total BS and I'm prepared to really take the bank through it this morning over it. I work to damn hard earning that to have to put up with this crap. Thanks for fueling.

Dra - you are very right about bad days. I'm just waiting on the good days as I really haven't seen those yet. Yeah maybe I'm getting into that male control trap myself and need to back off some. But ill be damned if she doesn't exhibit that same kind of control push. Oh well need to move on. Rise above...sorry you're having hell too. My ex and I have mostly gone through how we split the money. I'm set as she is to have to really scale back to make it work. He should feel lucky you're talking to him about this stuff and go from there.

allegro
02-17-2012, 10:11 AM
The messing with his sister was just a ruse to get me confused. I have never before seen any of the two guys. I instantly called the police when I came home, it's amazing the things you remember whilst under distress, I was actually able to give the police the phone number I was made to dial. I'm sure the police won't do shit but at least I did my duty. Lets see if the great outdoors feels a little less hostile today. Once again, yer all wonderful people.
You never know, sometimes they actually find these thugs. Hope so!

Because I grew up in the Detroit area and my father was from what was basically a ghetto, my father taught us Basic Street Smarts at a very young age. And those rules still hold true today. I don't imagine that Stockholm is anything that extreme, but thugs use the same process wherever they are, all over the world. Pickpockets use the same tricks all over the planet.

For instance, if somebody asks you for "change" -- they don't REALLY want change, they want you to pull out your wallet so they can steal it, without having to hit you on the head and experience the inconvenience of having to search for your wallet. Same thing with the phone: it's easier for them to make up some story to get you to pull out your phone, so they can steal your phone without having to LOOK for it. The rest of what happened to you is just to scare you, partly because that's part of their job as a thug and partly because they're probably sociopaths (probably partly the reason why they have "Thug" on their resume).

Suburbanites here in Chicago make it much easier on phone-stealing thugs because the suburbanites have their iPhones in their hands on the L or on buses all the time (and then are "SHOCKED" when a thug so easily steals it from the suburbanite's grip at a stop, the thug then disappearing out of the train and into the mass of humanity in a big city).

The other main rule of streets smarts is to be aware of your surroundings at all times (hence, no iPods, iPhones, daydreaming, etc.) Thugs choose their victims based on how distracted people are; distracted people, daydreaming people, etc., are easier targets.

So, it's far less likely that this will happen to you again because, unfortunately, you just acquired some street smarts. Without being seriously injured, thank God.

RocketScience
02-17-2012, 06:43 PM
The police might pay some mind to this as my brother is quite adamant in this matter by always updating them with new stuff he finds out. Today I went to see a friend who's had a rough past. He showed me some knives, offered me advice on pepperspray and so forth. At first I thought I could use the knife to scare possible assailants away but I eventually came to my senses that it was just my post trauma fear having a go. I'm feeling rather fine nowadays, still edgy when walking outside. Hoping this PTSD shit will pass.

Fixer808
02-17-2012, 08:51 PM
Good thing you came to your senses. Having a knife when attacked by some dudes can easily result in being stabbed by said knife when they overpower you and take it away. My advice (as learned from years of being bullied in high school) is to get some good running shoes.

RocketScience
02-18-2012, 06:16 AM
Allegro, you're quite right about being distracted. As I was walking down the street I had no idea I was being pursued by this gang as I had my headphones in and as such didn't pay any mind to my surroundings. I suppose just seeming aware will make less of an easy target.

Fixer, I had thoughts about knives and pepperspray. Knives I really don't want to use, just a means to scare people away but as you said, should I find myself overpowered things could go way wrong. With the pepperspray I could attack the robbers but since this is a very gang heavy area, I fear of any retaliation. I just want to be left alone and be safe. I highly doubt they'd want vengeance if I managed to runaway from then as opposed to injuring them. Looking into running shoes next.

Iran_Ed
02-29-2012, 02:15 AM
Happiest place on earth (http://www.familydollar.com/)

We are currently under our forth manager this calender year. To put it into perspective, our new manager has only been with the company for three months.
I always tell my coworkers that this company does horrible things to good people. It started out as a joke, but it isn't anymore. I've been there since March of 2009
and I could write a book about the ways they fuck people over.


(http://www.familydollar.com)

Another one bites the dust.

YKWYA
03-01-2012, 04:18 PM
The kind of day where, in all honesty, I wish people would stop joking about Lawyers being chained to the bottom of the ocean and actually make a start with it......

Fixer808
03-04-2012, 02:10 PM
Weeeeelp, I'm moving again. Having a nice quiet night in last night (well, as quiet as possible, given the children next suite over), drinkin' a beer and playin' computer games when all of a sudden the shouting upstairs I'd been hearing from my landlord's place spilled out into the back yard, including banging on neighbours' suite door, scuffling, and someone being shoved against the fence or outside of the house.

After arming myself with a sex whip and making sure the door was locked I called the cops, as it was most likely the dad fighting with his son. I couldn't be sure, but then I remembered Russell Peters' standup bit about East Indian dads beating their kids: "Somebody's gonna get hurt real bad".

With this knowledge in my mind I relayed what I knew to the police, tucked the sex whip up my sleeve and strolled out to the alley to smoke. As I was standing there (and trying to ignore the crazy guy who lives across the street standing in his doorway staring at me), the OTHER son rolled up to collect their doberman who had gotten loose in the chaos and was mildly menacing me, and then the cop car raced down the alley as the cops called me back and asked me to flag them down out the front of the house. Here now is a dramatic reenactment, with the old Italian drunk representing myself:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rnf4v5mqHes

slave2thewage
03-05-2012, 03:41 PM
Wasn't allowed to stand at the Rammstein gig in Manchester after queueing for 12 hours and they put me in a shitty seat at the back. Complaint letters ahoy.

aggroculture
03-05-2012, 04:49 PM
Were the screens on?

slave2thewage
03-05-2012, 05:01 PM
Rammstein gigs never have screens. I assume you're meant to amuse yourself with the occasional pyro burst. The only plus side was I was able to have their intro procession in my face and got a brief glance from Richard and Till. Not that much of a consolation after flying over from Ireland and the queueing.

fillow
03-23-2012, 07:09 AM
Just had my 79yo grandad hospitalized with a heart attack. Fuck being old.

Deus Ex Machina
03-23-2012, 05:43 PM
Wow, just can't shake the sense of dread I have about the future. Nothing specific, I just know that over the course of the nest 18 months, maybe more, maybe less, I'll learn once and for all, and in the clearest way possible, what kind of world I really live in. I'm about to undertake a pretty big project. I've tried before, but I knew it was my first shot at it, and knew that I wasn't really banging on all 12 cylinders . . . so I was prepared for failure. But now that I'm really proud of everything I've put together, and know my way around as well as I'm ever probably going to, I won't be able to chalk it up to circumstance or lack of experience. If it all goes south again, there'll be no hiding that the world sucks, or I failed, or both. Will I really be able to participate on something that resembles my terms, or will I just have to tread water til I bite it? Would be happy with the former, and scared as fuck about the latter.

YKWYA
03-24-2012, 04:36 AM
Will I really be able to participate on something that resembles my terms, or will I just have to tread water til I bite it? Would be happy with the former, and scared as fuck about the latter.

I can empathize with that. I have been thinking about it a lot lately too. I just really really hate the idea of settling.

But that's also where I try and think nowadays (and I know it is a bit of a cliche) just do what makes you happy. Dont measure it by 'success' or 'failure'. What does that mean anyway, if you are happy doing your best?

icklekitty
03-24-2012, 01:35 PM
My parents. Always around the corner with their drama to make sure I never get *too* happy.

I really can't handle this bullshit anymore.

YKWYA
03-25-2012, 03:17 PM
My parents. Always around the corner with their drama to make sure I never get *too* happy.

I really can't handle this bullshit anymore.


I can sure empathise with that, unfortunately.

Tossing and turning all night last night, because the night terrors have returned. I wake up screaming, and absolutely soaked because I've been sweating. Im tired and down all day. For fucks sake.

Kid Charlemagne
03-25-2012, 11:58 PM
Our family dog passed away this evening.

Ryan
03-26-2012, 03:31 AM
Wasn't allowed to stand at the Rammstein gig in Manchester after queueing for 12 hours.

Why the fuck not?

theruiner
03-26-2012, 04:44 AM
Our family dog passed away this evening.That's horrible. I'm really sorry to hear that, Josh. If you want to talk, you know where to find me.

icklekitty
03-27-2012, 04:57 PM
My parents. Always around the corner with their drama to make sure I never get *too* happy.

I really can't handle this bullshit anymore.

Apparently the drinking and abuse has started again, and now there's a studio flat in Kent involved. Welp, they wouldn't listen when I was a six year old with a packed suitcase, they ignored me when I started telling people, and they wouldn't listen to the police when she was almost killed, so I'm not getting involved anymore.

As far as I'm concerned, they are two humans I know and can be nice to for brief periods of time in exchange for money, meals out and household repairs. I had two parents growing up; a pensioner who is now dead and an Australian pop star I will be seeing on Tuesday. Lots of people have a dead parent and another they rarely see. I own my own flat, I have a successful freelance business, I have decent friends all over the world - some of whom know EVERYTHING about me and don't judge. I have a firm hold on the two long-term health conditions I was born with, and have been, seen, and done more than a lot of people my age. I've come further than many people my age, and honestly, been through less than some people my age.

To quote one of my doctors, it's just not my responsibility. Just like I told my Dad I didn't give a fuck about his cancer, so will I tell both of them that I've stopped giving a shit about this. I am free. The cycle ends here.


(But I'm going to keep coming in here to bitch about everything that's going to happen anyway, alright?)

Dra508
03-27-2012, 07:10 PM
Our family dog passed away this evening.So sorry for your loss Kid.

icklekitty - many people of told me that I'm taking too much responsibility too and that other people need to own their own behaviors. Just saying I now agree with that strategy, as hard it it might get resisting the natural urge to "own it".

Fixer808
03-27-2012, 07:11 PM
Our family dog passed away this evening.
Ah bummer man, sorry to hear that.

aurelius
03-28-2012, 03:05 AM
My grandma died tonight.

icklekitty
03-28-2012, 03:07 AM
My grandma died tonight.

:(

:::::all the hugs::::

Kid Charlemagne
03-29-2012, 12:07 PM
Thanks for all the kind words on my family dog. I appreciate it. But this week just got worse.

Today, the retail store that I work with have announced they're cutting 50 stores (although they plan on opening 50 stores in China this year..awesome), and our store being one of the least profitable ones, we've been told that we need to attend a mandatory meeting tonight to discuss the future of the employees. So naturally this has me worried and upset about what's going to happen. Two hours later, the company my mother works for called to tell her that they're separating her from the company and that her benefits will end at midnight. So no further notice, they just basically kicked her to the curb, even though they know damn well she's going for treatments four times a week and needs these benefits for those appointments. Seriously, fuck this. Fuck Best Buy and Fuck USAA.

Fixer808
03-29-2012, 03:11 PM
What the fuck, man?! Dear universe, can you please kick some good shit Kid's way?

YKWYA
03-29-2012, 03:36 PM
What the fuck, man?! Dear universe, can you please kick some good shit Kid's way?

Amen to that. All I can do is wish you all the best Kid, as I know many other people here will too. Hang in there.

Frozen Beach
04-26-2012, 02:53 PM
My sister broke up with her boyfriend. This hits me because he's a good friend. People wonder why I never leave my room. I'll tell you why: because I don't want to deal with shit like this. It's life, I guess.

the duder
05-02-2012, 06:10 PM
I really, really can't stand the fact that this university cannot fucking communicate between offices. I have been waiting for my student refund (to pay for rent, utilities, groceries, etc) since the semester began. This is the last week of classes. To top it off, I am switching banks and car insurance companies ASAP. First and foremost, the cocksuckers at PNC KNOW my balance as well as I. When a payment comes through that is greater than the amount there, rather than saying "nope, that much is not there", they PROCESS the payment and dock me with the charge. The charge in question is my car insurance payment, which is over $250 more than what I found I could get from another company. So in summary, after seeing that 1.) my money from the school HADN'T come through yet and that 2.) I couldn't afford my car insurance payment, 3.) I get ass raped by school, bank and car insurance company.

Fuck. This.


So, money still hasn't come through, therefore I do not have sufficient funds to pay taxes and register my car in PA. Decided to go to the bar last night to play trivia. Had 4 beers in 3 hours (hovering right around the legal limit) and drove home. Got pulled over for no registration on my vehicle. Was taken into custody and refused the breathalyzer, as I knew I was close to the limit and didn't want to get a (2nd :() DUI.

Completely perplexed about what to do right now. I hate this.

Elke
05-03-2012, 10:56 AM
Pretty goddamn fucked.

Just as I was trying to leave school, one of my students asked for me. So I went to see what she wanted, and she handed me an obituary of a friend of hers. I'd already spend half my lunch hour with another student, who has some issues herself, talking about this girl who commited suicide by train two days ago, so I wasn't unprepared.
But this girl is suicidal herself, and she's attempted to kill herself a couple of times in the past. And she wanted to talk to me.
But I'm suicidal. Which is not the best thing to be when you have to talk a girl off the proverbial ledge (it wasn't that serious, but she was considering it again, she said).

I ended up making myself way too vulnerable, and now I'm a bit of a mess, with one more day of classes to get through and then an evening of fun and games with the school's pastoral team. I just want to curl up in a ball and feel really really sorry for myself, right now.

Dra508
05-04-2012, 04:39 PM
So, money still hasn't come through, therefore I do not have sufficient funds to pay taxes and register my car in PA. Decided to go to the bar last night to play trivia. Had 4 beers in 3 hours (hovering right around the legal limit) and drove home. Got pulled over for no registration on my vehicle. Was taken into custody and refused the breathalyzer, as I knew I was close to the limit and didn't want to get a (2nd :() DUI.

Completely perplexed about what to do right now. I hate this.duder - you are getting pig piled. I'm sorry :(. Try not to feel too overwhelmed. This are all solvable problems.
And that what doesn't kills you makes you stronger blah blah blah pep talk. Hang in there bubba.


@Elke- you seem to be the approachable teacher over there. Can't you refer some of these kids to a school counselor rather than taking all of it on yourself. I mean really, you're there to teach, not be there psychiatrist.

Once again, I came to whine and got blown back by other people's real-life issues. I'll shut up now.

halloween
05-04-2012, 06:45 PM
Pretty goddamn fucked.

Just as I was trying to leave school, one of my students asked for me. So I went to see what she wanted, and she handed me an obituary of a friend of hers. I'd already spend half my lunch hour with another student, who has some issues herself, talking about this girl who commited suicide by train two days ago, so I wasn't unprepared.
But this girl is suicidal herself, and she's attempted to kill herself a couple of times in the past. And she wanted to talk to me.
But I'm suicidal. Which is not the best thing to be when you have to talk a girl off the proverbial ledge (it wasn't that serious, but she was considering it again, she said).

I ended up making myself way too vulnerable, and now I'm a bit of a mess, with one more day of classes to get through and then an evening of fun and games with the school's pastoral team. I just want to curl up in a ball and feel really really sorry for myself, right now.

Elke, you are one hell of a woman to be dealing with this while having your own "ledges" to avoid. I am suicidal and the moment I encounter someone like "me", I tend to avoid them because I just don't know how to handle that kind of thing anymore. The one exception right now being a girl who has clinged on to me so fast and strong that I can't do anything besides deal with her...and that's just about all I can handle.

I wish you all the strength!

the duder
05-04-2012, 09:21 PM
Thanks, Dra. Always appreciate your input :)
Just got in from my 2nd AA meeting. While I was sobering up in the cell, I pretty much came to the realization that I can't just have one. I mean, I have before. And I've had 0. Or just two. And everywhere in between. But, for the most part, this is the only decision I can make at the moment to commit to sobriety. 2 down in 2 days. 1 more to go...

Elke
05-05-2012, 01:44 AM
Thanks halloween. I've noticed that these things are usually very different for different people - or maybe I've just lived with it for so long that I've learned how to cope rather better than most, I don't know. I wish you all the strength you need.

Dra, she does see a school counsellor, but she was absent at the moment and I was there, so...

aggroculture
05-05-2012, 10:19 AM
Elke and Halloween, I hope the suicidal mindframe passes and develops into a more optimistic outlook on life.

halloween
05-06-2012, 05:47 PM
Thanks aggroculture! I mean, I've just recently gotten into a better mind frame- I'm 22 and my life is just now starting to even out on the ratio of happy vs depressed years- heh. I hope that I'll eventually be able to deal with other people's issues as you have been Elke, you really are someone to admire!

(edit.Thinking about that ratio thing- I became depressed at the age of 11, and recently i've been having a lot of those early childhood memories come back to me, and I'm starting to wonder if that's because that's the last time my brain associates being happy? mmm, random thought.)

Elke
05-07-2012, 01:21 AM
I've noticed that whenever things don't go well, it triggers the exact state of mind I had when I was around 14, which is probably (in hindsight) when my depression and all the subsequent problems started. The trick is to realize that this is almost like muscle memory (I even smell things I associate with that period of time, the memory is so strong), and then to realize that I am not that girl anymore and I haven't been for a long time. That's helped me a lot over the past year. I guess the best thing to have happened to me in recent years is actually standing in front of a red light and almost crossing the street - because it set a lot of things in motion, including a therapist who's more like something out of Dharma & Gregg than scientist but who worked through so much crap with me...
So I think, personally, it's the people around me who are to be admired, because they managed to help me get to this point :)

Frozen Beach
05-13-2012, 09:24 PM
You wanna hear something ridiculous? Well, I just spent last week staying at my Aunt and Uncles house because on Monday, my father tried to assault me... over spaghetti noodles. Well, technically he did assault me since he pushed me. I was going to report him and get a restraining order, but he's my father. I could not bring myself to do it. I'm back at home now. Honestly, if he freaks out over something like this again, I'm actually gonna defend myself. I'm tired of him pushing me around like I'm a kid on a playground. He's obviously much stronger than me, but I don't care.

nemesiswontdie
05-16-2012, 07:20 AM
This will sound dumb at first.

Me and my dad used to be big into wrestling. My dad looked exactly like The Undertaker. I grew up watching The Undertaker wrestle.
I forgot about wrestling till about a week ago and I decided to watch this years wrestlemania for The Undertaker.
I remembered that me and my dad used to watch it every year.
After the Undertaker match, they said it was an "end of an era" and that it was Undertakers last match.

I looked over to my left and said out loud "hey dad, did you know this was Undertakers last match?"

Then I remembered my dad passed away back in 2010.

It made me realize that I'm still not really 'over it'. I've just been sitting in my room these past few days thinking about it. I've been feeling very alone as of late and my mind has been getting the best of me and I've even had some friends telling me that I haven't really been myself these past few months.

I've kind of just lost the energy and will to do things and get on with my life since someone broke my heart awhile back. So now it just feels like I'm truly alone, no matter how many friends I'm surrounded by and I don't get joy out of doing anything productive at all.

Sorry if this is the wrong thread to put this in, it's pretty much ruined my day already, though it's only 7:20am.

Elke
05-16-2012, 10:12 AM
@ nemesiswontdie: I hate to be one of those 'everything that's good for me is good for you' people, but what you're describing sounds an awful lot like depression, and you should probably see someone. And yes, I've been hearing that for ten years and I didn't do it until it was almost too late, so I'm not one to talk. But in a couple of weeks that guy cracked me open like a nut and I discovered I had all this grief and guilt over the death of a brother I never even knew, so it's not too farfetched to think that your father's death still weighs on you.

Also, my day: I'm crashing and burning faster than an airstrike, and after having a panic attack in class yesterday, I started crying in the middle of the teacher's lounge for no apparent reason. I also discovered today that one of my students is pregnant, and another one was raped last week. Thankfully, I'm not on counselling duty for these girls, but they're 15 and I can't help but become extra depressed just thinking about it.
What I need is less empathy and self-pity, and more inner Anna Wintour.

orestes
05-19-2012, 11:16 AM
Sometimes I wonder if I truly love my mother.

mixxy
05-19-2012, 11:50 AM
Pretty goddamn fucked.

Just as I was trying to leave school, one of my students asked for me. So I went to see what she wanted, and she handed me an obituary of a friend of hers. I'd already spend half my lunch hour with another student, who has some issues herself, talking about this girl who commited suicide by train two days ago, so I wasn't unprepared.
But this girl is suicidal herself, and she's attempted to kill herself a couple of times in the past. And she wanted to talk to me.
But I'm suicidal. Which is not the best thing to be when you have to talk a girl off the proverbial ledge (it wasn't that serious, but she was considering it again, she said).

I ended up making myself way too vulnerable, and now I'm a bit of a mess, with one more day of classes to get through and then an evening of fun and games with the school's pastoral team. I just want to curl up in a ball and feel really really sorry for myself, right now.

Yeah, like others in this thread, I would say you definitely need to refer these types of conversations to the school counsellors. I'm a teacher, too and I know it sometimes feels like you're not doing your job unless you personally attend to everything. But you just can't be expected to do it all, all the time. In fact, in a situation like this one, I'd say it's safer for your professionalism to tell them you understand they need someone to talk to and then refer to their school counsellor to do just that. You definitely shouldn't be keeping the information that these girls give you to yourself. The way I see it is that we teachers should get this info from the counsellors on a need to know basis; therefore, I try to keep the confessions at bay and always assure students that there is someone in the school to talk to about their problems (just not me).

Dra508
05-19-2012, 11:53 AM
@ nemesiswontdie I completely agree with Elke. It's pretty classic symptoms. Easier said then done, but GTFO of your room. Being alone is the last thing you should be. Even if it's just to go walk around the block a couple of times. Make plans, even for little stuff. It's not so much to occupy your time and mind, but just to move. See you can go talk to a therapist, even if only once. You'd be surprised how easy it is and if only a couple of sessions it might right your ship.

Amaro
05-21-2012, 10:45 AM
This will sound dumb at first.

Me and my dad used to be big into wrestling. My dad looked exactly like The Undertaker. I grew up watching The Undertaker wrestle.
I forgot about wrestling till about a week ago and I decided to watch this years wrestlemania for The Undertaker.
I remembered that me and my dad used to watch it every year.
After the Undertaker match, they said it was an "end of an era" and that it was Undertakers last match.

I looked over to my left and said out loud "hey dad, did you know this was Undertakers last match?"

Then I remembered my dad passed away back in 2010.

It made me realize that I'm still not really 'over it'. I've just been sitting in my room these past few days thinking about it. I've been feeling very alone as of late and my mind has been getting the best of me and I've even had some friends telling me that I haven't really been myself these past few months.

I've kind of just lost the energy and will to do things and get on with my life since someone broke my heart awhile back. So now it just feels like I'm truly alone, no matter how many friends I'm surrounded by and I don't get joy out of doing anything productive at all.

Sorry if this is the wrong thread to put this in, it's pretty much ruined my day already, though it's only 7:20am.

I didn't mean to like your post. If I like it for anything it's that I can relate. I feel you. And so I don't know really what else to say. I wish we could hang out? That's it.

Moments like these, I can't help but feel bad for simply deleting you off of my PSN. (I hope you know it wasn't personal.)

I hope you're better than the day you wrote this.

nemesiswontdie
05-22-2012, 02:10 AM
@ nemesiswontdie I completely agree with Elke. It's pretty classic symptoms. Easier said then done, but GTFO of your room. Being alone is the last thing you should be. Even if it's just to go walk around the block a couple of times. Make plans, even for little stuff. It's not so much to occupy your time and mind, but just to move. See you can go talk to a therapist, even if only once. You'd be surprised how easy it is and if only a couple of sessions it might right your ship.


I've been hanging out with my friends a lot the past few days (pretty much why I haven't been as active on here the past few days except in the morning) so that I can keep myself active and everything out of my mind.

I've even been trying to get back into my workout schedule to just get things on track.

I want to talk to a therapist, but I know this is dumb to say but I'm not good at opening up to people. I am just not good with many people to begin with. I also don't have the money at the moment either. With my first speeding ticket I got the other day that will run me $115 on top of all the other bills I have to pay now because I got a shit job I got just recently. I usually just end up talking to friends and they just keep telling me the same shit over and over again. Either "get over it" or "just forget about it".

They just don't get it. It's not something you just fucking get over. That's not how it works.

With everything going on with not being really over my dads passing 2 years ago, feeling alone, I've felt more alone because the woman I that I really care about wants nothing to do with me. Basically telling me she wants nothing to do with me because apparently I'm crazy, stupid and I'm the most negative person she's ever met. So she wants nothing to do with me. Which doesn't make things any better with everything that's going on.


I didn't mean to like your post. If I like it for anything it's that I can relate. I feel you. And so I don't know really what else to say. I wish we could hang out? That's it.

Moments like these, I can't help but feel bad for simply deleting you off of my PSN. (I hope you know it wasn't personal.)

I hope you're better than the day you wrote this.

I think It's gotten worse actually. I don't really know any more. Everything is pretty much just a blur now.

Honestly, I didn't know you deleted me off PSN. I have not been really active on PSN the past few months. I usually just use Netflix on there now. I figure probably deleted me because I wasn't active. No hard feelings. I'm the same way. Anyone not active after a month usually gets deleted unless I really like them.

I know this is basically one big rant, but thanks for reading it.

allegro
05-22-2012, 10:11 AM
@nemesiswontdie - grief is a really powerful thing and it never truly leaves or goes away. You will always miss your dad, and sometimes it will hit you really hard and sometimes you figure out a way to learn to live with it and other times you need to accept what you're feeling and FEEL it and not shove it under a rug. What helps me when I'm grieving is to remember that my dad wouldn't want me to sit around grieving. If he was sitting right next to you, your dad would probably want you to try to find ways to enjoy your life to the best of your abilities because the biggest thing death teaches us is that life is pretty short, you know?

Also, this may sound dumb, but sitting in your room by yourself and talking to your dad about your grief or how you feel sometimes helps people a lot. He may not physically be there, but he's still there. And you don't have to "open up" to some stranger.

Pillfred
05-24-2012, 09:52 PM
nemesiswontdie- I've been in a similar spot myself luckily(?) i've had a realist perspective pounded into my head by my mother over the years so i can't get totally unhinged though i feel pretty close. That said its a tough spot to be in, I randomly cry most days, or at least feel like i might. Ive found mornings to be the worst cause all mental barriers are down. I for a while set an alarm just so i would go out before work and do something with my day. I also holed away a lot of the time. Kind of like Elke I've been told before to see a counselor and after seeing how it's helped my buddy i think it may not be a bad idea. i have found being honest with yourself is the best way to handle things, it's not easy but it may help maintain perspective, i try to open about things without being a burden. It's weird really to read what you wrote as it echoes a lot of what i was thinking lately only it was a good friend instead of my dad that died a couple years ago, etc. The good thing about being in pieces is that you get to put yourself back together, hopefully better.

As for my day, got popped for a DUI last night, nothing bad happened just being dumb. All things considered it went smooth enough, it's just that now i have a 700$ in fines and shit to pay off in the next six months on top of catching up hospital bills, school bills etc....

halloween
05-29-2012, 01:12 AM
I don't know where to put this, so i'm just going to do a mini rant in here. it's the accumulation of several small things plus the big shadow that is the past.

1. I'm on my period, so i'm already feeling very vulnerable. I've been off birth control so my mood swings are very...scary to say the least (the word suicidal comes to mind...) 2. I've been around family all week, so that means two things, a) I've been rehashing a lot of things, the main one being how insecure and self conscious i am around these people who keep eyeing my scars. and b) I haven't been smoking marijuana in two weeks so that means my insomnia is back in full swing, so that leads me to 3. Insomnia and obsessive compulsive thoughts, making tonight an onslaught of negative thoughts, where i end up sitting in the bathroom feeling like a helpless 5 year old crying and saying "i'll be ok, i'll be ok, i'll be ok", taking deep breaths in the effort to calm myself down, but every time i manage to do that, i'll relax a little but then instantly my body tenses up and convulses back into sobs. (which is the cycle i've been going through in writing this).

I don't know what to do, i guess i'm just waiting until i tire myself out. I haven't let myself panic, because crying is a good release. I feel too weak to go into a full out breathing exercise, mindful state where I can dissociate myself from all of this and let the message of "i'll be ok" sink in. I feel so goddamn alone and tired.

Lunatica
05-29-2012, 06:45 AM
Take some B-12. It helps me shut my head up a little bit.

Elke
05-29-2012, 10:00 AM
I've been rehashing a lot of things, the main one being how insecure and self conscious i am around these people who keep eyeing my scars

I'm not going to pretend I know how you feel, or how you could stop feeling it, but this struck me: why rehash it? You are around people who can make you feel that way, and have done so in the past. Nothing makes it so that they also have to be able to do it now. You're not the same person you were ten, five, two years ago. You're not even the same person you were a couple of months ago: you've grown, you've learned, you've had good experiences and setbacks, you've had people who don't make you feel like that... Allow yourself to be you, right now.
Which, I know, is a lot easier said than done. But because I know that, I also know how important it is so...

halloween
05-29-2012, 08:48 PM
I'm not going to pretend I know how you feel, or how you could stop feeling it, but this struck me: why rehash it? You are around people who can make you feel that way, and have done so in the past. Nothing makes it so that they also have to be able to do it now. You're not the same person you were ten, five, two years ago. You're not even the same person you were a couple of months ago: you've grown, you've learned, you've had good experiences and setbacks, you've had people who don't make you feel like that... Allow yourself to be you, right now.
Which, I know, is a lot easier said than done. But because I know that, I also know how important it is so...

Well, it's a bit odd to explain, i was just comparing my life-which was split up between two countries, with this part of my family (my half-brother's family) which is also bicultural...except the marriage lasted, and they live in a happy suburban house. Not that i'm jealous, but seeing the mother there with her children, speaking spanish and it just reminded me how much i miss my own mother in brasil, and last night i just rehashed all those angry feelings i had and that together with the eyeing, it just makes me feel defensive.
I've been so emotional lately, today in the car i have bit of a meltdown, from a long tiring day of museums in 90 degree weather, it was a good moment where i let myself cry without "causing a scene" and my family let me have my moment.

Elke
05-29-2012, 11:57 PM
Crying, when done in measured quantities and for no explicit reason, is awesome. :)

sentient02970
06-01-2012, 09:42 AM
Spaced on my propane bill and tank level. Ran out last night and can't pay for delivery for 2 more weeks. Looking forward to many cold showers. Not happy.

Dra508
06-01-2012, 05:28 PM
Spaced on my propane bill and tank level. Ran out last night and can't pay for delivery for 2 more weeks. Looking forward to many cold showers. Not happy.On the plus side, be thankful you didn't space in February.

Amaro
06-04-2012, 12:02 AM
I've been hanging out with my friends a lot the past few days (pretty much why I haven't been as active on here the past few days except in the morning) so that I can keep myself active and everything out of my mind. I usually just end up talking to friends and they just keep telling me the same shit over and over again. Either "get over it" or "just forget about it".

They just don't get it. It's not something you just fucking get over. That's not how it works.

With everything going on with not being really over my dads passing 2 years ago, feeling alone, I've felt more alone because the woman I that I really care about wants nothing to do with me. Basically telling me she wants nothing to do with me because apparently I'm crazy, stupid and I'm the most negative person she's ever met. So she wants nothing to do with me. Which doesn't make things any better with everything that's going on.

I think It's gotten worse actually. I don't really know any more. Everything is pretty much just a blur now.

Hanging out is good...it's great...only not when friends say what you say they said. I find that unacceptable.

I don't feel confident at all with starting out fresh advice on this subject, but I agree with everything in allegro's last post to you...just to thumbs-up that again.

My dad passed away only last September, and I've taken some pretty "weird" turns since...like what life outlooks I've taken on. (Not necessarily all positive ones, per se.) I slip in and out of grief at least a few times a week, yet...it's almost always been surrounded by or ends with a comforted feeling over the life he gave me (in every sense), and the person he showed me to be more like. I can get so deeply UPSET at the fact I will never again have another carefree moment with him, like I'd had so many of throughout my life... Those absolutely highlight the relationship we had together. But I'm so thankful to have been his son, and see his joy as a dad. He told me not long before we even knew he was sick that having a family was his dream. It warms my heart and kills me, in the best way, to type that out...he was able to live his dream. He was one of the greats, but he still lives in me...til' the day I too am gone. Nobody can take him away from within.

hellospaceboy
06-05-2012, 11:29 PM
I was mowing my lawn yesterday, and something bit my leg. I assume it was a spider (they live in the back yard by the compost bin, and the bite mark looks like the ones I found online), and now my entire calf is inflamed and red and hurts like a sonofabitch. My wife (who is a student-nurse) checked it and we're keeping a close eye on it, in case it spreads and turns out to be some nasty venomous bastard. I hate Florida wildlife :(

nemesiswontdie
06-06-2012, 02:19 AM
I was mowing my lawn yesterday, and something bit my leg. I assume it was a spider (they live in the back yard by the compost bin, and the bite mark looks like the ones I found online), and now my entire calf is inflamed and red and hurts like a sonofabitch. My wife (who is a student-nurse) checked it and we're keeping a close eye on it, in case it spreads and turns out to be some nasty venomous bastard. I hate Florida wildlife :(

That sucks man. Spider bites hurt like a bitch. I've been bitten a few times actually.

Just do what I do though and look at the bright side: You could be the next Spider-Man.


Hanging out is good...it's great...only not when friends say what you say they said. I find that unacceptable.

I don't feel confident at all with starting out fresh advice on this subject, but I agree with everything in allegro's last post to you...just to thumbs-up that again.

My dad passed away only last September, and I've taken some pretty "weird" turns since...like what life outlooks I've taken on. (Not necessarily all positive ones, per se.) I slip in and out of grief at least a few times a week, yet...it's almost always been surrounded by or ends with a comforted feeling over the life he gave me (in every sense), and the person he showed me to be more like. I can get so deeply UPSET at the fact I will never again have another carefree moment with him, like I'd had so many of throughout my life... Those absolutely highlight the relationship we had together. But I'm so thankful to have been his son, and see his joy as a dad. He told me not long before we even knew he was sick that having a family was his dream. It warms my heart and kills me, in the best way, to type that out...he was able to live his dream. He was one of the greats, but he still lives in me...til' the day I too am gone. Nobody can take him away from within.

Sorry dude. I didn't know he passed away. I thought he was in treatments by what you said on PSN awhile ago.

I know he's still here and he's possibly watching me. It just kills me inside to know that I will never sit next to him in the front room and watch Becker or Scrubs and eat chinese food like we did. It hurts to know that I can't have another funny but serious conversation with him. I lost my best friend.

I haven't said 'I love you' since he passed away. Not because I don't mean it, but because he was the last one I said it to and nothing will ever top that one.

I would do anything to change places with him. Any time, any day.

miss k bee
06-06-2012, 05:42 PM
Changed my job at work after I came back from holiday from a night shift job 10pm to 6am (7 on 7off) to a early shift job 7am to 3pm (usual monday to friday) at work from an internal vacancy only to find myself now with the manager from hell who picks over every little thing and has virtually threatened me with the sack even though I have only been in the position for 2 weeks - but been working at the company for a year and a half. From leaving a position where I felt fairly secure I am now in one where I feel so insecure and stressed that I broke down twice in ten day!. Wish I never left the night shift :(

littlemonkey613
06-08-2012, 12:17 AM
One of my friends is dying of cancer. We are only 20 :(. I met him after his diagnosis and I didn't expect to get so close to him so fast but he took me to Coachella and the past few months we've really gotten close. Today his mother (whom is also very sick and dying slowly of MS) sent me a message on facebook asking for my address because apparantly he has written a letter to me in case anything happens to him soon. She said that our friendship has really meant a lot to him. I'm so scared for him and also because my best friend in the whole world is his girlfriend and I'm scared that she will never be the same after this. She is strong and amazing but the idea of her suffering after his death is almost as horrible as the thought of him dying. I've been hanging out with them a whole lot recently and we have sleepovers at his apartment (the 3 of us in one bed like 3 pigs in a blanket haha) I cherish these moments and I don't think I'm ready to let go.

Big Fat Matt
06-08-2012, 12:24 AM
i, for lack of a better term, re-exploded my knee at work, moving boxes of gallon jugs of antifreeze. the clinic gave me vikes, but i dont touch that shit anymore. because my job is TECHNICALLY a deskjob, i didnt get a note, just vikes and a knee brace, that i already have three of. Now im on that whole "if i didnt blow my knee up, i would be playing for [insert big 10 school here]" and its JAWSOME. rabble rabble bitch moan.


also, i feel like a dick having read littlemonkey613's problems. i should man the fuck up.....

Elke
06-08-2012, 11:15 AM
littlemonkey, my thoughts are with you. That's some heavy shit to work through.

My little sad of the day is really no sad at all, compared to that: I had my last class with a group of students I've had with me for four years, and who are the most adorable and sweet and generous and fantastic girls in the world. I've literally watched them grow from kids to adults, and to send them off into the world now is... both amazing and incredibly difficult. I cried at the end of our last class together, but thankfully, so did they.
I'm going to be a mess at the graduation ceremony.

Frozen Beach
06-08-2012, 06:34 PM
People have been ignoring me a lot recently, and if that didn't make me feel bad enough, I just found out my Grandma has been rushed to the hospital because of chest pains. I honestly fucking hate my life.

miss k bee
06-08-2012, 07:13 PM
Sorry to hear what littlemonkey and Frozen Beach are going through.

I resigned from my job today, a job that makes me break down twice in a week is no good for my mental health. So yes transfered my ass out of a job, sometimes the grass is not greener on the other side.

aggroculture
06-08-2012, 07:13 PM
Seems like I have another hernia. A little over two years after surgery for the other one.

Elke
06-09-2012, 01:50 AM
Good for you, miss k bee. I know how difficult that kind of decision is to make, but you have to choose your own sanity and health first.

theruiner
06-09-2012, 02:47 AM
I resigned from my job today, a job that makes me break down twice in a week is no good for my mental health. I've been there, more than once. It sucks. Good on 'ya for getting out of there.

littlemonkey, I am so sorry to hear that. I can't imagine how hard that must be. If you ever want to talk/vent, shoot me a PM.

Frozen Beach, I've got my fingers crossed for your grandmother. Keep us updated, yeah?

sublimaze
06-09-2012, 11:23 PM
My Dad-in-law has pancreatic cancer. Of course, according to the surgeons, they "got it all," but it's still not a good prognosis, even very early on. My own dad died 3 years ago. I just would like my son to grow up with a Grandpa. I love him so much, this breaks my heart. My husband doesn't seem to understand yet, but he'll be devastated once he does.

Dra508
06-11-2012, 05:47 AM
My Dad-in-law has pancreatic cancer. Of course, according to the surgeons, they "got it all," but it's still not a good prognosis, even very early on. My own dad died 3 years ago. I just would like my son to grow up with a Grandpa. I love him so much, this breaks my heart. My husband doesn't seem to understand yet, but he'll be devastated once he does.My father in law died of this about 5 years ago. It wasn't anything operable and he decided to stop treatment a year in. He was good for a couple of years and checked a ton of stuff off his bucket list, but then went down hill very quickly. It was an experience that really showed me how insidious and evil cancer is.... I'm sorry.

allegro
06-11-2012, 06:09 AM
My father in law died of this about 5 years ago. It wasn't anything operable and he decided to stop treatment a year in. He was good for a couple of years and checked a ton of stuff off his bucket list, but then went down hill very quickly. It was an experience that really showed me how insidious and evil cancer is.... I'm sorry.
my grandfather died of pancreatic cancer. he was given 3 months, but received chemo and lived for 5 months. 5 horrible, sick, painful months. he was 68.

I hope that your father-in-law doesn't have to go through that suffering, Sublimaze,

sublimaze
06-18-2012, 12:07 AM
my grandfather died of pancreatic cancer. he was given 3 months, but received chemo and lived for 5 months. 5 horrible, sick, painful months. he was 68.

I hope that your father-in-law doesn't have to go through that suffering, Sublimaze,

Me too. He sees the oncologist on Tuesday. We'll know more then.

Piko
06-18-2012, 08:16 AM
Lost a friend yesterday. He's a huge basketball fan. So he invites a bunch of people (me included). I opted out because it was a weeknight and a had work in the morning, a few did. He has a fit about people only liking football and no other sports. He goes on and on until he says "it's provably because of all the black people playing". That pissed me and a couple others off, obviously. I opted to the sarcastic approach with "oh, you caught me! I'm a racist! You and your insane psychic abilities".

That made things worse and the him playing the race card because no one wanted to go to a bar, on a Thursday night, to watch basketball (I watched it at home). He kept whining and rambling on (he's in his early 30s and older than me), so I eventually left the conversation (Facebook) .

Next few days I hear that convo is still going and all he's done was trash talk me, for THREE DAYS.

So, I finally message him and give him the generic "hear you've got a problem with me. Why not come at me directly?". He continues to call me a racist. Mind you, my entire family are very Jewish, and very liberal. So after a bit, a few fuck yous were thrown, and that was that.

Friends for the past 2 or so years, over, because I decided to stay in and watch the game from home. None of this would've happened if I had gone, I bet.

I left him with "oh BTW, why did you stop going to karma again? Oh yeah! The blacks!". It's a nightclub that became very more rap friendly with a strong demographic. All of my friends stopped going. He said "diversity", I called "hypocrisy". More fuck yous were given and that's that.

A little bummed to lose a friend on these circumstances, but that's how it has to be I guess...

Dra508
06-18-2012, 04:15 PM
Is the x friend black?

theruiner
06-18-2012, 04:38 PM
Piko, this guy sounds like a psycho. I know it sucks to lose a friend, but you're probably better off not having him in your life.

Piko
06-18-2012, 06:30 PM
He's Asian. I'm pretty whatever about it at this point. And he's gotten into it and lost friends over fantasy football, so I guess I'm not surprised. My only problem now is thar we're in a group of friends (he's pissed off a few of them as well). So it's going to be weird when it comes to group functions. But I'm done with it. He's in his 30s and having a fit like that? No thanks. I'm far better off without. Just aggravating that someone can ruin a day because of a basketball game. That's true ignorance right there.

Dra508
06-20-2012, 07:17 PM
My sister in law posted on Facebook that her dad died. My soon to be X won't take my call, keeps kicking me to voicemail. :(

somewhat_damaged
06-23-2012, 08:09 AM
I'm having possibly the worst month of my life; my dad has been in and out of hospital; I found out one of my best mates is moving 6 hours away for 18 months due to military training the day before my birthday, meaning I can't spend any time with my two closest friends anymore (the other one now lives ion the other side of the country); I got laid off from my second job which I needed because of the cash; and to cap it off today I had to walk out of the thing I normally enjoy more than anything else in life, playing soccer, which I've done for 16 years non stop, because some of my 'team-mates' decided to abuse me on the field in the middle of a game and have generally made playing less than enjoyable over the past few weeks :(
And as an added bonus I also picked up a parking fine this afternoon. yay.

slave2thewage
06-25-2012, 03:28 PM
Broke my leg in two places. Was meant to be flying to England to see Combichrist today. Fuck everything.

Dra508
06-26-2012, 04:56 PM
Broke my leg in two places. Was meant to be flying to England to see Combichrist today. Fuck everything.That's awful. So, sorry. Did someone push you into traffic?

slave2thewage
06-27-2012, 11:35 AM
Brought down by a door frame. A DOOR FRAME. People will not sing of that, ffs.

Magtig
07-04-2012, 02:16 PM
Yesterday I found out that my ex-best friend of 10 years, who sent me death threats and went completely stalker psycho on me for an entire half year after I stopped talking to him, contacted my sister last Friday asking for my number. He said, "I miss my best friend." It's been five years since I've talked to this guy, and I have no inclination whatsoever to resurrect an incredibly damaging friendship. The person that was his friend was an insecure alcoholic with no social life who relied on his friend for 95% of his emotional support; that person no longer exists (thank fuck).

It's making me paranoid, and I fucking hate it. Fucking move on already!

Fixer808
07-04-2012, 03:49 PM
Jesus, that's got bad news written all over it.

orestes
07-04-2012, 03:56 PM
Broke my leg in two places. Was meant to be flying to England to see Combichrist today. Fuck everything.

Well, if it's any consolation, an acquaintance of mine broke both​ her legs while dancing in her living room, slightly drunk.

Fixer808
07-04-2012, 04:04 PM
THAT'S impressive!

Fixer808
07-06-2012, 05:11 PM
My parents have to have their barely 5 year old chocolate lab put down later today. She's lost 15lbs in a week, her liver has failed and toxins are building in her body and brain, so she's having slight seizures. And in typical heartbreaking dog fashion she's still gamely wagging her tail and eating bits of cookie from my grandpa's hand.
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z246/Fixer808/270365_10150658626320112_1657408_n.jpg
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z246/Fixer808/227239_10150602600765112_679337_n.jpg
Also, that was MY gorilla when I was a kid! She found it one day and it turned into her favourite.

Dra508
07-07-2012, 09:57 PM
Awww, she looks precious. So sorry for your loss.


/walks away - I was just going whine about my so-called life..

Jacob's Ladder
07-08-2012, 06:52 AM
Sorry to just pop in to vent, but considering I'm up at 7:00 am and completely sober and my social circle is a mess I just NEED to vent.

Friends relationship drama may lead to someone (who I don't know well, but I don't think is a bad person) losing her job because she's in a fucking relationship triangle. I'm going to have to have a serious talk with a friend tomorrow that may ruin several of my friendships. There is a huge schism in my social circle coming. Also, I was having a great heart to heart with a girl I really like just before shit blew up. Jesus, what a mess.

There's also a mouse in my apartment.

Fixer808
07-08-2012, 04:51 PM
Awww, she looks precious. So sorry for your loss.


/walks away - I was just going whine about my so-called life..
Thanks, she was a sweetie. What makes it even worse is that my parents got her soon (probably TOO soon) after having their PREVIOUS dog put down at 10yrs old, due to cancer and a broken leg. Ugh...

Also, whine away, that's what the thread is for! Never know, someone might have an answer ;)

orestes
07-08-2012, 04:57 PM
My parents have to have their barely 5 year old chocolate lab put down later today. She's lost 15lbs in a week, her liver has failed and toxins are building in her body and brain, so she's having slight seizures. And in typical heartbreaking dog fashion she's still gamely wagging her tail and eating bits of cookie from my grandpa's hand.
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z246/Fixer808/270365_10150658626320112_1657408_n.jpg
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z246/Fixer808/227239_10150602600765112_679337_n.jpg
Also, that was MY gorilla when I was a kid! She found it one day and it turned into her favourite.

It always breaks my heart when people have to put their pets down. So sorry for you, Chris. :(

Fixer808
07-08-2012, 04:59 PM
Thanks <3
I'm bummed but I'm more concerned about my mom, she's pretty wrecked about it.

Shnoorum
07-08-2012, 06:45 PM
My parents have to have their barely 5 year old chocolate lab put down later today. She's lost 15lbs in a week, her liver has failed and toxins are building in her body and brain, so she's having slight seizures. And in typical heartbreaking dog fashion she's still gamely wagging her tail and eating bits of cookie from my grandpa's hand.
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z246/Fixer808/270365_10150658626320112_1657408_n.jpg
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z246/Fixer808/227239_10150602600765112_679337_n.jpg
Also, that was MY gorilla when I was a kid! She found it one day and it turned into her favourite.

Shit that is just heartbreaking to read. I know what its like to lose a pet, I know it's an extremely cliched thing to say but they really do become a part of the family. My sympathy to you and your family dude

Shnoorum
07-08-2012, 06:59 PM
Sorry to just pop in to vent, but considering I'm up at 7:00 am and completely sober and my social circle is a mess I just NEED to vent.

Friends relationship drama may lead to someone (who I don't know well, but I don't think is a bad person) losing her job because she's in a fucking relationship triangle. I'm going to have to have a serious talk with a friend tomorrow that may ruin several of my friendships. There is a huge schism in my social circle coming. Also, I was having a great heart to heart with a girl I really like just before shit blew up. Jesus, what a mess.

There's also a mouse in my apartment.

Ah I just got out of a giant social mess semi recently so I know the feeling. I pretty much lost all of my friends due to all the crap that went on. To be honest, I didn't care that I lost anyone I was just glad to get out of that shit storm. Besides that, none of them gave much of a crap about me to begin with so it's all good. So yeah, what happens happens, life goes on.

That mouse could be a blessing in disguise. I moved to Edinburgh recently and the apartment we live in now had mice. One of them was the most awesomely badass little mouse that ever mouse'd. I liked him so much I named him Smudgeon. However, it sucked really bad one day when I was watching TV and he crawled out from under the desk pretty much dead. Some asshole in the block I live in must have poisoned him. Had to bury the little guy and everything. If your mouse is even a fraction as awesome as Smudgeon, you are one lucky SOB

REPLICA
07-10-2012, 02:45 PM
Just found out a friend of mine here at the hotel was robbed while she worked the front desk last night. So now we have to go through all kinds of new procedures dealing with our money. From what I heard, the guy who robbed her had a gun on him but there wasn't any violence.

Kid Charlemagne
07-11-2012, 10:53 PM
http://www.ksat.com/news/Man-shot-to-death-on-southeast-side/-/478452/15485896/-/qbjo7k/-/index.html

My mother's cousin (he was more of an uncle to me than most of my uncles) was gunned down this afternoon. He was always such a nice guy who just made poor decisions sometimes, but he was there when my grandmother died a few years back and even visited my mom in the hospital when she had a stroke two years ago and called her to periodically check up on her. I'm in shock.

theruiner
07-11-2012, 11:01 PM
That's horrible! I'm so sorry for your loss, Josh.

Dra508
07-12-2012, 05:35 PM
That's horrible! I'm so sorry for your loss, Josh.I'm so sorry kid.

Kid Charlemagne
07-12-2012, 05:39 PM
Thank you both. On top of that, my car wouldn't start today and I had to get my ignition fixed. So the past 24 hours in the KC household has been under the guise of "REALLY?!?!?". Thank fuck I have the whole weekend off or else I'd lose it. Not looking forward to another funeral this year.

Fixer808
07-12-2012, 05:49 PM
Ah dude, I'm sorry. Relax the shit out of this weekend.

redshoewearer
07-13-2012, 09:22 PM
http://www.ksat.com/news/Man-shot-to-death-on-southeast-side/-/478452/15485896/-/qbjo7k/-/index.html

My mother's cousin (he was more of an uncle to me than most of my uncles) was gunned down this afternoon. He was always such a nice guy who just made poor decisions sometimes, but he was there when my grandmother died a few years back and even visited my mom in the hospital when she had a stroke two years ago and called her to periodically check up on her. I'm in shock.

Really, really sorry to hear it.

sublimaze
07-17-2012, 12:36 AM
I most likely have breast cancer. Not 100% sure yet, because I have to go to a breast cancer specialist for evaluation and biopsy/surgery/chemo/radiation/etc., but I have this itchy sore on my nipple and my OB-GYN agrees it doesn't look good.

What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.

theruiner
07-17-2012, 01:18 AM
^^Fuck! :(

Jinsai
07-17-2012, 01:34 AM
I most likely have breast cancer. Not 100% sure yet, because I have to go to a breast cancer specialist for evaluation and biopsy/surgery/chemo/radiation/etc., but I have this itchy sore on my nipple and my OB-GYN agrees it doesn't look good.

What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.

It's amazing that you're considering your child first, you're obviously a great parent. Just try not to drive yourself insane with worry until you've had it conclusively tested.

icklekitty
07-17-2012, 03:12 AM
What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.

Don't think like this unless you know you have it, let alone whether you're going to die from it. Right now what you're going to do is go to your appointment and get scanned.

sick among the pure
07-17-2012, 03:15 AM
Just got a phone call from my fiance at work. He got a text from his little sister's boyfriend that his asshole brother got drunk and beat the shit out of her and his mom (sister is taking mom to ER, as well as herself). This fucking prick, he did unspeakable shit to my fiance all his life, but he made me behave around him because "he's still [his] brother" but after hearing the pain in his voice while he told me what happened, idk if I can keep from doing something stupid next time we drive up home to visit our families.
He recently divorced his ex wife of less than a year because she was beating him, oh the irony, and his mom moved in because she's on hard times. Since the divorce was because of his ex beating him, he got full custody of their toddler. Can he now lose the kid to CPS?

sick among the pure
07-17-2012, 03:18 AM
I most likely have breast cancer. Not 100% sure yet, because I have to go to a breast cancer specialist for evaluation and biopsy/surgery/chemo/radiation/etc., but I have this itchy sore on my nipple and my OB-GYN agrees it doesn't look good.

What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.

My mom had breast cancer when I was a senior in high school. Even if that is what your sore is, modern medicine can work wonders, and more than likely you'll be ok after surgery and therapy. Breast cancer isn't a death sentence anymore, you'll be able to get through it.

Elke
07-17-2012, 03:36 AM
Not 100% sure yet,...

Don't get me wrong, it's okay to worry and panic and get scared, but try to tackle this one step at a time. There's so many possibilities between a dodgy sore and something that will actually kill you, and like sick amongst the pure said, there's so much that can be done these days. I hope you have some support at home, love. You're in my prayers.

witte
07-17-2012, 04:18 AM
Yesterday, Jon Lord (71) passed away.
Deep Purple was my first love and I grew up with his music and he was a gentleman.
I realize that this means the end of an era to me and I realize that I'm getting old too...

Amaro
07-17-2012, 06:46 AM
I most likely have breast cancer. Not 100% sure yet, because I have to go to a breast cancer specialist for evaluation and biopsy/surgery/chemo/radiation/etc., but I have this itchy sore on my nipple and my OB-GYN agrees it doesn't look good.

What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.

First, I do hope it isn't so... I know already this must be life-altering... If it is cancer, however, I hope it's not anything but stage 1. My former neighbor was diagnosed with breast cancer two years ago, and, while I unfortunately can't say of all the circumstances or details, I know she's just fine right now.

Secondly and lastly, I just have to say, if it is, please take all the time necessary to look at your alternative options just as well... (Maybe you know already.) There are countless cases of all different severities where survivors felt absolute in that they beat theirs through holistic approaches, some mixing with modern treatment and some nixing modern treatment altogether from the start. I know/hear of people who think it's all a crock (ironic when there are people vehemently against modern treatment with legitimate reason), but I'm mostly talking about diet. Nothing comes of more importance. If a cancer is caught early on, and you make big changes, I do believe it can make a big difference.

I'm not sure what your view on that all is, but I would feel wrong not expressing.

Dra508
07-17-2012, 06:58 AM
I most likely have breast cancer. Not 100% sure yet, because I have to go to a breast cancer specialist for evaluation and biopsy/surgery/chemo/radiation/etc., but I have this itchy sore on my nipple and my OB-GYN agrees it doesn't look good.

What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.:( Thinking of you. Get the test, make sure, then find out all your options.

marodi
07-17-2012, 08:57 AM
I most likely have breast cancer. Not 100% sure yet, because I have to go to a breast cancer specialist for evaluation and biopsy/surgery/chemo/radiation/etc., but I have this itchy sore on my nipple and my OB-GYN agrees it doesn't look good.

What am I going to do? My little guy's not even in preschool.

Oh hun! *tons of comforting hugs*

Like many others have said, right now what's important is that you get a proper diagnosis and a list of available treatments. Consider all you options before you make any decisions. I know it's hard but try not to worry too much before knowing for sure; worrying will eat up your energy and you'll need that energy to fight whatever it is that's wrong with you and for your precious little guy. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. *love you lots and lots*

Fixer: I'm so very sorry about your parents dog. Losing a pet is heartbreaking. *hugs for them too*

Kid: My deepest condolences for your loss. It's a terrible tragedy; nobody deserves to die like that. I'll keep all of your family in my thoughts and prayers too. *comforting hugs all around*

As for my fucked up day (although it now seems like a trifle considering): Loki the cat (of which you can see a pic in the Pictures of your pets thread) like the good Trickster god after which he was named pulled the ultimate joke on us on the night from Sunday to Monday: he died. He seemed fine up until late Sunday afternoon when he became very lethargic after throwing up. We were in the middle of a heat wave so we thought that the heat was to blame; I went to my brother's place to see him and I told my bro to try and keep him cool by passing a wet washcloth over him from time to time (no iced water though) and to try get him to drink a bit of water. We were going to go to the vet first thing yesterday morning but Loki died a bit after midnight. Both my brother and my mom were not able to take care of his body (for all sorts of reasons) so I was the one who had to pick him up yesterday morning and who brought him to the vet to be cremated. The vet told me that he most likely died of urinary track infection and that my brother wasn't able to pick up on on any change in his behavior because he didn't have him long enough to know him well and that sick cats are notorious to hide that they are sick because it's a sign of weakness. I cried all of yesterday because had we known Loki was sick, we would have him treated immediately (I would even have paid for it even if I had to starve to do so) and because my 7 year old nephew (who is with his mother right now; my bro and her are no longer together and my brother gets his kids every two weeks) will be devastated when he'll learn of this; Loki was his birthday gift.

Fixer808
07-17-2012, 04:46 PM
Aww, that sucks. That happened to a former roommate, she got up in the morning and out of the blue her cat suddenly crashed and had to be taken to the vet, died in the cab on the way.

Sublimaze, , like people are saying, diagnosis first! If it does turn out to be cancer, you've got a pre-set support group right here, but until then let's hope it's something trivial.

Elke
07-17-2012, 05:30 PM
Aw marodi, that's really sad.

sublimaze
07-17-2012, 06:54 PM
Thanks, you guys, for all of your thoughts. I'm trying to be a "glass half full" kind of person, which is hit-or-miss right now.

Fixer/Kid/Marodi, I'm so sorry for your losses. I hope all of you feel better soon.

Frozen Beach
07-17-2012, 10:09 PM
Depression has suddenly hit me out of the blue, and I'm having really bad, constant suicidal thoughts. I have no one to talk to, my friends are busy or just think I'm being a crybaby. I hope I can fall to sleep.

orestes
07-17-2012, 10:17 PM
Call a suicide hotline to speak to anyone​.

theruiner
07-17-2012, 11:47 PM
^This x1000

Elke
07-18-2012, 09:52 AM
I third that. Talk to someone - pretty much anyone. A suicide hotline is a good option, or your GP if that's someone you feel comfortable with. Or rant here.

Frozen Beach
07-18-2012, 03:23 PM
I'm ok now, though I appreciate the concern. I'm seeing a psychiatrist soon, so hopefully things will be better for me. It's weird, one second I can feel very confident, but the next second it's like someone destroyed all of it.

scotty79
07-19-2012, 03:05 AM
Depression has suddenly hit me out of the blue, and I'm having really bad, constant suicidal thoughts. I have no one to talk to, my friends are busy or just think I'm being a crybaby. I hope I can fall to sleep.

I have felt the same the past few days, mainly yesterday I had this voice in my head telling me to go do somethin but was able to tell myself to stop being silly and just get on with my work then when I was at the gym later on the voice came back tellin me just to go home and do it, I had to walk out the gym because i knew i was gonna start cryin and as soon as i got to my car i did, i txt my girlfriend to see if she was at home, not because i was gonna do anythin just so that someone was there to talk to and it did help so i do hope you find someone to talk to as it really helped me and I'm anyone else can tell you it's helped them

theruiner
07-19-2012, 03:33 AM
Dude, I don't mean this in any sort of insulting or hostile way, but seriously, if you're hearing voices in your head telling you to do things, you need to see a professional. As soon as possible.

Elke
07-19-2012, 05:07 AM
^ Yes. That. Auditory hallucinations, while common, are usually a sign of something pretty much very not good. Seriously: go see a doctor.

scotty79
07-19-2012, 06:41 AM
maybe I worded that wrong but it wasn't so much 'voices' more of me just sayin to myself go do it, even though i know i was being totally stupid in saying it, today is a totally new day for me in that sense that I'm not thinking like that at all and am pretty pissed off with myself for even feeling like that especially when it came from nowhere

Conan The Barbarian
07-19-2012, 09:22 PM
Phone dropped out of my pocket, screen is completely cracked. Still works, but still a fucking bummer. I foresee my thumb getting cut.

Dra508
07-20-2012, 08:21 AM
maybe I worded that wrong but it wasn't so much 'voices' more of me just sayin to myself go do it, even though i know i was being totally stupid in saying it, today is a totally new day for me in that sense that I'm not thinking like that at all and am pretty pissed off with myself for even feeling like that especially when it came from nowhereThere is no shame in talking to someone and I tell you, it's quite amazing how quickly you can get perspective.

Piko
07-20-2012, 08:48 AM
Dropped my phone in a toilet, fried it. Just had to buy a new one. Broke until next Friday...

carpenoctem
07-20-2012, 02:05 PM
Went to a funeral today. It was my best friend's old middle school buddy, the kind of friend we all used to have, you know the one whose house you always went to on the weekends and their dad cooked for you and stuff. They hadn't talked in years but it was still a shock when she found out. I didn't know her very well (because essentially I was her replacement in the best friend department) so I was able to be distant enough from the proceedings to be clear-headed, but it was still sad; she was really smart and had just been accepted into a graduate program for something in the medical field. She died while on vacation. Is that the best or the worst way to go?

slave2thewage
07-20-2012, 07:09 PM
A friend of mine from when I was a kid died in a car accident two nights ago. I hadn't seen him in ten years or so, but it was still a huge shock.

Piko
07-21-2012, 07:55 AM
Had a power surge last night and now my TVs fucked. Works, but barely. Completely killed one of my AV inputs. Can't afford a new one until at least next week.

Magtig
07-21-2012, 06:17 PM
Goddammit! Fucking gunshots in broad daylight? Really? Ambulances, cops, we even get a fucking helicopter today.

I FUCKING HATE THIS NEIGHBORHOOD!

I hate goddamn cops too, but somehow I'm wishing SWAT would come in here and clean all these goddamn gangs out.

SHITTY.

edit: Now my entire street is blocked off.

edit 2: So, there was basically a riot in my neighborhood. I guess the cops shot some kid in the head, and people got really angry and were yelling at them and throwing beer bottles at their cars. They eventually left, and half the neighborhood flooded the intersection (my house in on one corner of the intersection). They bashed on any car that tried to get through, and set a dumpster on fire right in the middle of the intersection. Had my house caught fire, everything I own would have burned including my vehicle, which is in an enclosed garage attached to the house. The cops came back, and maced/tear gassed everyone including women and children. My neighbor told me they maced an old woman in the face, and little girls were throwing up from the tear gas. They also shot people with rubber bullets, and let their K-9 dogs into the crowd. Some teenager's arm was mauled and bleeding all over the place. The dumpster is still on the corner, with a half burned mattress next to it.

Now the people down the street are blasting Mexican folk music at 1 am. This whole neighborhood is filled with pissed off people, gangs, drug dealers, and guns.

I need to move for reals.

This is really, really bad. Fuck the police.

http://losangeles.cbslocal.com/video/7530254-near-riot-follows-anaheim-officer-involved-shooting/

Btw, that's my garage that you're seeing in the video where everything is taking place. This is so fucked.

theruiner
07-22-2012, 03:38 AM
^^A police officer lets a police dog loose on a mother holding her child?! Are you KIDDING me with this shit?

And yeah, Magtig, you've got to get out of there ASAP.

Elke
07-22-2012, 12:27 PM
Man, that's not a healthy place to live. I agree, if it's at all possible for you to move, you really should.

Fixer808
07-23-2012, 05:59 PM
GTFO, seriously. LA is a death-hole.

Magtig
07-23-2012, 06:13 PM
It's not LA, it's the home of Disney (heart of darkness). The Anaheim PD shot and killed ANOTHER person last night in a different neighborhood. I don't think this is over. More protests are planned. Yesterday 100 people stormed the actual police station!

I have crazy time lapse footage from my apartment roof of dumpsters burning in the intersection, a major thoroughfare, until 2am this morning. As well as tons of photo journalistic shots from down on the ground. I'm not sure what the hell to do with them though.

Elke
07-24-2012, 04:15 AM
Well, you could always be very cynical about it and sell it. Or share it with one of the user-generated news platforms, or HuffPo.

virushopper
07-25-2012, 12:20 AM
It's not LA, it's the home of Disney (heart of darkness). The Anaheim PD shot and killed ANOTHER person last night in a different neighborhood. I don't think this is over. More protests are planned. Yesterday 100 people stormed the actual police station!

I have crazy time lapse footage from my apartment roof of dumpsters burning in the intersection, a major thoroughfare, until 2am this morning. As well as tons of photo journalistic shots from down on the ground. I'm not sure what the hell to do with them though.

Whoa you guys went full blown tonight. My buddy in the area told me some of the riot crowd threw pieces of wood with nails on them at cops.

Dra508
07-25-2012, 06:05 AM
It's not LA, it's the home of Disney (heart of darkness). The Anaheim PD shot and killed ANOTHER person last night in a different neighborhood. I don't think this is over. More protests are planned. Yesterday 100 people stormed the actual police station!

I have crazy time lapse footage from my apartment roof of dumpsters burning in the intersection, a major thoroughfare, until 2am this morning. As well as tons of photo journalistic shots from down on the ground. I'm not sure what the hell to do with them though.
Should have done it. This FINALLY made the national news.

halloween
07-26-2012, 07:08 AM
Wow magtig- that's fucking scary =[

I just wanted to post a little something quick, it's nothing majorly serious but emotionally i've been tearing up at the seams lately. I've been fluctuating like crazy between being anxious, being depressed, being confident and excited, and it's just driving me crazy. I keep thinking i need to go back to seeing a therapist but i think i've also been able to "manage" it on my own and with friends.
Rationally i know exactly the cause of these feelings- I'm out of school for the first time and I'm going to be moving from boston to new york city, and i've got a job lined up that is fucking super awesome but intimidates the hell out of me because i never thought i'd be working at a place like that! I feel lonely because i feel like i'm leaving all my friends here, despite the fact that some will be moving themselves and for those staying, it's not a long bus ride back to visit for the weekend. I'm just not use to having awesome friends and the idea of keeping contact with friends is really depressing to me just because of my history of isolating myself from cool people- but i'm speaking from highschool and earlier, so i know rationally that's kind of an impractical way of judging how the rest of my life/future actions will be. But even then, things like facebook seems to be there to keep in contact with people, but after having it deleted for several months, i'm just not in the habit of updating/going on it. So i feel like i'm going to offend friends by just popping on it once in a while....this is also an irrational fear of mine- afraid of being considered an impostor and feeling unwanted.

Is it normal to be having a sort of identity crisis after graduating? Ive been anxious as hell about being able to make art and just wondering how that work out, but knowing it all depends on things like finding access to a darkroom... This period of transition is absolutely terrifying to me. I've had one too many life transitions growing up in two countries, and i can't help but to freak out a little inside, thinking that moving will make my life 'start over'- which has a ring of "freedom" and also "i like my life! please don't change!!!" but change is inevitable.

I'll stop rambling at this point, but i'm trying really hard not to cry as i have to go to work in a few minutes... and the only thing keeping me from crying and feeling like a complete failure as a person. I'd rather be posting this instead of feeling desperate and calling my dad to say " I REALLY NEED TO SEE A THERAPIST!!!" for about the 100th time in the past two months, while he just rationalizes everything with me and then i calm down and say "i guess i don't really need a therapist, i've been handling things ok". I've only had fleeting suicide thoughts and it's nothing i have serious impulse or urge to act on, so i'm really doing ok all things considered... It's just the first time in years not seeing a therapist as well, and i'm completely off anything that stabilizes my mood which for the past year or so, it had been my birth control, but i'm off that now too. Ugh. My mind keeps racing and now it's time to go to work...

sentient02970
07-26-2012, 08:25 AM
I completely get where you're coming from with this major transition. Your anxieties are NORMAL. But if you are having to feel this way and thinking you have to "manage it", that's a good sign that you could use help and if you don't have close friends or family in contact with you to help support you then you should consult a therapist. Therapy doesn't mean there's something wrong with you, it is just an avenue to get assistance in something that is overwhelming you. Any thoughts of suicide, even fleeting, means you should consider some help. I say call for an appointment and see what they can do. Anything to help you bridge a difficult time should be in your toolbox, even professional help.

My best to you!

Dra508
07-26-2012, 08:58 PM
I completely get where you're coming from with this major transition. Your anxieties are NORMAL. But if you are having to feel this way and thinking you have to "manage it", that's a good sign that you could use help and if you don't have close friends or family in contact with you to help support you then you should consult a therapist. Therapy doesn't mean there's something wrong with you, it is just an avenue to get assistance in something that is overwhelming you. Any thoughts of suicide, even fleeting, means you should consider some help. I say call for an appointment and see what they can do. Anything to help you bridge a difficult time should be in your toolbox, even professional help.

My best to you!All of that and..... It is normal to have a little anxiety moving from one stage to another, but I have to say halloween you've set yourself up in a great spot: you have a job, sounds like something you want to do, moving to an exciting, active, culturally vibrant city, and at young age where you are suppose gain and learn from all your experiences. You're allowed to make mistakes, learn from them, change course if you want to. Basically, you have life by the balls. Go ride it, enjoy it, don't be afraid of it.

halloween
07-29-2012, 02:18 PM
Thank you both! I've been trying to keep all that in mind instead of "I'M A FAILURE AS A PERSON WTF" and it's been really hard...i think that once i move, if i'm still having bouts of crying every few days, i might end up making an appointment. I'm trying to remain positive that i'm not going to "hate the city" just because i get overwhelmed easily...

sublimaze
08-01-2012, 10:23 PM
As a follow-up from previously, I saw the surgeon, got a biopsy, and it's negative for cancer! I'm going to be ok! Thank you everybody for your support.

^^^halloween, you're a great person and taking big steps in your life is terrifying. Maybe consider going back on meds. Every time I tried to go off them I just got severely depressed/anxious again.

theruiner
08-01-2012, 10:28 PM
You scared me by posting in this thread, Sublimaze. I feared further bad news. Glad to hear it turned out ok!

Kid Charlemagne
08-01-2012, 11:20 PM
As a follow-up from previously, I saw the surgeon, got a biopsy, and it's negative for cancer! I'm going to be ok! Thank you everybody for your support.I second this. SO SO glad everything's okay. You're the last person I would've wanted for something like that to happen

Baphomette
08-02-2012, 01:30 AM
As a follow-up from previously, I saw the surgeon, got a biopsy, and it's negative for cancer! I'm going to be ok! Thank you everybody for your support.
That's fantastic news!! I was actually thinking about you today, too. So happy the results were negative.

Fixer808
08-03-2012, 04:44 PM
Fucking hell, job's not hiring me back for the new season because "They're reducing the core team" or some bullshit. RAGE.

Beef of the Sea
08-03-2012, 08:00 PM
The fuckers, from what you've said, I got the impression that all the other people you worked were completely inept anyway, so good luck to them I say.
Hopefully it'll give you the chance to find something better, with less fuckwit kids.

Pillfred
08-05-2012, 10:23 PM
^ Live it most days anymore it seems.

Financial Aid Disqualification, however is what did it today.

Jumprof
08-06-2012, 04:19 AM
Right now my day is not this good. Could get better if someone could explain me what they are doing (->http://madvertise.com/en/)? Is here anyone who has experience with it? Are they offering the tools for a sort of "Year Zero" promotional campaign?

REPLICA
08-06-2012, 03:07 PM
Found out my mom will have to put her Shih Tzu dog to sleep next friday.

Pillfred
08-07-2012, 01:41 PM
That fucking sucks man, there's no way to appeal it or anything?

Also I finally, after years of saying I would, booked an appointment with a counsellor to start sorting my shit out. Maybe that'll help, but who knows how I'll feel once that comes around.
Ya I can try as it was, imo, a rather odd set of circumstances and misunderstanding of my academic probation. The probation bit didn't bother but it appears the english class it took through continuing ed, the following term, that i dropped (paid for in cash not financial aid) did count against me, hence my disq. I made the deans list the two semesters before I encountered this shit storm of events so hopefully ill be able to sort it out, that or it will just take me 6 years to finish the 2 of school i have left.

littlemonkey613
08-08-2012, 07:52 PM
One of my friends is dying of cancer. We are only 20 :(. I met him after his diagnosis and I didn't expect to get so close to him so fast but he took me to Coachella and the past few months we've really gotten close. Today his mother (whom is also very sick and dying slowly of MS) sent me a message on facebook asking for my address because apparantly he has written a letter to me in case anything happens to him soon. She said that our friendship has really meant a lot to him. I'm so scared for him and also because my best friend in the whole world is his girlfriend and I'm scared that she will never be the same after this. She is strong and amazing but the idea of her suffering after his death is almost as horrible as the thought of him dying. I've been hanging out with them a whole lot recently and we have sleepovers at his apartment (the 3 of us in one bed like 3 pigs in a blanket haha) I cherish these moments and I don't think I'm ready to let go.


Turns out her boyfriend is emotionally manipulative and border line abusive. (Their biggest fights are about her not wanting to have sex with him) A lot of random things she would say with months in between that used to strike me as odd all make sense. The fact that I'm so close to him makes me want to kill him even more. She's now having counseling to get the courage to leave him (and get rid of her misplaced guilt). Their romantic relationship basically started because she didn't want to be his girlfriend and HE BLACKMAILED HER. He said if she didnt go out with him hed stop beign friends with her and not tell her the cancer results because he "cares about her too much to be just her friend" FUCK EVERYTHING. (this girl is intellectually against monogamy and relationships in general but is too insecure in her voice and scared to lose friends to say no when a close friend asks her out, although their entitlement and pursuit even tho she DOES say no initially makes them guilty as fuck in my eyes) Everything is so obvious to me now that shes finally being honest. I love this girl more than anything and I've never been affected by a friends suffering as much as this. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU. He's lucky the cancer will be the one to get him. I don't even care about sounding harsh. This basically means she has been having sex with someone out of guilt and manipulation for months. And the fact that they fight about it means her opposition is no secret. Fuck this omg. FUCK HIM OMG. The only thing keeping me from labeling this rape is the fact that I don't want to spend life in prison for killing a cancer patient. omg my anger WHAT DO I DO WITH IT. I feel so betrayed on so many levels. How dare he treat me the way he does and act the way he does when behind closed doors hes arguing about her right to her own fucking body. Omg

frankie teardrop
08-13-2012, 02:57 PM
been a long time coming, but finally giving up playing music once and for all. far too many disappointments and let downs over the past few years and i just don't have the interest. i was wavering on selling all the gear in case i changed my mind or wanted to record on my own but i think it's just time to ditch it and move on...

miss k bee
08-13-2012, 05:02 PM
Have to work a week and a half of dayshift before going on to nights and it is really wiping me out, not good at going to bed or waking up early.

Dra508
08-19-2012, 10:26 AM
Maybe I'll just go in and explain why I booked it and I'll see where it goes from there...You answered your own question. No one is going to bite you, just go, one step at a time.

Frozen Beach
08-22-2012, 09:32 PM
I have something to admit that I'm not proud of. Remember that girl I bitched about constantly a while back? Well, admittedly, I made the stupid decision of bringing her back into my life after she told me she was going to go to therapy to help her deal with her problems. That was a lie, and ever since letting back into my life, she's been nothing but hurtful towards me, then quickly apologetic. Today though she went too far. Today, publicly, she started talking shit about me on facebook. How apparently she thinks I'm "creepy." I've been nothing but nice to her, and I've left her alone most of the time unless she'd message me, which would always lead her to asking me the question: "Why is it that you are the only one who talks to me?" I believe now she has her answer as to why no one else will talk to her. Now, she doesn't even have me to talk to. She obviously has mental/emotional problems she needs to deal with before ever having friends, something she refuses to accept. I don't know. I see such good in her heart, but it seems like she's just drenched in negativity and fear. I wish I could help her, but I can't. It's all too much for me to stand. I really hopes she wakes the fuck up from her delusional mindset. As for me though, I no longer wish to be involved. Even if she fixes herself, she doesn't deserve to know me.

Oh, and I find it funny how her sister apologized on behalf of her. Her sister seems like a cool person, but it's a shame that I don't know if I can even stand to know her.

frankie teardrop
08-23-2012, 11:15 AM
you really wanna stick it to her/make her more crazy? start dating her sister.

Frozen Beach
08-23-2012, 03:01 PM
you really wanna stick it to her/make her more crazy? start dating her sister.
Hah. Unless I become a Woman over night, that'd never happen.

I'm willing to bet money though as soon as I start dating someone, and she finds out, she'll end up being jealous and try to get back in my life. No way will I ever accept her back. I'm not gonna lie, I have moments where I just want everything ok, but it'll never be ok.

frankie teardrop
08-23-2012, 04:08 PM
well, never is an awfully strong term. people grow and change, so if you can forgive her down the road, you never know. but obviously that will take a while, and it's definitely best to steer clear for an indefinite amount of time.

Piko
08-28-2012, 08:31 PM
Waiting like a sitting duck for Issac to hit. 3-4 days with no power. And I'm supposed to work tomorrow? Hah! Storm's supposed to hit in the early morning. Can't imagine how busy a restaurant would be right after a hurricane.

Frozen Beach
08-28-2012, 09:02 PM
well, never is an awfully strong term. people grow and change, so if you can forgive her down the road, you never know. but obviously that will take a while, and it's definitely best to steer clear for an indefinite amount of time.
People that know her(not friends with her, but friends with her sister) have told me she has always been like this. It's like she's just accepted the way she is and has given up.

theruiner
08-29-2012, 12:35 AM
I just locked myself out of my bathroom, and I can't get the door to unlock. On top of that, my bedroom doorknob broke, like, literally ten minutes after that happened. And it's after hours, so it would cost me $100 to have a maintenance guy come out. I'm not going to do that.

So, I get to wash myself off at the kitchen sink tomorrow. So I have to run out and get soap and shampoo at the store. And then I have to be up in a little over six hours. Did I mention that I've been dripping in sweat all day, and can now basically just give myself a quick rinse off at the kitchen sink? Did I mention that I've gotten very little sleep the last four or five nights? Did I mention that I moved this weekend and one thing after another after another after another have gone wrong? Inexplicably?

Oh, well. At least I have to go to work tomorrow. At least there's that.

Fixer808
08-29-2012, 08:32 AM
I just locked myself out of my bathroom, and I can't get the door to unlock. On top of that, my bedroom doorknob broke, like, literally ten minutes after that happened. And it's after hours, so it would cost me $100 to have a maintenance guy come out. I'm not going to do that.

So, I get to wash myself off at the kitchen sink tomorrow. So I have to run out and get soap and shampoo at the store. And then I have to be up in a little over six hours. Did I mention that I've been dripping in sweat all day, and can now basically just give myself a quick rinse off at the kitchen sink? Did I mention that I've gotten very little sleep the last four or five nights? Did I mention that I moved this weekend and one thing after another after another after another have gone wrong? Inexplicably?

Oh, well. At least I have to go to work tomorrow. At least there's that.
Look on the bright side: no more dick-bag roommate.

Baphomette
10-05-2012, 01:18 AM
One of my closest friends just had a second brain aneurysm (first one 20 years ago). Clot was removed and she's in an induced coma. Doctors are 90% sure she's going to be fine but are watching for swelling.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

xmd 5a
10-10-2012, 06:35 AM
I had one of the fucked-est days of my life today... My wife and I recently bought our first home and today we moved in. I was expecting stress, but I wasn't expecting this much.

Firstly, we got up early to pack as much stuff in the car and get over to the real estate to pick up the keys to our new place by 8:30am. Our new place is a ~20 minute drive from our previous address and we had arranged to have the removalists come at 10am, more than enough time for us to pick up the keys, unload the car at the new place and drive back to our old place to meet the removalists. Well, nothing worked out to plan. My wife was going to drive the car over and I was going to follow behind on my motorcycle. Well, the bloody motorcycle refused to start (hadn't used it in a few days, figure it's a battery issue. So I squeezed myself into the packed car and we set off.

The real estate didn't have the keys at the office- they were in a lockbox at the address. What's more, the agent who knew the code was stuck in a meeting until 9:45am. Even worse, the removalists decided they'd ignore the 10am agreed time and come instead at 9:40am. So while we were waiting for the keys and unloading the car, the removalist truck was sitting in the driveway at our old place doing nothing but still costing us money. By the time we got back to the old place and let them in our bill was nearing the AU$100 mark with nothing to show for it.

So the moving got done and we found ourselves half a grand poorer, but stress over. Right? NOPE.

My wife took our toddler out into the backyard to play and noticed that a few panels were missing off the fence. There are renovations going on either side of our place, so we initially figured the contractors removed the panels for better access next door. We thought nothing more of it until we turned the water on and noticed there was no pressure and a loud gushing noise was coming from around the back. We had a look at where the noise was coming from and saw that the brand new hot water system installed before we bought the place was missing. SOMEONE STOLE OUR FUCKING HOT WATER SYSTEM!!!!!!! We figured the sneaky bastards probably took the panels off the fence to make this task easier. We got onto the real estate straight away about it and they said they'd get something sorted so we could have the water turned on, but after numerous phonecalls no-one turned up. My daughter just vomited all over my wife and I am a sweaty mess but no shower for us until tomorrow when we go back to our old place to finish up the cleaning (JOY! /sarcasm). It's nearing midnight here so I'm going to bed (see: a mattress on the floor because I misplaced my toolbag in the rushed move and can't put the bed together until I find it) and will deal with this shit tomorrow. Not sure if I'll be able to sleep though- paranoid about people breaking in and stealing all of our shit.

Sorry about the rant but I'm so stressed and an having trouble thinking clearly.

TLDR: Motorcycle wouldn't start, moving woes, wasted $100 for nothing, hot water system stolen from our new house, I stink.

PS: This message was bought to you by patchy-and-slow-as-fuck prepaid mobile broadband...

sentient02970
10-10-2012, 07:54 AM
^^^ Good god! At first reading it I was thinking "oh ok yes those typical "best laid plans" but then...jeez dude. Best of luck to all of you. I'm sure once you are moved in and all is set as it should be, this will become your best move in story ever to have a few beers over.

Baphomette
10-10-2012, 11:16 PM
No change in my friend's condition. Still in an induced coma.
FUCK.

REPLICA
10-18-2012, 11:00 PM
It might not seem like much compared to the things going on between other ETS members.... But I just dropped my iPod Touch on it's screen and now it's pretty cracked. I know I don't have a warranty since it's over the age... Hopefully a rifle that I own will sell and I'll be able to get a new iPod.

Fixer808
10-19-2012, 03:32 AM
No change in my friend's condition. Still in an induced coma.
FUCK.
Any updates?

redshoewearer
10-20-2012, 08:19 PM
xmd 5a - how awful - this is 5 days later - did you get another hot water system?

Miss Baphomette how is your friend?

Replica, have you thought of buying a used part for the ipod touch? There are a lot of videos online about how to replace parts of ipods. I'm not an engineer or anything, but I've managed to replace screens, batteries and headphone jacks. Its kind of picky work and you may need tiny screwdrivers, but it is doable.

Baphomette
10-20-2012, 11:34 PM
Any updates?

Miss Baphomette how is your friend?

Doctors took her off propofol (sp?) on Thursday night and she regained consciousness yesterday morning. She's able to follow commands but she's still intubated. They're putting in an external shunt tomorrow morning at which point they'll remove the breathing tube and we'll find out if her speech has been impaired. Keeping my fingers tightly crossed.

Fixer808
10-21-2012, 03:31 AM
All good signs!

Frozen Beach
10-21-2012, 04:51 AM
Can't sleep, treading on old feelings and just feeling deeply depressed as always. Today has been emotionally draining despite nothing actually happening.

Dra508
10-21-2012, 12:17 PM
Can't sleep, treading on old feelings and just feeling deeply depressed as always. Today has been emotionally draining despite nothing actually happening.Don't go it alone.... Get out, get help.

Jinsai
10-23-2012, 04:18 PM
after a fairly good stretch of maintaining the whole sobriety thing, I hit a bad and frustrating day, and wound up getting completely trashed last night. Today, I feel beyond miserable, and I'm pretty sure I'm still drunk. I don't think I've ever felt so trapped and pointless. I feel like I'm on the verge of a complete nervous meltdown.

aggroculture
10-23-2012, 04:25 PM
Maybe do some stuff that makes you feel physically better: eat your favourite foods - comfort foods, take a warm shower - that kind of thing.
For me thc and masturbation (and ice cream) and maybe some coffee do wonders for misery hangovers.

Dra508
10-23-2012, 04:42 PM
Yeah Jinsai, don't beat yourself up too much. Try again.

Ice cream and masturbation - ahhhhhh.

allegro
10-23-2012, 06:37 PM
Pizza makes everything better.

Alcohol withdrawal causes hella anxiety. But pizza fixes it. See above.

Aladdinsanity
10-24-2012, 07:05 PM
Just found out my ex-wife has been taking our 3yo son to church (Mormon) for the past 3 months.

Dra508
10-24-2012, 08:54 PM
Just found out my ex-wife has been taking our 3yo son to church (Mormon) for the past 3 months.I only respond to this since I'm close to someone who has a similar issue with his ex-wife and religion. Does your separation agreement say anything specific about religion or what one can do with the child when one has custody? They worked it out that when he has his daughter, she goes to his church, when the ex-wife has the kid, she goes to her church. Neither of them love the idea, but the reality may be that the kid feels that much more loved and attended to, in whatever community they are in at the time. I used the example of my mom who clearly told me when she was little she loved going to her Mom's church (Catholic) then her Dad's church Episcopal, every Sunday. And my Grand parents were married!!

Frozen Beach
10-25-2012, 01:11 AM
Sigh. Once again, suffering from depression, but this time I was such a fucking idiot, that I decided to try and buzz my head. Big mistake. The beard trimmer I was using is incredibly shitty, plus it died midway through and I have to recharge. Most likely going to have to just shave my damn head since it's very patchy. Why the fuck do I do such stupid things like this?

Fixer808
10-25-2012, 01:18 AM
Meh, I did that once. I looked like a Nazi prison guard for a few weeks, but it wasn't the end of the world. Hair grows back, bro, it's all good!

jessamineny
10-25-2012, 08:30 AM
Go have a barber give you a proper buzz?

Aladdinsanity
10-25-2012, 01:09 PM
We're still in the process of making the separation official (monetary reasons). Religion was never really a discussion during our relationship (mostly because I grew up in the Midwest; she also seemed uncomfortable with my atheism). She claimed to be lapsed Mormon (agnostic, I guess), so we both agreed to raise him secular. I don't know the specifics of her faith now, but she's been attending church regularly again and bringing him with her, making it a primary activity for him on Sundays.

allegro
10-25-2012, 09:24 PM
Church is good for kids. What's the big deal? He can change his mind when he reaches the age of reason. Kids love church. It has structure and stories and crafts and activities and it helps them through divorce.

Trust me: I was that kid.

sublimaze
10-25-2012, 09:34 PM
Depends on the church, though. Mine was like yours, pretty benign. Others teach kids to hate themselves if they're gay or masturbate.

littlemonkey613
10-25-2012, 09:49 PM
Church is good for kids. What's the big deal? He can change his mind when he reaches the age of reason. Kids love church. It has structure and stories and crafts and activities and it helps them through divorce.

Trust me: I was that kid.

I went to a great Church that was loads of fun. However, none of the positives will ever ever justify in my opinion being preached to by a man who holds a position I can never attain simply because I am a woman my entire childhood, being told Jesus died for my sins, being told Jesus rose from the dead, being told hell and heaven exist, and quite frankly being told God exists for sure. Like I don't understand. I still spend half my intellectual time trying to peel off the layers and implications of the things I was taught (what I feel guilty for etc.) It would make a WORLD of difference if none of it was taught in absolutes or as an absolute truth (like many Universalist Churches - I honestly have no qualms with that kind of Church). But seriously the Jesus thing o.O Never 4give! Why did they do that to me?! It would have been awesome if my parents had questioning and doubt discussions when we came back from Church and stuff but nope! Luckily I've always been sort of an angry cynic so I started challenging them ideologically from as early as 6 - so they tell me - but its still really frustrating when I hear others say its all totally fine. I went to a non-crazy liberal church and it certainly wasn't fine. At least definitely not for someone who is no longer a believer. Also it took a lot I mean a LOT for me to come to terms with it. I would pray at night that I would believe in God again just because of how traumatizing it was. So yeah I'm just trying to combat the notion that kids just grow up and all of a sudden have reason. It didn't work like that for me. It was honestly a pretty horrible thing to go through. I challenged my faith head on and it was still a hard rigorous, painful process. The worst part was knowing it wasn't necessary. Adults and authority figures decided to tell me things they couldn't prove from the ripe age of 2. And I have every right to blame them for what I went/ go through.

Again I'm specifically talking about teaching things as absolute fact when they are literally non-provable which I think is a very fair criticism to make.

Magtig
10-25-2012, 09:53 PM
Depends on the church, though. Mine was like yours, pretty benign. Others teach kids to hate themselves if they're gay or masturbate.
Other churches such as the Mormon church, where I was taught that masturbation was a disgusting way to "defile your temple" (your temple being your body), and that even thinking sexual thoughts was just as bad as the actual act of sinning. And gay people? Pfft! See Prop 8 in California in the off chance that you're not already familiar with the infamous homophobia of the Mormon church. I thought I could make some joke about all of this, but I still have complexes to this day with this stuff that probably won't ever go away. As I go through the ebbs and flows in my life I realize over and over, especially at the lowest points, that my default reaction to everything is to blame myself and hate myself for not being perfect.

That doesn't mean your kid will take it to heart in the same way I did, Aladdinsanity, or even that they'll hear all the same stuff in Sunday school that I did, but Mormonism left many ugly marks on me. Still, if you demonize it you'll just run into more trouble. I never had an alternative thought process; I didn't have the idea that there even was an alternative thought process other than 'IT'S EVIL!' If you teach your kid to love themselves and treat others well, then it won't really matter what their religious beliefs are or are not.

allegro
10-25-2012, 10:02 PM
Exactly!!

You don't just set your kid loose in church without discussing what they're learning, and encouraging them to be open-minded. Kids (and people) are only open to radical brainwashing (wherever it comes from: church, school, friends) if they don't have guiding parents and a strong sense of self. I went to CATHOLIC church! (I was 4 when my parents divorced.) But, I also went to Pentecostal, Baptist and Lutheran Vacation Bible school. My mom wanted us to be active, have fun, understand right from wrong, but also use our own judgment.

And now I'm Buddhist.

Remember: HE'S THREE.

Both mom and child are going through a divorce, which is very traumatic and difficult. Be careful about what is a battle and territorial and what is transitive or a coping method in this difficult time.

(I'm not only a child of divorce, I'm a divorce paralegal. You're not likely to win this battle in a court of law.)